£7k down in a night

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signalman
(@signalman)
Posts: 1199
 

It's all about addressing your gambling addiction now brother - it's not about covering s**t up anymore ✌️

Youre probably feeling like you will never gamble again... Those feelings are all-encumbasing at the moment and will see you through for a period of time but will only get you so far, eventually much time will pass and your life will regain some stability... Those feelings will pass and unless you've actually done s**t in the interim period you'll be vulnerable again.

If nothing changes nothing changes.

Get cooking my friend.

Take care

This post was modified 5 years ago 4 times by signalman
 
Posted : 9th July 2019 11:25 pm
(@bananaz)
Posts: 27
Topic starter
 

Thank you all. I am wide awake, heart thumping, and I won't be sleeping tonight. I accept what you say and I'm powerless to fight this alone.

Tomorrow is the beginning of a new me. Hopefully with my partner by my side, time will tell.

This post was modified 5 years ago by Bananaz
 
Posted : 9th July 2019 11:51 pm
(@addictben)
Posts: 7
 

Surely your partner will see the 7k on the statement next time she logs in. I think you're best off telling her before she finds out. 

 
Posted : 10th July 2019 9:41 am
gadaveuk
(@gadaveuk)
Posts: 1725
 

Hi

Once I put a lot of time and effort in to my recovery and handed over all of my finances and started to abstain my recovery was going to become much easier.

The money was just the fuel for my addiction.

Money was never going to heal me or heal the people I hurt.

I Have seen many people swap addictions or taken up obsessions instead of healing the inner child in them.

I did not respect myself and I did not respect money.

I have been to eleven counselors and given such in depth therapies that nearly every corner of my life has been exposed.

Only when I valued myself could I value other people.

All the time I was in my pains and hiding my pains I could not love my self or love other people.

At what point would I admit to myself that in me I had hurt inner child.

I stuck with my recovery putting more and more time and effort in to finding peace with in myself.

Just for today I will not gamble. It is a boundary I set for myself to no longer live in fear and escape and to not hurt myself any more.

The gambling were places I went to escape when I was emotional vulnerable and could not cope with people life and situations.

Please keep going to meetings, you will benefit from it in so many ways.

Love and peace to every one.

Dave L

AKA Dave of Beckenham

 
Posted : 10th July 2019 11:31 am
(@bananaz)
Posts: 27
Topic starter
 

Thanks Dave.

Yeah she found out. Went to an ATM for a statement, saw everything. Text me to ask if it was true, I said it was, and now she's ignoring my texts and calls.  That was three hours ago.

Going to find my nearest GA meeting tonight.

 

 

 

 
Posted : 10th July 2019 1:57 pm
gadaveuk
(@gadaveuk)
Posts: 1725
 

Hi

Shirley my wife told me that the pain I was causing her was not about the money it was the lies and betrayals.

It took me some time to learn to feel my pains, only then could I feel for others.

I went to meetings for my wife first of all it did not work out well for me.

Only when I was in the meetings for myself.

Only when I set boundaries just for today I will not gamble.

By attending meeting I would understand when I felt vulnerable and how to cope with my emotional urges.

The recovery program has very little to do about luck, it has every thing to do about my healthy motivated actions and my healthy motivated words.

The recovery program will help you help your self.

Please keep going to meetings, you will benefit from it in so many ways.

Love and peace to every one.

Dave L

AKA Dave of Beckenham

 
Posted : 10th July 2019 2:04 pm
signalman
(@signalman)
Posts: 1199
 
Posted by: Bananaz

Going to find my nearest GA meeting tonight.

Top man. Good move ?

Go for you and for no-one else.

Let us know how it went.

You can get through this ??

 

 
Posted : 10th July 2019 2:59 pm
(@bananaz)
Posts: 27
Topic starter
 

She's told me she can't be with me just now. I can understand that. I'm ashamed to say I gambled again last night, not a huge amount. Just thought I might get lucky. I didn't. 

 
Posted : 11th July 2019 5:47 pm
(@bananaz)
Posts: 27
Topic starter
 

I did better tonight. Had a small bet, won a small amount and just walked away. In the past I wouldn't have done that. I know I have a long way to go but I feel it's a step in the right direction. 

 
Posted : 11th July 2019 9:32 pm
(@Anonymous)
Posts: 0
 

I did better cause i had a small bet.

It won so congratulations. Shall i get a medal engraved for you

I am struggling to identify why you are here as it appears you have no intention on dealing with your addiction.

Gambling v trying to get your partner back. At present there appears a clear favourite.

 

 

 

 
Posted : 11th July 2019 10:37 pm
bdog
 bdog
(@bdog)
Posts: 305
 

Stop gambling dude.

Its tough, but can be done. Small steps, but step one is commit to trying. Get your blocks in place. 

 
Posted : 12th July 2019 12:43 am
(@bananaz)
Posts: 27
Topic starter
 

Managed to not gamble so far today. Spoke to my partner and she says we can talk but the only way we have a future is if I hand over all bankcards to her and she will check transactions every day. I also have to commit to putting a high percentage of my wage towards what I lost.

I'm not sure if she's even being reasonable. But I am determined to overcome this so I'll do what she says. 

 
Posted : 12th July 2019 12:26 pm
(@Anonymous)
Posts: 0
 

Hi,

Under your current circumstances i think she is being entirely reasonable and is trying to help you.

Mrs Bal did the same to me and it lasted just over 9 months. You learn to live with the scrutiny and not having readies on you.

In reality it is a big block which can help the gambling cycle to be broken allowing you to focus on the addiction.

All in all a good start and good news.

Stay strong and no gambles today

 
Posted : 12th July 2019 2:53 pm
(@bananaz)
Posts: 27
Topic starter
 

The gambling is out of control now,  25kI'm over in credit card/loan debt. Not sure why I'm even posting here but told guys I'd keep them up to date. 

 
Posted : 15th July 2019 6:08 pm
degenerate
(@degenerate)
Posts: 479
 

Stop now, get help. You will only get deeper in a financial mess. 

 

 
Posted : 15th July 2019 6:56 pm
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