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I'm a compulsive gambler  

 
George299
(@george299)

I've tried and failed to give up gambling many times before, but I've never been this determined to be honest.

My money is going into a separate account from now on, which my sister has the password to. All rent and Bills will come out every payday.  And then a weekly standing order of £50 will go into my monzo account. Gambling is blocked on there but I still need to ensure no cash is withdrawn and used in bookies. I've been told that under no circumstances will I be getting more than the £50 each week. Whatever is left over each month will become savings. 

Gambling has ruined my life. I became very ill a few years back, an autoimmune disease which is stress related. I'm certain that gambling played a big part in this. The stress that I have been putting myself under for such a long time is very damaging, mentally and physically. I wont go into detail about the illness but I ended up requiring surgery, and will need to have another surgery next summer. I want and need to ensure that I am very healthy when I have this done. Gambling anymore will definitely mean I will not be healthy.

I have chosen gambling over friendships and family and haven't even been able to get a girlfriend due to me choosing gambling over everything.

Im up to my neck in debt (I have plans in place to repay over a very long period). My credit score is absolutely awful and am now unable to get a mortgage or absolutely any kind of credit.

I have lied, stolen, committed major fraud, sold everything I ever owned. Sold my car for next to nothing so I could pay my rent one month... and then gambled it and didnt pay my rent.

I simply have to realise now that I am heavily addicted to this drug and I need to recover from this disease before my life is over. Life is short and I need to sort it.

I will keep posting on this topic and keep me motivated and always remember why I won't gamble again. 

 

Quote
Posted : 13th September 2020 4:02 pm
Charlieboy
(@charlieboy)

Hi george299, I also am a compulsive gambler in recovery , today 102 days since I last gambled. You have made an awesome start in passing your finances to your sister, hopefully she will be strong enough to tell you NO if you pester her for more money. My husband is in charge of our finances, combination of that and gamstop to block online sites were uppermost at the start of my recovery. Have you thought about self excluding from bookies to shut another door( more doors closed the better) You are posting in the right place for support all of us have done some of the same things, others have done more. But as you said in your post its not just about money there are other things that are lost more important lost relationships, love ,respect, self esteem......and more. You don't say how old you are but it's never too late to regain your life. I'm 54now and I don't intend to waste another second on gambling it's truly evil . I count myself massively blessed that my husband( although still rocky) son and other family are truly supportive and with me in this. I've got my life back I'm happier calmer more stable and to keep my recovery going forward and actually change I'm going to weekly GA meetings, something for you to consider. I can't explain what a feeling it is to sit in a room of compulsive gamblers where you don't have to explain...What it is to be a gambler...why....how it feels etc I always feel alive when I come home !! Hope that you achieve recovery and reclaim your life, with best wishes

ReplyQuote
Posted : 13th September 2020 6:37 pm
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