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Personal dilemma. All options very welcome x  

 
tizzy1970
(@tizzy1970)

Hello, I’m currently on day 9 of being gf. 
I’ve gambled all my life, years ago making a living from it. Fruit machines in bingo halls - these used to pay out on percentages. 
My problem is online gambling. That was out of control. That is what needed addressing. That is what brought me here. 
I am in no doubt I will continue playing bingo at land bingos. I’ve done it for years. It has NEVER caused me any issues and it is an enjoyable pastime. My family enjoy it, as does my OH. 

My dilemma is fruit machines in these bingo halls. As I say, I have played them for 35 years. These have not caused me problems. These did not lead me here. Is there anyone else here that agrees/ sees my point of view that continuing playing land slots isn’t going to jeopardise my obtaining from online. 
I guess even going to bingo I couldn’t call myself (as people do) gamble free. I’d have to be OGF (online gamble free) 

Thanks for taking the time to read this. All opinions welcome T xx

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Posted : 11th June 2021 12:50 pm
Winterishere
(@winterishere)

Ultimately you can do whatever you want. It's your life and you live it how you want. But you're kidding yourself if you think bingo and exposing yourself to the fobts in bingo halls isn't contributing to your addiction. If you can find a way to control you impulses that great but the majority of addicts need to stay away from online gambling sites, arcades, bookies and bingo halls to remain gf.

Good luck

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Posted : 11th June 2021 1:10 pm
Morethanmoney
(@morethanmoney)

From what and how you’ve wrote this, it sounds like you’ve already figured it out. The dilemma might be the addiction.

Many compulsive gamblers enjoy poker for example however when they play sensible stakes at poker it triggers their addiction and they then wander to online higher stakes poker, casinos and betting.

Good luck with whatever you decide!

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Posted : 11th June 2021 2:11 pm
Secret♡
(@secret)

Hi Tizzy, as above its your life and its totally up to you how you approach these bingo hall.

My only worry would be as you have an addiction like us also to online games maybe you will start over compensating the money you would use online into the slots in the bingo hall. 

I personally don't go to bingo or casinos ect but I would imagine i would sit there for hours if I could whereas online the blocks are there to prevent me. 

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Posted : 11th June 2021 5:10 pm
Boo radley
(@boo-radley)

Hello there. I think its a big part of your social life as you say your OH goes so sometimes it's a fear of what else will I do. Are you being  totally honest with yourself.

I was a casino only gambler. Online never drew me. It doesn't now but I just know the more free time and access to machines then I was there. They were the honey. I was the bee.

It's up to you. It's a fine dividing line when does gambling stop being fun..

Do take care. And let us know how you progress

Boo 

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Posted : 11th June 2021 5:20 pm
tizzy1970
(@tizzy1970)

Thanks for the replies. 
I will take it all on board.

I believe I’m being honest with myself. I can see why people would ask that question. 

I will keep you updated. 
Thank you T xx

ReplyQuote
Posted : 11th June 2021 5:32 pm
Loux
 Loux
(@loux)

Hi tizzy i guess it depends individually. Theres the potential as already said that it could escalate and become a problem there especially now that you dont do online gambling. 

Some people may have given up casinos etc but still get the odd lottery ticket. But ultimately it always has the risk of being triggered to spend more will it increase your urges ? Especially if you lost would you want to keep going for a win

Sometimes it can be easy to think oh just one go..or i will only spend a certain amount or i will stop at a certain point but then ive convinced myself before and it caused a relapse.

The land slots may start to give you the same adrenline or feelings as online now you have stopped so please be careful 

Well done on stopping the online gambling though xX 

 

ReplyQuote
Posted : 11th June 2021 11:01 pm
Joydivider
(@joydivider)

Hello Tizzy

The addiction will talk through you as it doesnt want you to stop. What you write there is full of confusion which is understandable...we have all been there.

You mention making a living and percentages. Its a random act in no way associated with planned living. The percentages are meaningless per session for the gambler. Per year the gambling dens take a certain percentage but the punters fight for every misery stained tenner from other punters. It is NOT an income scheme that involves repeat play or any planning

Write down what you have lost and honestly show it to someone close. You need reality checks and you need to decide if you are ready to accept you have an actual problem before moving on.

Its a drug addiction more than anything. Your addiction will be telling you not to listen to Joydivider because you can handle it and its only a flutter

This addiction kills people and it calls at all stations on the way to total destruction. You need to get off the train and that involves abstention and blocks. 

I will accept that there are different triggers but you certainly need to be blocked from online gambling. However can you honestly say that you can continue any form of gambling....you went online for a reason...probably because it was convenient and was giving your biggest drug high...probably because you were a bit bored with your normal gambling and needed a bigger fix

Can you honestly continue with any gambling? Its a mugs game and highly addictive.

