Support us

I'm only 19 and already feel done  

 
Differ5k
(@differ5k)

Hello,

This is my first post in this forum as I can't fall asleep at 05:00 AM. 

This month I received my third wage since starting to live away from my family. It was that of around €1000, it's pretty good for a country like mine.

However, to put into perspective, back when I lived in UK i took 2 loans of £500 each and I still havent paid them back since around February. I keep ignoring their phone calls as well. It used to scare me real bad, but you kinda get used to them. I spent the entire money on Sports betting. This was when I was still living with my parents and they don't know about it. Since I was full time Employed, they did notice that I was short on cash a tad too often though.

Despite that, I somewhat managed to save up before moving. That didn't last long. I spent my first days in the new country drinking with friends, and that's when it happened. I spent every single penny on gambling. I had no money to pay for rent, or anything to be honest. 

I somehow fooled my Dad into thinking I had the money stuck in one of my Bank accounts and I needed to borrow some money until then.

Skipping a few months until this week. I received my pay, with the numbers I said at the start, and I thought of how to spend the money; how much on my insanely-sized-for-a-19-year-old debts, the rent, the bills, the food for the month, traveling expenses. 

It was a good plan. Very balanced. In fact, i'd have some left over. Some left overs I do have. Without spending any of the money on what I planned. My entire wage went into some of the Esports bets. I had made the money back at one point, but the bookie wouldn't let me withdraw over the weekend..

I hate the fact that I feel like I'm really good at betting just because I'm good at the game and I understand what's going on. 

I have rent to pay due next week. My debts to this day still are unpaid. I hope this is the place where I can whine without being told to shut up, and any advice whatsoever would mean the world to me.

So, that's my life, and I don't feel good. I don't wanna feel like this ever again. I really hope I can be proud of myself once I get over this.

Thank you for reading. It wasn't so bad to write this.

This topic was modified 4 weeks ago by Differ5k
Quote
Posted : 15th July 2020 2:59 am
Joydivider
(@joydivider)

Hi differ5K and welcome to the forum.

Firstly you are not alone with this and we do understand because we have been there.

There is no shame in admitting to a problem with gambling or an addiction. Honesty and openness are your saviours. If you can talk to your family please tell them....secrets are no good for you....you need help like we all did and you cant do this alone

You aim is a peace of mind and a pride to face your life and your debts. You can get out of this if you enter a full monitored recovery to stop gambling. You will be able to pick up the phone and face your debts...remember that they have to accept a small amount after your living expenses...they will be glad to be getting something and they may have to freeze interest. Facing life and facing reality will build a pride....you can only pay whats is affordable

Get some financial advice from the citizens advice bureau who are very helpful.

There is a future for you if you stop now. You can build a rainy day fund and you will be amazed how much more freedom with money that gives you.

Dont make any plans until you have the born again moment of telling someone who could help monitor your money. You have to treat it more like a drug addiction and do the cold turkey on a strict living allowance

The gambling dens have not really set up something you can be clever at. They have teams of people making sure the odds are against "Clever betters" and it remains a random event. Nobody is offering life changing odds on the only four legged horse in the race. Gambling is not an income scheme and it was never there to top up your wages. Once addicted and its easy to become addicted, gambling becomes less about the money and more about that hit of having a go

Take on some overtime...do some study..see if anyone has a second job for you...those are money making schemes.

Take pride on living within your means...you can build up a cushion and realise that you dont need many things they try and persuade you to buy.

Best wishes from everyone on the forum

ReplyQuote
Posted : 15th July 2020 8:54 am
JohnMac
(@johnmac)

Hi differ,

Your age is a massive advantage you hold. So much time to get yourself right in life. Don't mistake being young as a problem, it is a great gift for you right now. Too many are older before knowing the real problems.

All the best to you.

ReplyQuote
Posted : 15th July 2020 11:13 am
Pete123
(@pete123)

Hi Differ5K

I hear you.

Firstly, may I congratulate you for having the wisdom to speak out and ask for help. I wish I had done that whilst I was young. Unfortunately I did not address my gambling problem until I reached my 40's and by that time I had lost approximately 150k through gambling. Please don't make the mistake that I and countless others have made. 

Draw a line under the loss, except that it has gone; it is tempting to think you can win it back, but sadly chasing losses leads to even further losses; which in turn leads down a road of destruction.

I am not sure what country that you are currently living in, but if you could find a GA (gamblers anonymous) meeting to attend, you would find it highly rewarding listening to the experience of others, and like on this forum, you'll find people will want to support you and by no means judge you. (at the moment a lot of GA meetings are done via 'Zoom' due to venues being closed due to the current pandemic).

On this forum, you will find a lot of friendly advice and support. I hope you manage to log back in regular. Remember your not alone.

Kind regards, Pete123

 

 

This post was modified 4 weeks ago by Pete123
ReplyQuote
Posted : 16th July 2020 12:51 am
Frankie77
(@frankie77)

Hi mate. I am also 19 and have a gambling problem. Since lockdown I have lost over £10,000. Pretty much all the money I had saved up. I put up a post a few weeks ago feel free to give it a read. I still haven’t spoken to anybody about it and currently am feeling really down about my gambling. I tried to stop so many times but even like tonight I have just wasted another £400. If you need somebody to chat to please let me know it could be beneficial to both of us. 

ReplyQuote
Posted : 26th July 2020 3:07 am
Forum admin
(@forum-admin)
Admin

Differ5k

Good morning Differ, it's been a couple of weeks since your post and I was wondering how things were going and if there was any further support we could offer you?  It would be great to get up an update on your current situation. 

@Frankie77

Thank you for your post, I was sorry to read that you have been struggling with lockdown and have lost your savings. I do understand how difficult it can be to speak to someone, but I was wondering whether you've had the opportunity to talk to an Adviser? If not I do recommend that you call our HelpLine on 0808 8020 133 or you try our NetLine if you find it easier to type rather than talk. 

They are available 24/7 to offer support, understanding and can help you put tools in place to help you to stop gambling.  

Kind regards

ChrisK 

Forum Admin

 

This post was modified 2 weeks ago 2 times by Forum admin
ReplyQuote
Posted : 26th July 2020 10:37 am
Share this page
Share
  
Working

Please Login or Register