Would love to know peoples opinions on this so here goes.
I racked up big debts throughout my addiction through loans. I'm sure many are in the same boat. I always found it very quick and easy to be given credit. An example is I took out a 12k loan with a well known bank. I already had loans. I filled out the on line application(took about 10 mins) exaggerated my earnings slightly and under exaggerated my outgoings. I was accepted instantly and the next day had 12k in my bank. If truth be told, I knew I couldn't afford the loan. It was to fund gambling and help pay other debts. If the bank had asked to see my statements I'm sure they wouldn't have touched me with a barge pole as I was clearly already in over my head but they did no checks other than a credit check.
This has been the same for all the loans I took out. Very easy for large amounts of money. When I admitted defeat to the addiction was pretty much the same time as the banks finally started saying no and I couldn't get anymore loans ( 34k in outstanding loans). If the banks said no earlier would I have faced my addiction sooner and not have ended up in as big a mess? Not sure really.
So my question is do you think the ease of the bank loan process helped fuel your gambling addiction?
I am not blaming banks and lenders for my problems btw but think it's been a contributing factor.
Thanks for reading and apologies for the length of the post!!
Hindsight is a wonderful thing. You have problems and therefore gamble to excess. You 'exaggerate ' to gain credit. You now have debt as well. If you were going to see sense you would have done when you ran out of your own money. I give my husband cash for fares, if he chooses to gamble with it, is it my fault for giving him cash? Many gamblers use loan sharks, payday loans, mum & dad's money. A gambler will do what he can to gamble. It's irrelevant where the money comes from. Unfortunately this is a world of credit and online banking. You chose to gamble, you chose to chase, you chose to borrow and exaggerate. Who is irresponsible? Is it irresponsible borrowing? In my humble opinion no, it wouldn't have changed where you are today and how much you gambled.
I used to blame lenders and gambling companies for my dire situation as I didn't want to take responsibility for my psychological defects that were the driving forces for my addiction. Looking back now after being in emotional sobriety for a while I see that no one else was to blame for my situation.
It's an interesting debate, Gareth. Banks are very similar to Gambling companies in the way they operate - speculating and hedging their bets, trying to get the house edge. The whole financial crash of 2008 was due to banks lending sub-prime and over-leveraging themselves by being greedy. In essence one could argue that banks are CGs. But where as you/me are the 'little man' who gets ruined for taking a greedy risk; the banks are 'too big to fail' and get bailed out by the tax-payer, who never had a choice in whether THEY wanted to gamble or not! Thus making every tax-payer by default a complicit CG at worst; or enabler at best, by bailing the CG out!
It sucks doesn't it! How can we have faith in a system of government that rewards failure, bails out reckless greed and lends money to people they knew full well couldn't pay it back. How can we hope to teach our children about responsibility when those at the top take none?
Money itself doesn't exist though. Even a bank note is only a promissary note, "I promise to pay the bearer on demand the sum of £10, etc".
When a bank lends you £300,000 for a mortgage, it's just numbers on a screen. Someone; somewhere presses a button on their computer and literally "creates" the £300,000 out of thin air and you spend the next 25+ years paying it back at massive interest! Nice!
If you really stop to think about it, the whole system is crazy!
However, we are where we are, and the world is the way it is. I don't agree with all this "Irresponsible Lending" schtick - it smacks to me of the last desperate move of a man-child who still refuses to take responsibility for their actions. If you knew you couldn't afford it, you only took it because you realistically believed you had a chance to gamble it and turn it into £££££££ more. And to be fair you DID have a chance. A CHANCE. But being a CG you inevitably lost. So it's no good b******g & whining to mummy that you now want it back 'coz it isn't fair! Wah, Wah!! 😉
Credit is too easily available, but only to over 18's. So unless we are prepared to admit we are just big damaged babies, then we knew what we were doing. Blaming it on an "illness" might work in the case of diminished responsibilty for manslaughter, but not a man-getting-slaughtered and then going onto a FOBTS.