Its your decision but you need to learn about the power of this addiction. It becomes less about the money and more about a craving until you realise youve chucked more hard earned money into the wind

Best wishes from everyone on the forum

ReplyQuote
Posted : 14th June 2021 11:40 am
Dre
 Dre
(@dre)

I’m not going to judge, I wish I could have fun gambling but I can’t, what I will say is when I really struggled with online gambling, so I would order my bank card and get a family member to scratch the last three security digits before I seen them.... this helped me massively with online gambling but means you can’t shop online, this is probably terrible advice but it worked for me 

ReplyQuote
Posted : 14th June 2021 8:51 pm
Cfenton81
(@cfenton81)

Hi all, I can really relate to this thread.

Prior to lockdown I had been going to GA and abstained for a good 8 months but as I hadn't been going to meetings I eventually ended up gambling again.

I told my wife that I would only spend five pounds a week on a weekend football coupon only and said I wouldn't fall back into the trap. She wasn't impressed but ultimately said that it's up to you what you do with your money as you are a grown adult but if things get bad again then I'm done.

I therefore started out doing just these five pound bets on a weekend. By the way I registered with gamcare and put in a self exclusion for 5 years about 2 years ago but got around that by getting my mate to put bets on via his account.

Anyway, I wasn't winning so I enticed my friend to go halfs on opening up new accounts in his name and us sharing the cost and bonuses. By this point he had just given me access to his username and passwords so I could pretty much do what I liked.

Thankfully I was sticking to the weekend and five pound bet rule and was making some slight profits by using the free bet offers, etc. This went okay for a few months but then I started gambling more than the five pounds on a weekend and then I broke my own rules by gambling when I was on annual leave from work. This then progressed to gambling whenever I felt the need as I didn't want to miss out on any offers. 

Thankfully I wasn't losing much at all and although I was gambling a lot I was playing pretty sensibly by hedging bets to ensure I got some profit.

However as the months moved on I was noticing that I wasn't winning much at all and although I promised myself I wouldn't go onto online roulette I eventually convinced myself that I would be fine. Big mistake.

All of the money that I had built up over the past year has been blown in a week. I still have about the right amount of money that I should have at this stage in the month but I've decided that my gambling has become uncontrollable once again and of I don't stop now then it could get worse and jeopardise the marriage. 

I have been going through a pretty traumatic time with my wife who has severe mental health issues so I think my anxiety had played a part in my destructive behaviour so  going to at least have a month off gambling until I'm in a better place.

I'm probably going against all of the rules here by not stopping completely but I can kind of identify with your dilemma, which is if I can control it then why not just stick to what I enjoy and what I'm good at but there's a voice in my head saying 'but can you...?'

ReplyQuote
Posted : 15th June 2021 11:07 am
Dre
 Dre
(@dre)

I’ve just read some of the advice on here, with a gambling addiction you can’t be half In half out! Cause that means your only a rush of blood to the head away from losing all your money and impacting your mental health ! Step 1 is admit you have a problem if you can’t do that then this horrible monster that we call gambling will eat you up! As it did me and many others on this site 

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Posted : 15th June 2021 10:21 pm
st3v3n
(@st3v3n)

I agree with the vast majority of what is being said - any problem with gambling in any form and you should abstain from gambling altogether in all forms for life. I meant that to extreme. You just simply have to change your ways including not going to bingo halls. I suspect you will continue, but does your other half agree or does he know the full story? And would you be brave enough to show him all these responses and discuss them like they could be wise words? Good luck, ps I'm 0% know it all and 100% being harsh as it's what I think you need to hear.

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Posted : 16th June 2021 11:17 pm
lastchance12072021
(@lastchance12072021)

I feel quite scared for you tbh with what saying. My relapse at start of last year and into this year started by whispering to me can control just a little will be fine. Thats after being gf for 4 years. Ultimately your choice but imo cant possibly be in recovery or facing up to being a cg by actively gambling in any form ( there are many as you well know). Really wish you all the best.

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Posted : 17th July 2021 3:02 pm
slowlearner
(@slowlearner)

Wow tizzy,

 Made a living from Bingo & Bandits ?,  well done you I'm impressed, you must have a brilliant mind to work out the percentages too. I ain't that clever. The only thing I know is that 99% of folk on here thought that they had the percentages worked out, some lost their homes, some lost their partners/spouses & some even lost the roof over their head. Personally I loved race horses but it wasn't when I started betting on dogs things all went wrong. I'd lost thousands, loved ones & my self respect long before I placed a bet on Trap2. You show all the symptoms of a CG desperate for help & most importantly a lack of reality.

 

Best Wishes

 

Al

This post was modified 3 months ago by slowlearner
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Posted : 17th July 2021 11:49 pm
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