RE: I cant stop please help me people

I've replied to your post on my diary x

You are not a bad person. Reach out to your parents, tell them what you are going through, tell them you need their support and help, they will be relieved you told them. You are not alone. Call to get a counseling and call GA just to talk to someone you understands what you are going through. Beginning to talk about it will help. Being honest with those who love you will begin to make you feel better about yourself and ask them to help you get support.
a great support is the online smart recovery community. You can stop, but you need support. Therapy can be so helpful to deal with the feelings that contribute to make you want to gamble. Shame and self loathing is so hard to deal with and it can keep you from feeling love and support. Keep writing here also. I will be thinking of you and hoping that you will post again and wish you the courage to begin talking to your loved ones.

Write about your stressful situation. Share what you are going through.

Am so sorry how you feel , I know myself its so hard am at same stage too I feel so low at times. You've got to just try think positive things can get better if you make small changes in your life. I would say get counselling it will help to get things off your chest and also say to your parents. Things won't happen over nice but take it one day at a time .  But you know gambling won't help you at all so it has to stop 

God will forgive you but only you can make the changes. Set deposit limits or self exclude. The tools are there, you just need to use them. 

You aren't a bad person. You're unwell. But now that you can acknowledge that, you can start to take back control of your life. 

GamStop can block you from most reputable online casinos. Gamban can block access to gambling websites on your device, and you can get it free in the UK. You can also put blocks on your debit and credit cards.

If you're gambling in person, not online, self exclude from your local bookmakers and casinos. But ultimately, you need willpower.

Look into the Gamechange course offered by Gamcare. This is an online CBT course with a personal counsellor. It helped me a lot.

Hi Needtostop,

I have read your post and I sympathise with your situation. I used to gamble daily but last week I celebrated two years gamble free. I was in a mess and now I’m not. The wonderful thing about life is that tomorrow is another opportunity to start over.

You mentioned that you have past trauma and stress. That will always be part of your history and it may be horrendous but I honestly believe that we can start afresh at any point with a positive attitude and with mental strength and it doesn’t need to be your future. Dump all the rubbish of yesterday and start afresh tomorrow. 

When I decided to stop gambling for good I looked at all the other aspects of my life. I didn’t feel healthy or particularly fit. I didn’t eat well. I didnt sleep well or enough. I was stressed, I was angry I never switched off and rarely relaxed. I opted to change all of this. Its a snowball effect and one change leads to another and life improves. Obviously, with an end to gambling things change by default. Less stress, better sleep however, running changed my life. I got fitter, healthier and less stressed.

The journey never ends but in a good way. I still eat rubbish too much but everyday set out to be better. I want to read more I really do as part of relaxing and having quiet time but still haven’t gotten to grips with this one but I’ll get there. Nobody is perfect but I’m improving and everyday is a new chance to improve, get better, be happier, healthier and other chance to get myself further away from the broken disaster I was two years ago - a completely broken human with no motivation and little ambition. 

I am healthier, wealthier and happier. That should be enough but there’s loads more to improve. Absolutely loads more that I can do to have a better life. I have choices to make everyday and sometimes I make the easy/lazy choice but sometimes I make the tough necessary choice and that is when things get better. 

I hope you can look at your life as it is today and now. Whatever you don’t like set out to change. You can do it. What’s the consequence of not doing it? Where could you be one year and five years from now. Don’t do whats easy. Do today what makes things better tomorrow. If you are unhappy today do something tomorrow that makes you happy. Do something that equals accomplishment- whatever that is. Make one change and build from there. Good luck

RR

Hi there 

Thank you for your nice reply.  I have messed my life up and have become something that I never wanted to be.

I am a bad person I have done bad things not intentionally but looking back I can see how it looks bad.  I was not gambling at the time when a incident took place. Do you have time one day and I can tell you.  Everything I do in life seems to bad.  I hate myself so much for being dishonest to my parents I asked for money and I gambled it.  What sane person does that.  It is making me into a horrible person its disgusting.  I have people who hate me for the way I have behaved and seems like there is no coming back.  Gambling is the only thing that would take away the pain of what I have been feeling.  I never do it out of greed or anything it just took me to another place.  I don't know what to do  I have no friends have isolated myself and everyone hates me.  

Thank you so much for replying I am female by the way.

Ok hun 

I will take a look.  I am a female gambler and I am disgusted in myself I hate myself. I don't understand why I love the pain of losing as I am not gambling to win I gamble to take my mind of the stressful situation I am in.

Please stay strong and don't gamble it will f**k up your life.  What are we doing to ourselves just for a little buzz it is crazy.

Hi luv,

Thanks for reply.  Yes I have to make small changes.  But I also have to right my wrongs. I have been living in la la since 2015 and the only comfort from being isolated and alone was gambling. I am a bad person and hurt so many people and don't know how I can get them to forgive me.  What do i do? x

I hope god will forgive and will give me a new start in life.  I don't deserve it.  But being dishonest is wrong and makes you look bad.  My character has been ruined forever.. I am frightened to tell my parents.  I can't believe I have been like this what is wrong me I don't know.  Any bit of money I am quick to do online gambling the roulette it is sick.  I am going to repay them but I have to make it up in some other way.  God forgive me i am  going to hell

Hi @needtostop2021  , 

Thank you for your post on the Forum. You are not a bad person but one who is struggling with addiction. As you can see, you do get support on here from those who have been or are going through similar. 

This addiction does not discriminate, it affects all walks of life, genders, ethnicities, classes and ages. You do not have to be alone with it. I am not sure if you have ever spoken to us before but you can do by calling us free on 0808 802 0133 or by our live chat function. We would be happy to listen and advise, and offer you the chance of some free one to one treatment. 

Please do not hesitate to get in touch. 

Be kind to yourself. There is help available 

Best wishes

Keely.

Forum Admin 

Aw Thank you so much for your reply.  Well appreciated.  I am going to change but it is this being dishonest what I can't get my head round why am I doing it.  This gambling addiction has taken so much away from.  My life motivation my self asteem.  I have been through so much trauma and caused trauma on people which I can't forgive myself for and know my behaviours have been bad so why do it. I don't gamble to win or anything I had a stressful situation happen in 2014 with a person did not do the right thing and make me look like a bad person but I was trying to protect myself.  I don't know I have to take responsibility for my actions.  I have hurt people in the past and I am truly sorry.  I have not been a good person at all.  Not thinking about situations it is crazy.  Now I am hurting my family no good person does that it is wrong.  How I have been living is wrong.  I am gonna have to try and find a way to ask these people for forgiveness my mind has not been right for a while.  The trauma I endured when I was 15 sent me on the wrong path to destruction.  But I make the choices so it is all my fault. Trusting the wrong people all sorts has gone.  My life has spiralled out of control and I don't know how to get my life back I doubt I may get it back at all. My character has been ruined and put into question.  I don't want to be this disgusting gambler its trampy and wrong.  I had dreams and ambition that has all gone I am just a b*m with no future.  No friends no nothing just complete isolation.  Where do I start to pick up the pieces in all this.  I am in a sad sad situation.  

Thanks for chatting to me please drop me line when you can.  I have self excluded at most online casino's but one and scared even to shut that down.  Its crazy I am crazy it is not good.

I can't be kind to myself I am dishonest and low life.  That is how the world sees me.

I have hurt so many people.  I just hope one day they can forgive me.  Thank you for your kind words.