Never learn

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(@leesalute)
Posts: 5
Topic starter
 

I felt the need to sign up because I clearly do have a problem. I have only been gambling the last year starting with the online slots spending about 20 a month and when I lost it was no problem. I started roulette and was really lucky with small amounts and then it started creeping up. I have had about 5 occasions where I have gone from *** to making out my credit cards and overdrafts and betting with money I do not have. I have had some very scary experiences and the last time I thought I had learnt my lesson I lost *k and on lay day put my whole wage and then won and bet that on another colour and got my money back a tiny bit more. I thought that was the end. Last night something can over me and I bet * I lost it and within 10 minutes I don’t another 2 bets loosing *K all money that isn’t mine just over drafts. I went to bed unable to sleep, sick to my stomach, anxiety, tossing and turning and really emotional. I woke up this morning with the attitude that I will sort this I’ll just work and slowly pay it off. During my journey to work one of my accounts said I was eligible for a *k loan instantly. I thought this is a sign and like a absolute idiot I got the loan bet it all on one thinking it’s gonna be fine I’ll pay all my stuff off and it lost! I have never felt like such a idiot and stuck with what to do. In my head I knew not to do it but something just comes over me and I black out until reality hits and it’s lost. I’m now in a really bad position and just don’t see a way out of this   

This topic was modified 5 years ago by Forum admin
 
Posted : 19th July 2019 7:32 am
Tnsk
 Tnsk
(@tnsk)
Posts: 78
 

Hi Lee,

You’ve taken the first step to stopping by coming on here, that shows you want to stop and you need to how important that is that you’ve realised you don’t want gambling in your life anymore. Is a massive step.

I know what your going through, the guilt, anxiety etc we all feel and it really is just one day at a time. I lost my money twice and still did it a 3rd time so i’m not gonna lie and say it’s easy to stop. I’ve finally put blocks in place on my phone/laptop so I can’t access betting sites, talking to people on here and the gam care counsellors really does help. YOUR NOT AlONE. Remember that. I just stopped again 2 weeks ago and just being honest with yourself about the problem and getting help is all you can do. Look after yourself and get help from loved ones and we can all fight this addiction together, hoping we both and all never gamble again.

This post was modified 5 years ago by Tnsk
 
Posted : 19th July 2019 3:11 pm
(@spendlikewater84)
Posts: 108
 

Totally relate.  Hang in there 

 
Posted : 19th July 2019 4:13 pm
Joydivider
(@joydivider)
Posts: 2156
 

Hi

You are not alone as we know the feelings you are experiencing. We have lived through it so can advise that there is a way out for you with abstention and a full recovery.

Its a complex drug addiction and indeed an illness. You need to be ready to face this head on with a real born again moment.

Your goal is a serenity and peace with yourself. You dont need gambling in your life. 

At the moment you are not in control of your own mind. It controls you.

Gambling is NOT an income scheme and its NOT a get it back later scheme. For that it would have to be reliable and it is not. Its simply chance based on the odds against you. Odds well against you. You are dealing with a devious industry with a licence to print money.  They have a capital base with everything carefully calculated. They arent risking everything they have...You are!

You cant tell me that cold sweating in your bed is a lifestyle. It is already and will completely destroy you. sleeping on it and forming desperate plans is not the way. This addiction will take you down and down much further

You need to stop now and that means handing all control of your money away and getting serious help. You know its killing you. Are you ready to do the right thing now because your willpower alone will not be enough.

Best wishes from everyone on the forum

 

 
Posted : 19th July 2019 7:51 pm
(@leesalute)
Posts: 5
Topic starter
 

Thank you all, it’s a relief just to be able to voice what’s happened and how I’m feeling to people that understand. 

I came clean to my family today as a step to never do this again. It didn’t go to well they can’t see how it’s an addiction and cannot be controlled. Is this something that family’s grow to understand? 

 
Posted : 19th July 2019 9:28 pm
Tnsk
 Tnsk
(@tnsk)
Posts: 78
 

It’s hard for family to understand at first. People who haven’t had a gambling addiction it’s hard to understand how it can take control of your life. They will in time come to terms with it, and they’ll always be there for you along your journey to recovery.

Your doing the right thing, stay strong mate.

 
Posted : 19th July 2019 9:48 pm
Pdbrowny
(@pdbrowny)
Posts: 4
 

It’s the same for me my wife doesn’t understand she just says don’t do it or why do you have to do it, iv said it’s like being hungry and having a meal in front of you and being told you can’t eat it 

 
Posted : 20th July 2019 7:18 pm
(@gary-1969)
Posts: 16
 

I'm at the same stage my friend.  Told my wife about my problem, she doesn't seem to understand...  I'm 50 and still cant understand how it took a hold of me.... put blocks in place and get help,  show your family that you are serious and are really trying to kick this nasty disease

Take care,  be strong

Gary

 
Posted : 8th August 2019 1:46 am

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