My boyfriend has been gambling ever since he started going to watch football games with his mum when he was 13 (he would pick what he wanted to bet and his mum would do it for him) he is now 22 and gambles every single day. Sometimes it’s a small bet such as £2 or even smaller, but other times it can be up to £1000 at a time. He is not struggling financially as of yet, but he seems to have no real concept of money. I’ve told him he has a problem and should get help multiple times but he just changes the subject and says “it’s not that deep”. Am I overthinking it? I just keep thinking about how i’m supposed to move in with him if he keeps doing this. He had asked me to lend him money before but he always gives it back within the hour. I try to speak about it with him and it always ends in an argument and him saying if I have a problem I should leave him. I just don’t know what to do.
Dear Mo2512
Thank you for coming to the forum and sharing your story. I hope you find the space both supportive and informative.
I am sorry to hear that you are going through a difficult time. If you would like to find out more about how we can support both you and your boyfriend, please contact the GamCare Helpline or 0808 8020 133 or Netline, which are both available 24/7.
Best wishes
Sallie
Forum Admin
Your boyfriend is right, if you have a problem you should leave him. And you are do have a problem as you are asking all the right questions about his behaviour and deep down you know the answer. While it seems he has a gambling problem he can only get help if thats is what he wants to do, you cannot force an addict to change their ways no matter how much we want it.
Most people gamble within their means, and dont spend most days thinking about gambling and gambling as often as possible, other distractions like jobs, family, lived ones take second place to our habit. If he was serious about changing you would want to see his gambling accounts and bank accounts etc to see not just how much money he gambles but how much time he spends gambling. This is are true tell tale sign there is a problem.
If he is unwilling to even take a look to see if their is a problem then you should indeed move on in my opinion.
Yes never get involved with a gambler if you want any sort of stability in life.
I am a compulsive gambler and I wouldn't want anything to do with me.
Move on.
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