On Day 1, relapsed. On lockdown and lost the fight of staying gambling free. Only lost a small amount but raging with myself that I gave in and thought with less too bet on I could control it. The first bet again caused my feeling not what I lost. I am a compulsive gambler and always will be. You just think some times your stronger and can control it. I never lost all I had so that’s a positive I suppose I came too my senses and never kept going. It thought this is wrong and I need too stop or I will regret it. I just want too be free. I have all blocks on but thought I will get my mate too put the bets on and makes it harder too put on. But easy too just call up too put on. I need too get my head straight and focus on coming on here everyday and talking too people who are going through the same situation and don’t feel alone. All support would be much a appreciated.
Don't be hard on yourself mate.
I know it's frustrating and it's P****d you off, but there's one sentence in this that you said that speaks volumes.
"I came to my senses and never kept going."
You understood that you messed up and you stopped before it was too late.
It's a blip on your journey that's all.pick yourself up and dust yourself off tomorrow.
ONE DAY ATA TIME!
I wish you all the best.
Matt
I'm in the same position mate at 21 years old. Got myself into 15k worth of debt. It's a tough lesson to learn and I'm over trying to make it back now. Good luck mate, hope you achieve your dreams.
What blocks do you have in place and have you told your mate now not to help you gamble?
We cannot underestimate the power of this addiction.Try not to focus on the past or the future or even counting days your bet free. Take one day at a time and if you reach the end of a day without gambling give yourself a pat on the back. Well done for reaching out and admitting you had a bet. Many of us would have crumbled and let the addiction take over again. Communication is massive help and the more you connect the easier things are.
Try and stay positive. I recently relapsed after having a long spell away from gambling, so I feel your frustration more than anything. Try and remember of all the days that you did not have a bet, they were days that previously would of been spent consumed by gambling. They were good days.
There will be many more good days.
Take it one day at a time.
Thanks for all the kind words guys. I have all blocks in place. Gamban and gamstop. Had a few days off there to clear my head with it all. Been a hard time with my health and all the stress of gambling and what I have lost the bast 20 years. I will never be able to control my gambling. I am a compulsive gamble who can never stop till he has lost everything. If someone had said to me gambling would cause me so much pain in my life that I would want to escape this life to save me from gambling. I have Seen drink addictions and people lose everything but gambling you could lose everything twice over and over again. I am so much happier not gambling, I need to accept this second chance and no make the next 20 years full of the same pain. Stay strong folks
GF day 6. Feeling a bit more positive today. The sun is shining and planning on keeping busy and beating this demon. Under no circumstances can I gamble. I am a compulsive gambler. 20 years of misery stops. There is a pandemic in the word and people are suffering through no choice of there own. When I gamble I suffer by causing myself all the pain. I have got myself in a small amount of debt that was close to getting out of control. Best getting out when I can. Stay strong folks and another GF day.
Aliwonton,
re your comment above about the drinking, there's a saying in GA. "drink and drugs will kill you, but with gambling you'll kill yourself." An unfortunately true saying.
This illness is insatiable and will take you and others for everything.
Day 6 off a bet is great. Keep it going, one day at a time.
Chris.
Day 8 gamble free. Keeping myself busy and positive. Life without gambling is so mure chilled and relaxed. Where your in the gambling bubble your bouncing around chasing your life away causing extreme high levels of stress. I am a compulsive gambler and cannot gamble in anyway. Everyone stay strong. The sun is shining and don’t give in to temptation. Let’s build a better future together.
Day 11 GF. staying positive and keeping busy. Not thinking to much about the past now and thinking every day that goes bye is another day I have beat this demon. I am a compulsive gambler and cannot gamble in anyway. I must remember myself this everyday. I will never be free of this demon but I can do everything I can to stay away from the demon. Stay strong folks and have a good Friday.
day 12 GF. The sun is shining and the plan today is to keep busy and not to think of the demon that’s controlled my live for the past 20 years. Every day I don’t gamble no I class myself as a winner. I am a compulsive gambler and must never gamble in anyway. Stay strong folks.
Day 15 GF. Sitting out on the decking in the sun reading my book. The things I couldn’t do when gambling as I couldn’t find the time as I was always looking for my next bet. How the time’s have changed. Taking every day as it comes but getting stronger every day. I am a compulsive gambler and always will be. I must not gamble in anyway.
GF 17 days. Really starting to believe in myself again. When gambling I lose all believe in myself and am on a runaway train to self destruction. I can’t live like that any longer. The lows got harder to take like they pained me cause I had been here so many times. Stay strong folks and here is to a GF future.
GF day 18. Been kept busy all day during lockdown and focusing on reading and playing fifa 20. just remembering myself every day I am a compulsive gambler and must not gamble in anyway. Staying positive and remembering myself I can’t repair the past. Never forget where I have been but don’t let it affect my future .
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