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StuckInTheGame
(@stuckinthegame)

Hi, I've never posted on a forum before but I can't stop worrying. I'm 19 and yesterday I lost about £850 trying to chase some losses in football. 

Luckily I don't have to worry about bills or rent and still have money in my accounts, however the sheer amount and having some family members that would be disappointed and angry at me if they found out has kept me up all night...

Please tell me it gets better and that £850 can easily be made back by working once I get a full time job.. I'm constantly having thoughts of 'one last £500' to chase the last loss... 

Thanks for hearing my story 

Quote
Posted : 15th July 2020 9:24 am
MythDunk
(@mythdunk)

IT GETS BETTER!

I lost £2.5K in 30 minutes my friend about a month ago and I was there with you, the stress and anxiety, the wish to turn back time, the gut wrenching feeling of stupidity....

You are in the danger zone at the moment of not quite having convinced yourself that the losses have gone. There is still a small part of you that is wondering whether you could yet risk more cash to recover the losses. Please do not do it.

The quickest way to start your journey of recovery both psychological and financial is also the hardest way, and that is to accept them. Accept you made an awful and costly mistake. Accept you were stupid. Human but stupid! Let it go.

As each day passes and the gap between you losing the cash to where you are now increases it becomes a little bit easier to accept. With each day that goes by you will also gain some clarity in realizing how out of control you were during that short period when every decision you were making was a bad choice and your money flooded from your account into a bookie account (a bookie who really didn't need the cash like you did but who aren't a charity and won't give it back to you).

So I would say this is the point you really need to stay firm, DO NOT chase anymore because your losses as they are now will quickly increase if you chase and get into further difficulty. Fight through the next few days where you will feel physically sick about the cash you've lost...and I promise within a few days you'll notice it is getting easier to cope with the loss and move on with your life.

You are young, you are not in debt (stay that way), and every time you go to sleep over the next week and can say at the end of the day that you didn't bet, what you're really saying is you didn't put yourself at risk of losing substantially more cash. Imagine for a minute how you would feel if you'd chased and lost another grand...then congratulate yourself that you avoided that scenario and sleep well that night!

 

 

 

ReplyQuote
Posted : 15th July 2020 11:18 am
Muststop123
(@muststop123)

Hi StuckInTheGame

Well it can it better but only if you stop now, for good. If you stop now you can put that £850 down as an expensive lesson in life and move on. The pain of the lost money will reduce over time and at some point in the not so distant future you may be able to look back and realise you actually dodged a bullet -  it could have been so much worse.

If you continue, then based on the experience of the many on this forum, things will get a lot worse very quickly. I do not think age really has anything to do with problem gambling (I waited until I was 48 to have a problem) but the number of new young people of similar age to you coming on here who have lost all their savings and run up big debts is horrifying - trying to start off in life with that amount of additional debt and stress is no way to enjoy your life.

I do not know how you gambled but my best advice is to block your ability to gamble - if it was online then get excluded via Gamstop and if in physical bookies then find out about SENSE. I know at the moment you are just thinking that the best thing to do is just decide not to gamble but willpower is usually not enough once you have shown you have a problem with gambling and lets be honest if you are chasing losses and have searched for a website about problem gambling, you know deep down you have a problem.

You'll make your own decisions but I suggest you read a few of the diaries and intro posts on here. They might make you think again.

Take care

Muststop123

ReplyQuote
Posted : 15th July 2020 12:02 pm
Chris.UK
(@chris-uk)

@stuckinthegame

It's always interesting to read these type of posts, young gamblers like yourself reeling over the loss of some money. Like most interests it costs money to take part. £50 or so to go and watch a footie match or £20 for a decent game of golf. It's the same with gambling, be it £2 a spin on a machine or a £20 accumulator on a Saturday. If you budget and can afford the bet, regardless of win or lose carry on. Put some restrictions in place but assume that you'll lose whatever you gamble with.

If you find yourself chasing losses, that's the time to look at your behaviour. The longer you gamble the worse an addiction will become, so if you don't like the idea of getting worse or losing more money now would be a very good time to call it a day on your gambling. 

If you find yourself unable to stop there are a lot of ways to block yourself but only you know how you feel. I hope you can think honestly about your gambling and know whether or not it is a problem and act accordingly.

Good luck to you.

Chris.

ReplyQuote
Posted : 15th July 2020 1:11 pm
Kevthekev40
(@kevthekev40)

Hiya stuckinthegame

I feel for you and that feeling you've got in the pit of your stomach that's kept you up all night,  if I can get anything to stick in your mind its that feeling as when you feel that and remember your loss that will save you a lot off money in the future. Because my friend if you gamble that's how you'll feel most off your life. If you can put your losses down to that and I know its a lot but you'll lose thousands going on if you bet and continue on to be a problem gambler,  I'm not saying you won't win but I will a sure you if you don't put it down to the past and it's gone you'll end up like most of us on here thousands in debt, broken families, a life off he'll, stay away from the gambling company's and your money will be your. You won't ever have to stay up all night as you've thousands and don't know how your going to feed your family or lose your house. Your only 19yrs old and if YOU learn this lesson with the evil addiction off gambling then what you lost last night is a small price to pay. I hope you don't take me wrong as in 1hr not so long ago I lost nearly  £8000 and I only intended to bet £10 just don't want to think off you making mistakes like most of us on this site, I wish you well and a gamble free life one you deserve 

ReplyQuote
Posted : 15th July 2020 5:46 pm
StuckInTheGame
(@stuckinthegame)

Thank you all so much for your responses and convincing me that if I quit now, it'll be a small loss in comparison to if I continued. 

I can't say I feel much better though, It's the only thing on my mind and I feel so stupid.. hopefully this will go away over time right?

Anyways thanks a lot for your responses it means a lot to know atleast I'm not alone 

 

ReplyQuote
Posted : 15th July 2020 6:08 pm
Pete123
(@pete123)

Dear StuckInTheGame

You have had some great advice here, and I second what has been said.

It's OK to feel the way uou are at the moment. Take a deep breath and imagine how you would feel in 20 years time, having lost £150.000... It happened to me; it could happen to you. You have lost £850 you understand how horrible it has made you feel. Try to think how lucky you are right now, having reached out for help and nipping it in the bud, before your gambling spirals out of control and ruins your life.

I really wish you the best.

Pete123

 

ReplyQuote
Posted : 16th July 2020 4:46 am
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