I am back to day 1
Self exclusion reinstated for bookies
Mind not clear but it is day 1 and a start. Work is hard at moment and my starting gambling again has made me distracted and therefore struggling as behind.
heres to a new start, I will have a coffee and try and concentrate at work.
have a good day
I am too after only going a week! I just read on another post to say each morning “I am not going to gamble today” so we take it one day at a time! We are where we are but at least we’re not kidding ourselves! I’ve blocked all sites and cut up my cards so it’s my starting position! Guess time to change my ‘ I last gambled’ date! Good luck x
Well done on your start, I have self excluded again today to renew these. It’s a mental game! I have been all over for days/weeks while gambling or thinking about bets instead of work. This morning for an hour or so I struggled- but slowly got into it, and without a trip to bookies I kept at it and was very productive this pm. A glass and wine and food I am feeling great! Here’s to day 2!
So today has been a roller coaster- feeling aggressive and frustrated and piled up work to clear! Self excluded and the tension fell away over the day and by the end I was conciencious and thorough in work! This is a complete change around from “do as little as possible” before rushing off to bookies!
my mental state better !
We’ve got through it!! I’m just trying to keep busy and remembering how casinos must have sold on my data! If they don’t get you one way they’ll get you another but it’s time to fight back! The only thing at the coast is fish & chips and ice cream....far more satisfying! Stay strong @matt692
Well done Matt for saying how it really feels, thanks for sharing your daily feelings, I too had to reset the days I had gambled, was on 29 days, now it’s on 10, each day gets easier than the day before, sometimes we have them urge feelings, we are only human and all on the same journey.
I’m beginning to listen to my body and when it’s saying I need sleep I go, I beginning to be kind to my self.... Fish and chips sounds a perfect way to be kind to yourself.
As explained earlier I was unsettled and restless, I got to past end of work day then got in car, set off nowhere to buy got out had a drive round and ended up at a cash point near a bookies and drew out the cash and then as I set off in car back to bookies I got to a xroods on the rood left to bookies and right to the pub. As I pulled up I made a decision **** it go and have a beer with Andy! So that what i did, a couple of pints and .............. I came hone still gamble free for 2 days! I had a good chat, I also paid for a weekend away, and still have some cash from cahppint - if I had turned left - I wouldn’t have been on here, gf and looking forward to a day off tomorrow!!
i haven’t missed anything by the decision if anything all good
Well done Matt, that's some amazing will power there and you should be proud of yourself. I have found working from home especially hard the last few weeks and this led me to gamble. I have now put together a plan for paying off debts per month and can see a way forward to paying them off. I'm finding visiting the forum daily helps too. Just need to focus on making me feel better now and having things to look forward to.
The last couple of days my mind has settled, not much thinking about gambling, but still struggling to concentrate and be productive at work! The two are connected but also I think lockdown is in there as well causing some lack of clarity between home and work!
weekend I will do some catch up on work!