GamCare Logo
880 posts / 0 new
Last post
Posted on:
Thu, 10/03/2016 - 18:33

Boro

Joined:
2012-07-01

Life is pretty **** ex girlfriend causing me trouble plus got to deal with what I did last Wednesday. Things can only get better. But can never play roulette ever again!!!!!!!!

Posted on:
Fri, 11/03/2016 - 08:40

I wished

Joined:
2014-04-25

Things will surely get better as long as you don't play roulette:) and as your days build up, you will be able to deal with your ex's issues in a stronger and calmer way, you have got there before and I know you can do this my friend.

Suzanne xxx

Posted on:
Sat, 12/03/2016 - 20:16

Boro

Joined:
2012-07-01

Well another day goes by and yea I have gambled but not on roulette. Was winning £12.50 but went from that to losing £7.50. I can live with losing that but it still hurts because I have gone from winning to losing. I like having a bet on horses or dogs and I don't think I ever be able to give it up totally. 

Posted on:
Thu, 17/03/2016 - 20:54

Boro

Joined:
2012-07-01

Today I have lost about £50 on horse. I have come to the realisation I can not gamble on anything. Nothing at all because it just sets off the compulsive gambler in me. I have a lot to lose and I can't lose everything again.

Posted on:
Wed, 23/03/2016 - 19:41

Boro

Joined:
2012-07-01

Well life not to good but no more gambling but ex is not letting me see my daughter all because I didn't want to get back with her. Well will all this shiit ever end 

Posted on:
Sat, 30/04/2016 - 16:36

Boro

Joined:
2012-07-01

Can't seem to leave roulette alone not lost a lot this time but it has ruined the night I had planned. Don't know what comes over me but it has to stop because even if I won it would not be enough

Posted on:
Sat, 30/04/2016 - 17:23

I wished

Joined:
2014-04-25

 

Hi Graeme, 

Nothing changes if nothing changes, You can change and turn your life around, 

Good to see you back because it means you have not given up on giving up.

Sending you strong and positive thoughts as always.

Suzanne xxx

 

 

Posted on:
Sat, 30/04/2016 - 18:40

Boro

Joined:
2012-07-01

Never been away Suzanne just I don't comment on my diary. I read the forum most days and it surprises me how so few have succeeded in beating this addiction in the 5 and half years  

Posted on:
Sat, 30/04/2016 - 18:47

I wished

Joined:
2014-04-25

Meant writing on your diary:))

I don't think anyone will ever beat this addiction, but it can be contained, with changes and a different mindset my friend.

You will get there and you have progressed more than you realise at the moment.

Keep trying and trying,you will find your own way

Take care.

Suzanne xxx

Posted on:
Sat, 30/04/2016 - 19:52

Boro

Joined:
2012-07-01

I know what you ment Suzanne. People can go years but it's always they ready to strike 

Posted on:
Sat, 30/04/2016 - 20:17

I wished

Joined:
2014-04-25

It sure is Graeme, don't be too hard on yourself, it's a horrible addiction to have and it's such a secretive one, no knows unless we open up, and that is one of this addictions big card, it has so many hidden cards, we just have to work them out, by working ourselves out, one day at a time, if that makes sense.

Suzanne xxx

Posted on:
Sun, 01/05/2016 - 10:59

Boro

Joined:
2012-07-01

It is a horrible addiction Suzanne can't believe I'm still putting love ones through all this shiit. 

Posted on:
Sun, 07/08/2016 - 20:14

Boro

Joined:
2012-07-01

Still playing the roulette in betting shop. But they are a waste of time. Went in with a £5 today got up to £45 but instead of collecting it I carried on and lost the lot plus another £100 not a lot when you consider what I have lost in the past. Even when I win I give it back straight away. You just can't win on them must keep telling myself that 

Posted on:
Sat, 10/09/2016 - 19:08

Boro

Joined:
2012-07-01

Well gambling cost me another relationship. I have not lost a great amount of money just an odd £5 with a lad at work on football. But my girlfriend mam has taken great pleasure in telling her I'm a compulsive gambler and concerned about me gambling ,not good enough for her, I do nothing to help her. So it's all kicked off with her mam. I am a compulsive gambler but I have not lost a lot of money for a long time. Plus girlfriend 3 month pregnant

Posted on:
Sat, 10/09/2016 - 19:41

ALAN 135

Joined:
Before 2009

Hi boro , sorry to hear things are not good but without trying to sound harsh what do really expect , You are a compulsive gambler the amounts don't matter and your girlfriends mum is only doing what most mums would do and that's looking out for her daughter .

