Hi kev hope you are ok. I'm so excited off to the shop to get cricket kit. My boy is in the county cricket team on Tuesday !!!!!
Where's my buddy? You ok kev ?
Once again kev I've posted for you on my thread, don't you to think I haven't replied . Silly me again !!
Hiya all
Just thought I'd write a few words as I've not been to good with my mental health at moment. Things at home are still up and down so I know that doesn't help me much, I'm still in the stage that I hate the gambling company's and it really annoys me how I allow them to effect me in the past the way they have. I find myself thinking alot about my last loss as for me it's the biggest to date plus the one that's caused most damage to my family and my own mental health. I believe I'm too impulsive and I've put things in place to limit that impulse, I know theirs ways round banning yourself from place and betting full stop but I also think if I get the impulse to gamble again by the time I'd manage to find someway off gambling the impulse would've went! Well that's the way I think it will go at the moment. So with that in mind I feel secure having that information in my head as it always worried me if I was to relapse I could always find away to gamble, but I know with being a problem gambler that I can go 1 to 2yrs gamble free then have the impulse to gamble and that's when the damage is down, I suppose we will have to wait and see as I've always said that I can't say I'll never gamble again as said this to many times in the past fooling myself into believing I had it all under control as I know that my problem is I'll never have it under control so that's why I take it one day at a time , even if I went 10yrs without gambling I'd still have a problem as it's that onetime that causes massive damage and havoc. What a horrible way for us to self harm it's so bad an addiction it can even leave us with the thoughts off taken our life. The most important thing we have, I'm really happy that I've found this site as I know we all have things at different stages but at the same time we're all the same and help each other out with our experiences and it's just good to have you all who's helped me some of you know who you are plus others who don't know as I've read there story and what they've achieved so to everyone on the site thanks for being you and thanks for the honesty you've put a cross as everyone is someone and we're all in this together
Keep going kev...... I'm behind you pushing . Take care
I know that Charlieboy
You've always been there for me and vice a versa the only way is forward, we've both learned that. One day at a time my friend
Sorry you’ve had a bad few days Kev but it’s just like you to start like that and finish your post being so positive for everyone! I understand entirely why you are still 5inking of that last loss. Just keep working at making it the very last loss you’ll ever experience.
Thanks mythedunk
Things haven't been great my friend but I guess we all have times like that and We just have to get past it and just remember tomorrow's another day and as you say making it my last loss will help me through this hell whole, life is hard at moment but I know we can all make it through as without that belief We wouldn't be on this site trying our hardest to improve our life going forward not back, thanks again mythedunk and take care
Hi kev sounds like you are a little bit better today I'm glad. I told my son today and he was awesome about it all. The only thing that made him angry was that I hadn't told him before and that he had been worried I was dying he barely skipped a beat when I told him that I was trying my best to recover from a gambling addiction. I feel v humbled by him today. I said that I know there will be questions and from now on I will be open and honest with him and he can ask me anything. Let's keep going now kev we can do this
Hey kev I'm good ty been to cricket with son and husband every day. They are trying to cram the season in. It's helping massively with my mental health out and about outdoors and with other parents most of whom I really like. Over last week me and hubby are making progress working on us it actually feels good. U sound ok in your posts, so hope you are. Catch up soon
Hey kev u doing ok ? How did your call with gp go? So many new people on here every day !! I always try to post for new people can't keep up so many. Me and hubby are trying, I have told him that no more lying means no more lying when he's upset me/been out of order so we will see , I'm keeping an open mind. My son knowing makes things easier as it was killing me covering things up with him when I'm getting away from lying being secretive etc. He humbled me kev when he found out that I wasn't dying he was so relieved he barely skipped a beat about the gambling. I have told him from now on that I will openly discuss anything with him. His only question was is our house safe, as soon as I told him 100% yes like a typical young person, " ok I'm good " how are things for you at home ? The thing is kev guilt and shame keeps us stuck in the cycle ,can't keep saying sorry, at some stage things have to move on. Speak soon take care
Hi kev. I'm thinking positive that the doctor is going to help my mate on monday. Take care and I'll post again before monday. Gamble free is good !!
Kev u never need to apologise to me ok , as long as you're ok. I'm hoping the psychiatrist can help make things a bit better for you. Take care of yourself my mate
Hi kev hope you're ok. Just wanted to say hello I'm out today watching guess what..... Cricket lol. So won't be on full tonight. If I don't catch you later I hope the doctor can help you tomorrow I'll be rooting for you.
Hiya all
Just thought I would update my post as I've not been to great lately so not been on people's story giving input. Well things have been really hard as I've not felt myself over the past week, don't get me wrong I've not wanted to gamble I've just felt that my head isn't in the right place. If that makes sense. I've made some good friends on this site and you know who you are but ive just not had it in me to correspond. I've not been sleeping and just feel that I'm not here as life is in limbo, I just want everyone to know that I'm still thinking of you all but just not at a stage where I feel what I've got to say Will help anyone. I've got an appointment with my sychiatrist tomorrow so hopefully we can tweet my medication and I can start to be myself again. So if I've not replied to you it's just down to the way I am so hope to be back on site with some input soon, take care everyone
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