fresh start

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 Boro
(@boro)
Posts: 974
Topic starter
 

Life now gambling wise is the best it’s ever been. The £2 reduction has helped because I’m sure if it wasn’t I’d have traveled to go on the fobt. I never beat this gambling addiction but one things for certain I fight against it. People need to realise on this forum that yes you can come on this forum crying and people will help you. But when you don’t help yourself and keep putting same s**t on. People might get a bit sick of it. People need to open there eyes 

 
Posted : 26th October 2019 8:35 pm
S.A
 S.A
(@s-687)
Posts: 4883
 

Hiya.. well done on keeping away from your demons. Alas the reduction to a 2 pound stake never made any difference for me, cos that's my poison in the bookies.

Anyway keep fighting the good fight.. cheers.. S.A

 
Posted : 27th October 2019 8:35 am
 Boro
(@boro)
Posts: 974
Topic starter
 

I always have to be on me guard and stay strong s.a. One little play on the the fobt could end in disaster again and I be honest I couldn’t take all the debt and loss again. Done it far to many times. 

 
Posted : 29th October 2019 6:52 pm
signalman
(@signalman)
Posts: 1199
 

Hi Graeme 

Are you ok mate? I thought about you last night and starting thinking about your last message, coupled with not having heard from you for a while...

I hope you havent been roped back into the darkness. If you have, please remember what it feels like to have put the demons behind you these past few months, now you've had a taste of the good life - everyone should benefit (yourself, your daughter, family, friends etc) - I hope you have been able to move forward and stay on this path.

Either way, I was thinking... Although it may seem a bit a**e over t*t - might it be a good time to ramp up the physical blocks you have against the gambling? If you are continuing to gather the clean time, may it not hurt to hand over some financial control or check in with the local dens in your area (over the phone) to make sure they have your details and photo up-to-date on their system?

Sometimes I think people are perhaps more vulnerable after they have put a little bit of time behind them as the initial resilience starts to wear off, complacency can set in and in turn the urges can thrive. 

So many times for me, in a flash, before I knew it I was back to square one. And left feeling dejected. I hope you have had more luck than me in this respect!

Anyway, nowt wrong with a bit of self-preservation at this stage (ie the extra blocks) - they can only safeguard you further from the pitfalls of our illness.

Hope you're well bud ? drop us a message when you're about

This post was modified 4 years ago by signalman
 
Posted : 18th November 2019 11:45 am
 Boro
(@boro)
Posts: 974
Topic starter
 

Everything going ok at the moment singleman. Financially I’m pretty well off at the moment but like I have always said 1 moment of madness and I be back to square one. But hope your keeping well mate?

 
Posted : 18th November 2019 6:05 pm
signalman
(@signalman)
Posts: 1199
 
Posted by: Boro

Everything going ok at the moment singleman. Financially I’m pretty well off at the moment but like I have always said 1 moment of madness and I be back to square one. But hope your keeping well mate?

Yes mate doing ok to be fair.

Great to hear how your fortunes are turning since putting those machines behind you. And you're right to point out about the 'one moment of madness'

I think I mentioned before in my diary it's not so much the highs from gambling that were my undoing before, it's not being able to handle the lows that got me.

If I placed one bet, just one, and it didn't come in... I'd be compelled to double up and get my return. I didn't have the emotional maturity to accept that my initial wager was gone... It was mine and I was going to get it back, how dare the machine take money off me that wasn't theirs... And so the deadly spiral begins.

Just never place that first bet I guess... Then the rest will sort itself. That's what they say in GA anyway ?

 
Posted : 18th November 2019 7:12 pm
 Boro
(@boro)
Posts: 974
Topic starter
 

Pleased your ok signalman. That’s exactly me I could not take my initial wager had lost  I’d have to keep trying to get it back instead of excepting the loss. I do miss the buzz if you can understand that but definitely don’t miss the devastation it caused. I be honest I did go in a betting shop a few weeks ago but a woman came over and said are you graeme I was like no I’m Michael obviously I am graeme and she was like have you any I’d I was like no. Then she just left me but that was my que to leave. 