Looking back through your most recent posts and they all tell the same story , gambling and relationship problems because of it and the old saying of " nothing changes if nothing changes" comes to mind and if you keep doing the same thing how do you expect a different outcome ? .

Sorry mate I;m sounding as though I'm having a right go but you know what I'm saying , there's ever only one way to beat this and that's by stopping , it all boils down to how much you really want too .

Stay safe buddy and I hope things change for you .

Posted on:
Sat, 10/09/2016 - 20:43

Boro

Joined:
2012-07-01

I understand where you are coming from Alan. Her mam new about me gambling before we got together I have alway been open and honest but it doesn't excuse the fact I do have moment of madness been 1 bad moment of £1800 which her mother doesn't even know about 6 month ago. Her mother is a ***** but still no excuse for my gambling and I can't keep giving people excuses to say im acompulsive gambler get rid of him. Yes I am but I can't keep giving people excuses to use it against me.

Posted on:
Sat, 18/02/2017 - 22:17

Boro

Joined:
2012-07-01

Well got to say in the 5 months I have not posted I have gambled. But no where near to what I used to do. I don't have me cash card or any large amounts of money me mam keeps that because I would just go and lose it. If you don't want to lose large amounts of money you must give your cash card to somebody you trust. My debt now stands at £1000 which feels great considing it used to be nearly £15000

Posted on:
Tue, 01/08/2017 - 22:06

Boro

Joined:
2012-07-01

Well I have one payment on my debt left to go which comes out next Monday. Totally debt free considing the place I was in years ago it feels great. I still gamble can't stop don't want to stop. But it is very limited because I don't have me cash card otherwise I think I would go mad with it. But this is what I have to deal with I never beat it. I just have to manage it 

Posted on:
Tue, 15/08/2017 - 12:44

Boro

Joined:
2012-07-01

Well gone and lost £280 on roulette in the betting shop. Feel as sick as anything thoughtthem days of me chasing a loss we're pretty much over.i have lost pretty much everything because of these fobt and I'm still doing it. Even my family don't know what to do anymore because they are sick of it. Life's **** even though I don't have any debt anymore

Posted on:
Wed, 16/08/2017 - 17:53

Boro

Joined:
2012-07-01

Well today I have made another mistake. I opened a account up with 21 casino was losing 50 but managed to get 46 back but I was honest with me mam now she going mad. Sick to death is an understatement I can't take much more of this shiit like

Posted on:
Thu, 17/08/2017 - 23:13

Boro

Joined:
2012-07-01

Must get it in my head I can't play fobt or roulette of any kind again. It's slowly killing me mam off and I love her to bits.Been off work for a week I bet I have lost at least £400 some of it was winning but that's not the point. I have been on here a long time now and yeah I'm not as bad as I was but it's still not good enough. I have lived this nightmare for the last 10 years or so I have had two relationships in that time and both were pretty much destroyed by gambling. I have a child with both. The 4 month old I don't see. Life just **** at the moment not in debt but I'm only 1 step away from disaster if this gambling continues. I have to sort myself out only I can stop the slide

Posted on:
Sat, 06/01/2018 - 14:32

Boro

Joined:
2012-07-01

Well I have done the same thing gone and lost £600 on the fobt in a matter of half an hour. Sick is not the word when will I ever learn.  The money I can cope with it just me doing the same things over and over I know I can’t play them because it turns me into a different person

Posted on:
Sat, 20/01/2018 - 12:00

Boro

Joined:
2012-07-01

Can’t believe I have just gone and lost another £300 for **** sake when this going to end with the fobt.

Posted on:
Sat, 20/01/2018 - 12:08

volcano

Joined:
2010-07-05

Hello Boro, another fellow who’s still seeking for this penny to drop. I get the devastation your feeling right now, but hai you’ve tapped back into some kinda force or realisation by just coming back here. Things have worked for you in the past and as hard as it may seem right now but you’ve come along way albeit stumbling over a familiar hurdle. Go back to what has worked on the past and build up the ammo to get over that hurdle. 

I wish you well

Posted on:
Sat, 20/01/2018 - 12:33

Boro

Joined:
2012-07-01

It’s not the money volcano it’s just the thought of doing the same thing over and over again. I have lost my family through it but I still do it. It’s just stupid gambling you can’t beat a machine but I still do it.

Posted on:
Sat, 20/01/2018 - 18:54

volcano

Joined:
2010-07-05

Just by saying ‘ it’s not the money ‘ shows a lot in my book in how far you’ve came. Money is probably at the bottom of what gambling addiction has taken from us. 