And anyway, let's be honest, if we HAD won, would we have handed the winnings back to the casinos saying well fair's fair I shouldn't really have been leant the stake money in the first place, so it's only right I give my winnings back to you!
I think we all know the answer to that!
Thanks for the comments. Some really interesting points raised.
Yes I probably am looking to lay the blame elsewhere a bit when the reality is that it is all my doing. I got myself into it and I will get myself out of it.
The main point I was trying to get across was the ease to get loans for large amounts. I remember a friend about a year ago telling me he was amazed at how easy it was. He is a non gambler and had never had a loan. He needed one to buy a car. He had got pay slips and bank statements sorted and was amazed he didn't need to produce anything!!
If I was lending that sort of money out I would want to make d**n sure it could be re paid.
Maybe it's due to the highly competitive loan market? Lots of lenders wanting your business? IMO the same rules should be in place for applying for a mortgage
Hello Gareth. Yes interesting debate for sure. I think that most C.G's are looking for someone else to blame - bad influence, hard times, easy access to credit, unscrupulous bookmakers etc. And there will always be an element of truth in this. However, at some point we have to say to ourselves: "the buck stops with me".
Actually, nobody really forced us to do anything - it was our own choice.. Of course there's other stuff that can influence our decisions and in the cold light of day we might view the actions as stupid and nieve.
I took out many loans over the years but I think initially it was a case of - 'Wow, they'll let me have a car/holiday/clothing/gadgets now, without having to save up for them'. And this was probably before I got involved with gambling, and it always seemed like the loan option was available subconsciously, so I never really learned the value of money.
The thing is, addicts are misunderstood, from an outside perspective. And believe me there will never be any true sympathy from spouses, bank managers, gambling operators etc.
For example, an alcoholic may end up drinking themselves to death. The general response is: "Oh, it's so sad. They really should have talked to someone to get some help".
Or "Well it's their own fault really, there was plenty of warnings".
Or "They were just selfish, only thinking of themselves".
And all these comments would be dished out despite the fact that the person was suffering from depression/low self-esteem/heartache/despair.
That's why we need to take the opportunity to turn our lives around. Because nobody can live our lives for us and blaming others for our fate will never be accepted.
Hi mate. I'm really good thanks. You? Day 19 GF today . Some days better than others but in general I am feeling determined and positive for the future. The finances are already starting to look ever so slightly better even in these early days.
In regards to your earlier comment on the original topic. Very good points and I agree with everything you said. I have been looking to lay some of the blame for the mess I am in elsewhere. The reality is that I have got myself into this hole by myself so I need to get myself back out of it.
I'm self employed so have really thrown myself into work recently to keep my mind occupied and also to chip away at the debts and get to a better financial position but I CAN'T gamble again or it will all go back to square one or beyond.
Gareth1983 wrote: Hi mate. I'm really good thanks. You? Day 19 GF today . Some days better than others but in general I am feeling determined and positive for the future. The finances are already starting to look ever so slightly better even in these early days. In regards to your earlier comment on the original topic. Very good points and I agree with everything you said. I have been looking to lay some of the blame for the mess I am in elsewhere. The reality is that I have got myself into this hole by myself so I need to get myself back out of it. I'm self employed so have really thrown myself into work recently to keep my mind occupied and also to chip away at the debts and get to a better financial position but I CAN'T gamble again or it will all go back to square one or beyond. Cheers
Goes back to what me dad says, “ stop digging”
An interesting read.
The bottom line.
We know exactly what we are doing when we borrow the money.
Its 100% the responsibility of the gambler.
Of course the banks know what we are doing. They look at our spending patterns, they hedge there bets, they make it easy.
Sooner or later debt levels will become unsustainable on a world scale and we will have another "crash"... and so the cycle repeats. Its the financial system we live in.
It's actually sad to see people rack up so much debt. I mean I am not a stranger to loans myself (I do have a mortgage to pay, and the student loans I took out at the bank) but I never had problems like that and I feel like it's cuz you are not putting a limit on the amount of money you are loaning out