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Everything Lost & Now I start Again  

 
Peter200
(@peter200)

Well this really is day One. After 25 years of gambling. Which has cost me hundreds of thousands of pounds but worse many relationships. Many of which I cannot recover. I have hit a low that really unless I address it then I cannot live any life. So today for the first time I admitted that unless I seek help and speak about my isssues I will be handcuffed by this addiction forever. Anyway I write this today because even for everything I have lost I know that I can still be a good person. And I want to come back and say how I have not gambled in 5, 10, 30 and hopefully 100 days. If I could get to a 100 days that would be a massive achievement for me. Any help/ ideas & support I would appreciate.Thank You.

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Posted : 7th December 2018 12:07 am
Jappy
(@jappy)

Hi peter well done!! That’s the best decision you will make, to give up one thing and start living everything else my history of gambling sounds similar to your story it’s a one day at a time process. Put as many barriers in you way, give you finances over to someone else who you can trust, how did you gamble online? Blocking software / self exclusion / tear up cr cards / get a small limit on a dr card. Practical thing stopping you doing it when you get the urge! Also don’t forget to enjoy the thought they won’t get another £1 off you today! Keep posting GA meetings can help. Stay safe a gf !

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Posted : 7th December 2018 12:19 am
Peter200
(@peter200)

Yes online mainly. I have done the GamCare self exclusion. Agreed re the money that they won’t get another pound off me. I have already lost everything financially but also from a personal perspective a lot so that now I owe it to myself but also my family to stop. If I do not now then I don’t know where I go. Thank you for responding. I am going to post each day as a discipline to beat this.

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Posted : 7th December 2018 12:27 am
Sean1
(@sean1)

Hi peter

The only advice I can give is knuckle down, concentrate, get angry if necessary, don’t even get tempted to gamble and the gamble free days will take care of themselve. Read my diary on the Allen Carr rules on gambling, it’s a game changer for me.

Shaun

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Posted : 7th December 2018 10:28 am
Forum admin
(@forum-admin)
Admin

Hi Peter200,

Welcome to the forum, and thanks for sharing your gambling issues with us. Gamcare is ready to support you to overcome your gambling problem, and I see that some forum members have already come to your aid, and have suggested some good strategies for you to try/ follow.

25 years of gambling is a very long time, and like you admitted, you’ve lost so much, and it has cost you loads of money and relationships.

You can do it if you put the necessary strategies into practice, and be strict with yourself in handling money – try and block yourself from having easy access to your own money. You can let a close family member or friend that you trust to take care of your finances, and until such time that you feel well recovered to manage your finances again.

How about calling our free phone Helpline on: 0808 8020 133, and then you can speak on 1 to 1 basis with one of our advisers. An adviser can refer you for counselling if that would help with your recovery. Our lines are open everyday from 8.00am to midnight.

Meanwhile, keep reading from our forum for more ideas on strategies to help you overcome your gambling problem, and above all, keep posting!

Best wishes,

Beatrice

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Posted : 7th December 2018 11:11 am
Bobbyj
(@bobbyj)

Hi 200, stay on this site and keep posting, i wish you only the best in your fight to control this addiction, be honest with your self and have the determination and belief in your self that you will never ever be beaten by your gambling addiction. Moving forward keeping one step ahead, guard Up bobbyj / rainman

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Posted : 7th December 2018 3:54 pm
signalman
(@signalman)

Peter

What if I were to posit the theory that you were never a 'bad' person in the first place for gambling all these years, but maybe harbouring a deeper, internal struggle that you have never accepted or acknowledged but never addressed? What is that for you? What was your upbringing like? What significant events have taken place for you in the past?

Don't get me wrong though... At the end of the day you gambled not your past or your foibles! Take ownership of that but also at the same time don't beat the s**t out of yourself unnecessarily as gambling thrives on low self-esteem and self-loathing.

Get to the bottom of why you have been gambling and confront it head on. It's not a mystery illness... It's the bi-product of a deeper malaise in my opinion. First and foremost you're a person, remove those labels of 'bad' and 'good' now... Time to wipe the slate clean and start your recovery with a blank canvas. Good luck.

Ps yes get blocks in asap

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Posted : 8th December 2018 1:50 pm
slowlearner
(@slowlearner)

Hi Peter,

Youre not alone i gambled for over 40 years and at the moment im 120 days gamble free. I can honestly say in the last 20 years i never went 1 day without gambling. I contacted Gamcare and Gamstop in August a broken man and have accepted everything offered or suggested to me. Self exclusion, shop exclusion, and counselling and i can honestly say ive never looked back. I also get a lot out of the chatline finding support from others fighting the same addiction.

One of the most important things to realise is no matter how much youve lost youre NEVER gonna win it back sometimes that can be hard for a CG to accept. We have a win then we gamble larger amounts then were back to losing and so we begin the vicious circle of chasing what weve lost creating even more debt and misery. Take my advice and accept everything available to you and you will find peace and become the good person you really are.

Stay Strong and Good Luck

AL

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Posted : 8th December 2018 5:01 pm
Lil30
(@lil30)

Hi Peter, just wondered how you’re getting on?

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Posted : 10th January 2019 8:26 pm
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