Hiya Charlieboy
What did you think off there plite is the same as ours and so glad they got it out there it's not just us and he definitely didn't need the money so it's in their somewhere and we should be proud at the moment when we've got the chance and we're not gambling
Yes kev I feel thankful every day that I haven't gambled and when I read all the posts on here I'm proud to be part of a community where people bare their souls in their darkest hours ask for help and advice and receive it in abundance. Well done to everyone on this site who are fighting, sometimes winning the fight sometimes losing the fight but keep coming back to try and try again in the hope of success
Hiya Charlieboy
Was so sorry to read about your plight to achieve your bundle of joy who is now 15yrs old and lucky to have you as a mum. As I've said if you wanted you could've gambled on line so easy. Your doing great Charlieboy and you help me throughout my journey each day, thanks for being there
Hiya Charlieboy
How are you today? I hope things are okay and your still fighting strong. I managed to have 5hrs sleep last night so woke up feeling ok, and that's all we can hope for another day on our tough journey but we're getting their one day at a time.
Hey kev I'm good ty was good for me getting that post done yesterday all came spilling out. 5 hours sleep that's really good puts you in a better frame of mind. Yes one day at a time kev all we can do. Hope things are going bit better at home for you ??. Onwards and upwards m8
Good to hear from you Charlieboy
Things are bearable at home and at the minute that I can put up with. Another day the gambling company's haven't got my money, well not that I've got any but you know what I mean. Put it this way I'm a lot better than I was at the start of all this. I'm just taking things one day at a time. It's just amazing how many people have actually got this affliction. I'm looking forward to seeing what this new lords report is going to do about this gambling harm and if It will help people in the future.
Hiya Charlieboy
Hope you had a good shop yesterday and if your husband hasn't been shopping in 15yrs boy would he get a shock. I had a day off yesterday as didn't feel to good but today's another day guess we will always have down days but that's just the way it goes. Hope your okay and fighting strong keep up the good work and speak to you soon
Hey diary day 37 today. I'm having a very good day today not only am I 37days gamble free but more importantly my darling son has been asked to train with the county cricket team and I am one super PROUD mum!
Hey Charlieboy
How great for your son you must be so proud off him and he must be amazing to be picked at this level , plus so proud off you still being gamble free, always leave time to be proud off yourself as your doing great! ,
Hi Charlie,
Thank you for your posts. I just read your all diary and pleased to see the measures you put in place to aid your recovery. I also like to see the eagerness to help yourself, including counselling and upcoming GA meetings. You're right about face to face support. It is very different from online one and i believe will benefit you greatly!
I also cant help but worry a bit reading about your relationship with hubby. Something really weighs you down and i am truly sorry to read. Sometimes we need to look after ourselves meaning that we need to let the not so healthy stuff/people go. If relationship is toxic, don't look back. ..your son is old enough to understand also.....HOWEVER, i am not telling you what to do and i am sure you will figure this out yourself when you're stronger and your head clearer...for now, continue to do what's working for you...so far, you're taking massive steps forward so be very proud of that!it will get easier with time...
As of my girl...well, as you're aware, i have the deepest love for her. We went through lifes ups and downs together and truly are inseparable. She is 7 years old staffie and i rehomed her only 3.5 years ago...so all in all, i didnt have long years with her however bond is so strong and never thought its possible!!
The incident on Wednesday shook me to the core. Still don't think i will ever recover from it... cannot bare the thought of seeing her in pain....
Since vet is not sure what has happened i thought all sorts of things even blaming myself for maybe accidentally injuring her in my sleep??? ...or maybe it was the walk the night before where she dipped in tbe river...it was cold that day and maybe that's what triggered her muscles to seize up?..was it a trapped nerve?...or is it joints playing up....million questions for sure and not sure if i ever have the answers...main thing is, she is not displaying any pain anymore ...since that day. ..i would like to think all this was a bad dream but i know it wasn't and piece of my heart has already gone and will never be repaired however i shall continue to take care of her with what i have left inside my broken heart...
Didn't mean to waffle on for so long..so sorry.
Hope you're having a good day and woofs to your girls from my Bella ???? xx
Day 39. Still super chuffed with my son and at last cricket season has started. Which is also really good for me going to watch him play talking to other parents( socially distanced of course !) When I'm really busy and occupied my mind is too . As I'm starting to feel better and more sociable I'm seeing what a very bad hit my mental health took during lockdown and fear of covid 19 and all the really negative effects from that. I keep checking the GA website lots of meetings starting up in england. Wales is always week or 2 behind so hopeful soon. I need to go to a face to face meeting I'm at my limit on the phone I need to see the face I'm talking to. I've opened up a lot about gambling and over last few days with my husband. But I need to talk with other recovering gamblers share and hear their struggles and how they,ve dealt with things. I'm really grateful for my recovery so far but I want to do as much as I can to keep it going. So I'll keep checking and waiting.
Hiya Charlieboy
Hope your okay was great to hear about your son and know wonder your so proud and remember and be proud off yourself as your doing amazing, will catch up with you later stay proud
hiya Charlieboy
Hope your okay I've put a few replies on and had a rant on my page just to let you know I'm okay and still here, I hope your husband is beginning to understand what a horrible addiction you've had to get control of and how well your doing. Keep up the good work as we all know how well your doing
Hi Charlie,
Thank you for your posts. I just read your all diary and pleased to see the measures you put in place to aid your recovery. I also like to see the eagerness to help yourself, including counselling and upcoming GA meetings. You're right about face to face support. It is very different from online one and i believe will benefit you greatly!
I also cant help but worry a bit reading about your relationship with hubby. Something really weighs you down and i am truly sorry to read. Sometimes we need to look after ourselves meaning that we need to let the not so healthy stuff/people go. If relationship is toxic, don't look back. ..your son is old enough to understand also.....HOWEVER, i am not telling you what to do and i am sure you will figure this out yourself when you're stronger and your head clearer...for now, continue to do what's working for you...so far, you're taking massive steps forward so be very proud of that!it will get easier with time...
As of my girl...well, as you're aware, i have the deepest love for her. We went through lifes ups and downs together and truly are inseparable. She is 7 years old staffie and i rehomed her only 3.5 years ago...so all in all, i didnt have long years with her however bond is so strong and never thought its possible!!
The incident on Wednesday shook me to the core. Still don't think i will ever recover from it... cannot bare the thought of seeing her in pain....
Since vet is not sure what has happened i thought all sorts of things even blaming myself for maybe accidentally injuring her in my sleep??? ...or maybe it was the walk the night before where she dipped in tbe river...it was cold that day and maybe that's what triggered her muscles to seize up?..was it a trapped nerve?...or is it joints playing up....million questions for sure and not sure if i ever have the answers...main thing is, she is not displaying any pain anymore ...since that day. ..i would like to think all this was a bad dream but i know it wasn't and piece of my heart has already gone and will never be repaired however i shall continue to take care of her with what i have left inside my broken heart...
Didn't mean to waffle on for so long..so sorry.
Hope you're having a good day and woofs to your girls from my Bella ???? xx
Just to make sure you see this...im on moderation..posts appear later than normal xx
Yes just saw your rant does you good to get it off your chest and your righr. Don't drug pushers get punished more than the users for the lives that they wreck? No one seems concerned about the pushers in our addiction probably because the government makes money off our pushers !! All messed up kev. Hope you start to feel a bit more stable as it's horrible being so up and down its exhausting I'm def starting to chill a bit more haven't got that anxiety all the time now which is really nice. Take care speak tomorrow
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