This post was modified 4 years ago by Boro
 
Posted : 19th November 2019 1:41 pm
signalman
(@signalman)
Posts: 1199
 
Posted by: Boro

I be honest I did go in a betting shop a few weeks ago but a woman came over and said are you graeme I was like no I’m Michael obviously I am graeme and she was like have you any I’d I was like no. Then she just left me but that was my que to leave. 

Respect your honesty mate, also huge respect for making the move out the door when you did... It's great hearing that you took charge of your own destiny in that moment.

Great to hear that the den staff are doing their jobs to the best of their ability too and are coming good with their commitment to protect problem gamblers from harm...

??

Anyway keep fighting mate. Good to hear from you.

Ps did you know staff behind the counter have targets to hit week by week re the amount of money they turnover and there are bonuses involved with respect to whether they reach their targets or not?

Found that out last week... There you go.

Don't line someone else's pocket man. Least of all someone who doesn't give a s**t about you. Spend it on you and your loved ones.

 

This post was modified 4 years ago by signalman
 
Posted : 19th November 2019 1:50 pm
signalman
(@signalman)
Posts: 1199
 

Come to think of it, I have seen from your previous profile photo that you've quite the baby face so perhaps she was just checking your ID to see if you've got hairs on your chest ?? if so, take it as a compliment and she is off the hook ?

 
Posted : 19th November 2019 1:57 pm
 Boro
(@boro)
Posts: 974
Topic starter
 

Yeah I realised when they kept looking over I knew it was only a matter of time before she came over. Like you said they did there jobs properly I’m pleased nobody was close by like. Yeah I am pretty young looking..... not. Lol 

 
Posted : 20th November 2019 7:44 pm
 Boro
(@boro)
Posts: 974
Topic starter
 

Well I have gambled ffs. Winning then losing the lot and a little bit more. Financially it ain’t going to hurt to much. But it’s the thought I have done it. £450 down the drain. I only stopped when I went to counter to put some money on the machine and she twigged that I was bared a bit late to be kicking me out but it’s me own fault. So what do I do then I go to another betting shop which I’m bared from but the same company as the one I have just been in. I hardly get threw the door and I’m kicked out she said we believe your bared it’s obvious the lass in previous shop had phoned and warned. How f&@king embarrassing and feel so low even tho like I said I can take loss just not my mental state. That £450 could have bought my daughter a pc but no what do I do chuck it away on a stupid f&@king machine!!!!!!!!! When Will I ever learn 

 
Posted : 4th December 2019 6:42 pm
 Boro
(@boro)
Posts: 974
Topic starter
 

Another block done. Blocked all gambling transactions on cards. Took me a while to work out how to do it but it’s another block in place. I can take it off easy tho that’s the problem. Why only have to give 24 hours notice to knock it off doesn’t make any sense like but it’s a block 

 
Posted : 4th December 2019 8:48 pm
 Boro
(@boro)
Posts: 974
Topic starter
 

Going to work now and I feel like s**t. After yesterday embarrassment 

 
Posted : 5th December 2019 7:31 am
S.A
 S.A
(@s-687)
Posts: 4883
 

Hi Boro... sorry to hear whats happened but remember that the really s**t feelings do tend to pass within 48 hours. I often find that its when we start to forget the carnage that gambling has caused that we start to become vulnerable

But you have strength of character and you will dust yourself down and carry on. Its a lapse, nothing more.

All the best mate

 
Posted : 5th December 2019 11:47 am
 Boro
(@boro)
Posts: 974
Topic starter
 

What I can’t understand is how do we convince ourselves that it’s a good idea to gamble. We know the s**t it causes but we still do it. 

 
Posted : 5th December 2019 12:03 pm
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