You said about doing the same thing over and over again ! I get that, so what will you try differently this time ? 

Posted on:
Sat, 20/01/2018 - 19:45

Boro

Joined:
2012-07-01

All I can say is I can’t take anymore of it. My mam controls my money anyway so I have told her too be me more stricter. The new maximum stake is decided on Tuesday so hopefully it’s no more than £20 and that will stop me to a point 

Posted on:
Sun, 21/01/2018 - 12:01

Boro

Joined:
2012-07-01

Today first day of no gambling. The target is to get to Cheltenham week without a bet then I take it from they. Still got money saved up but losing £900 in the first month of the year really ****** me off when I think about it. The only good point is I’m in no debt and got a little bit of savings. I really hope they is a dramatic reduction in the maximum spin on the fobt 

Posted on:
Sun, 21/01/2018 - 13:34

Bryan

Joined:
2017-12-24

Hi . I wouldn’t be relying on reducing maximum stakes to get myself out of the situation . I would be doing everything I can to stop myself being able to gamble . You obviously want to stop . If you read any new members first few posts the advice is the same . I know you have been on this site before but I would suggest treating yourself as a new member right now . Blocks . You don’t seem to have any in place apart from your mum with the money . If you really want to succeed as a non gambler you must self exclude yourself from the places where you gamble . Only then can you make a mental switch that even if you wanted to gamble you couldn’t . After a while your brain will switch and realise that it’s pointless thinking about it . Try not to be too hard on yourself . It’s better to come back now and give it a good go before you lose more than just the money in your account 

Posted on:
Mon, 22/01/2018 - 10:32

Boro

Joined:
2012-07-01

I know what I have to do vulture. Cheers for the advice.                       I’m going to take each day as it comes because if I plan ahead I always mess things up. Still feeling a bit low but if 900 is the most I lose in a year I can easy get that back by saving. Got to look on the positive 

Posted on:
Mon, 22/01/2018 - 13:18

Took a wrong turn

Joined:
2012-02-22

Well done Boro on looking at the positives, keep making the right choices

Wilsy

Posted on:
Mon, 22/01/2018 - 22:37

Bryan

Joined:
2017-12-24

Keep going I believe in you 

Posted on:
Wed, 24/01/2018 - 13:45

Boro

Joined:
2012-07-01

Cheers wilsey and vulture                 Got my head around my loss. No thoughts of gambling just taken each day as it comes. Get my bonus from work next month that will be £300 which covers my last loss. This year can be my year if I stopgambling on the fobt. The feeling of going till the end of year without playing on them will be great and it will happen

Posted on:
Thu, 25/01/2018 - 22:44

Bryan

Joined:
2017-12-24

How’s the last day been for you ?

Posted on:
Fri, 26/01/2018 - 10:32

Boro

Joined:
2012-07-01

Yeah things been fine vulture. Not thought about gambling at all. But I ain’t a gambler who gambles everyday. I’m enjoying the calm at not gambling to be honest 

Posted on:
Sat, 27/01/2018 - 00:10

Bryan

Joined:
2017-12-24

Glad to hear it , hope you have a fantastic weekend 

Posted on:
Sat, 27/01/2018 - 17:06

Boro

Joined:
2012-07-01

No gambling a week ago today was my last bet on the fobt. When I think about it now. How crazy are we feeding a machine where even if we win we just go back the next day and lose what we have won and even more. Playing on them things are pointless. But I just take one day at a time and not plan ahead of myself 

Posted on:
Mon, 29/01/2018 - 12:08

Boro

Joined:
2012-07-01

Well a bad weekend not with gambling my uncle died of Parkinson’s. He has suffered for 2 years only 62. Just shows you have to enjoy life while you can 

Posted on:
Sat, 10/02/2018 - 16:16

Boro

Joined:
2012-07-01

Well gone and lost another £300 in about 20 mins. Sick as a chip but this time I came home lend a tenner off my mam and went and got a photo taken and went straight too beetfreed and self excluded the only company I’m not band from. Sick of doing the same thing life bad enough without me going and losing money like it’s Monopoly money. Learn learn learn from my mistakes that’s what your supposed to do. Them machines turn me into somebody I don’t like and I keep putting my love ones through the same ****. Lost the last 2 relationships through gambling but I still do it. Been on this website for about 6 years the only thing that’s changed is I’m not in debt anymore but still doing stupid things. 

Posted on:
Sat, 10/02/2018 - 18:53

geordie

Joined:
2009-08-17

Hello Boro.

I was wondering how you managed to gamble the £300 if your Mam's looking after your money? 

Mate one day hopefully enough will definatley be enough for you. That day obviousley isn't today if you're cicumnavigating the blocks you have in place to prevent you gambling.

Self exclusion is a great block to have in place why dont you join the MOSES thing? It will get you excluded from all bookies in a particular area. self-exclusion.co.uk.

I'd gambled all my life, I've commited serious crimes to fund my gambling exploits, how bloody pathetic is that? I went to prison 4 times before I was 30 because of this. I still gambled a lot even after this, I went back to prison after 17 years because I got hooked backed in on the FOBT's. I know how hard it is to break away from them.

At the end of the day mate they are computers, they were not designed to make any of us rich, they are not programmed to make us rich. Personally I do not think they are fixed, but they dont need to be do they. The odds are always, always in the bookies favour.

So where do you go from here man? Caryy on trying the same things but try harder? It's no life fighting urges everytime you have a few quid. Is there something you can do differently this time around?

I cant put my finger on what it was for me, but I've had one real urge to gamble in the the last year it was hard, very bloody hard not to cave in to it. For the most part I dont get any urges, and I know how very fortunate I am to be in this new "headspace". 

I honestly believe anybody has the ability to stop gambling. I think half the trouble for me was accepting that I could change, I dont know what you think but when I was in similar situations to the one you're in today I would be thinking I was doomed to it for the rest of my life. It's not so man.

I was homeless in London sleeping in phone boxes and doorways eating chips that people had thrown away, and I've been in worse scenarios than that, all because I fed them machines. I'm not saying you're heading that way Boro but just like I know people can change and put an end to this madness, I know people can keep sliding backwards and backwards.

We are compulsive gamblers' mate, because of that we know we shouldn't gamble. I know it's easier said than done but the bottom line is chosing not do it. 

I went into rehab in 2009 and it was in there I found the belief I could change. The rehab didnt fix me, neither has counselling, GA, Gamcare or counselling. But all these things have helped me realise that I could change. 

If your Mam is still handling your money, why not ask her to share the responsibility with someone else, it might be too easy to kid her but if she has another person helping it may give her the courage to challange you.

Do you use any other form of support mate? Your doctor should be able to put you in touch with a local addictions counsellor, failing that the National Gambling Clinic, and Gamcare both offer counselling services.

Have you considered the GMA residential centres, you would be amazed at what you can learn about yourself in there. I think that maybe that was the catalyst to my recovery, although I left there in 2010 and within 6 months I was back into gambling, and nearly went to jail again. What I learn't in there hasn't left me and I'm pretty certain that it never will. I'm over a year into my new life without gambling, it was Dec 2016 I last put any money in a FOBT, about two months wages in about an hour and a half I think.

I dont judge you for gambling today Boro, I am pleased that it wasn't me though. I don't think I'm cured by any stretch of the imagination but I know that just for today I won't be gambling. I dont see why things should be any different tomorrow.

It is always just one day at a time, but that one day at a time does not need to be full of urges and desires to gamble.

I wish you all the best with it mate.

Geordie.

Posted on:
Sat, 10/02/2018 - 19:25

Boro

Joined:
2012-07-01

I said to her I just have a few bets on the horses so I went and drew £100 out. She came with me to get money. I was going to put £60 of bets on but once I got in betting shop the fobt addiction took over. I lost the £100 very quickly but me mam was still sitting in the car and I begged her to give me another £200 and went on and on till she give up. Went back in and lost last pretty quickly as well. I was never up. 

Posted on:
Sat, 10/02/2018 - 19:32

Boro

Joined:
2012-07-01

I have had counselling  before mate and I have been to the doctors they are useless and have no idea about gambling addiction. But what I have done today blocking my favourite beetfred and a couple of others. I think that should help already blocked at all the others in the local area 

Posted on:
Sat, 10/02/2018 - 20:24

geordie

Joined:
2009-08-17

Fair do's mate.

Counselling I think will only ever work for any of us if we go into it with a clear mind, I was six months clear of gambling when I first went.

I've been skimming through your whole thread for the last couple of hours, one thing above all else stood out for me. It was when you said telling people you're a compulsive gambler is something they will hold against you. People like your ex-partnesrs mam. Some people will use this against you, some people will judge you as a piece of shite for being so. The same way people are quick to judge alcoholics or junkies.

However once people start to see you actually take action against your addiction and standing tall against it a lot will see you in a different light. With fighting addiction mate, I think actions most definatley do speak louder than words.

How does your mam feel about all of this mate. I havnt read every single entry on your thread so maybe I've missed something, you dont need me to point out to you that you're being really unfair to her.

Really Boro, as long as you're gambling whether it is footy, horses or roulette, even the lottery you are not giving yourself the chance.

Would you not agree that you are powerless over gambling? It has this hold over you,just like it did with me for 35 years. When I stopped going on bandits, it was the bookies, then the casino's, then the card schools. It was all gambling and it always ended up the same way. It always does and it always will for a CG. This has proven to be the case with every single compulsive gambler I've evr met, and I've met a fair few.

Even if youd just managed to get away with your horses bets today and lost £60 its still gambling man, you know yourself even if you won chances are they'd get it back. 

To me it most definitly sounds as if you are powerless over gambling, and that your life has become unmanagable because of it. Until you take a stand against the whole kit and caboodle, I think you're going to keep falling into the same trap.

I wonder though if today you really only wanted to put your bets on, or if you really wanted to go on the FOBT's. Because if your Mam was willing to give you the £100 and wait outside the bookies for you, she probably would have went in and put your bets on to save you the temptation of the FOBT's. I dont think that would have been a good plan, I'm just saying you could have managed to stay out of the bookies. When we gamble so much our thoughts and thinking are distorted, no two ways about it.

It's hard to be honest when you've gambled for years, especially with yourself. It's also easy for me to sit here preaching to you with my gamble free time behind me. I have 1 year gamble free mate and 35 f**d up years because of gambling. I know how hard it was for me to be honest with myself.

Ask yourself why you wanted to gamble today, what could it possibly give you?  All it can give you man is more of the same because like me, you are powerless against it.

I dont write anybody off Boro, and I believe in you mate, but I think you have a lot of hard work and soul searching ahead of you, There is absoloutly no reason whatsoever that you should gamble ever again. You gambled today let that be the last time man.

You can do this, but it has to be the whole hog. An alcoholic couldn't give up whiskey and just drink gin, its all alcohol. A CG cant give up roulette and just do the footy, its all gambling.

Dont look at it as a life long comittment to stopping gambling, just commit each day as it comes.

Take care. 

Posted on:
Sat, 10/02/2018 - 20:45

geordie

Joined:
2009-08-17

Boro, thanks for popping over and posting on my thrread.

I hope you dont think I was preaching to you mate, I can only share my own thoughts and opinions. its a tough cookie to crack as you know..

I know what's working for me that's all, I just wanted to share.I know everybody is not like I was but I'm always fearful people will end up there.

Posted on:
Sun, 11/02/2018 - 08:58

Boro

Joined:
2012-07-01

I really appreciate your comments geordie everything you say is true.i can’t gamble again on anything 

Posted on:
Sun, 18/02/2018 - 15:12

Boro

Joined:
2012-07-01

No gambling on the fobt. Not even thought about going in because me baring myself from beetfred means I can’t go in which is such a relief. Yes I could go in but it would be embarrassing being told to leave. 

Posted on:
Wed, 20/06/2018 - 19:52

Boro

Joined:
2012-07-01

Well I want in the betting shop today it had been coming and lost £320 on the fobt. I lost this amount by using Apple Pay on my phone could only get £30 a time so I went backwards and forth 10 times and had £20 in me pocket what an idiot. My mam is disgusted in me and I have not told her the exact amount if she new there would be hell on. It’s not the money lost it’s the sickening feeling losing on them. One day I learn but this reduction in stake can’t come quick enough

Posted on:
Wed, 20/06/2018 - 20:01

Change

Joined:
2015-01-30

Bloody hell Boro lad! You’ve been sucked right back in. You’ve not got enough protection... you need better barriers to prevent it as that sounded way too easy.

That photo gets me everytime pal. Puts it into my mind that every time we gamble we edge that bit further away from our kids. It’s gotta stop.

Stay safe and chin up. Well done for being honest at least.

Posted on:
Wed, 20/06/2018 - 20:52

Boro

Joined:
2012-07-01

Far to easy mate. Lost my daughters mam because of my addiction to fobt but I still do it. That’s how stupid it is mate 

Posted on:
Sat, 01/09/2018 - 15:59

Boro

Joined:
2012-07-01

Well, well I have gone and done it again. Lost £2750 on the fobt this morning. £700 or £800 was money I had won. But about £2000 of my money which I work for gone in an hour. How stupid is that? Feeling low as you always do after a blowout like that. I just never learn. The only positives is I’m not in debt because I’d done so well saving up. What a fuucking idiot I am the woman behind counter must ha e sought I was round the bend keep going back to the counter putting £500 on a time. Ahhhhhhhhhhh!!!!!!!

Pages

Pages