What is success?

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Compulsive Gambler
(@compulsive-gambler)
Posts: 672
 

fair play to you for doing so, cant of been easy. sorry to hear of the job challenges though, albeit hopefully you do find something on PAYE and the deductions are manageable though

 
Posted : 20th June 2018 8:39 pm
geordie
(@geordie)
Posts: 72
Topic starter
 

Cheers, fingers crossed 🙂

 
Posted : 21st June 2018 11:20 am
gadaveuk
(@gadaveuk)
Posts: 1718
 

Hi

What is success?

It is by our own achievements by being healthy and productive in every avenue of our life.

It is also being self sufficient fulfilling our healthy needs, fulfilling our healthy wants , fulfilling our healthy goals and productive with healthy interactions with all people.

My day is broken in to thirds, need time, want and goal time, and rest time.

During my obsessive addictive times I was not very productive, I lacked clarity in my thinking, I lacked focus on one thing at a time.

Because of the high levels of fear in me I use to go in to panic mode very quickly.

As I face my fears head on my levels of fear in me reduce to very low levels and rarely do I panic these days.

Due to my fears it was very hard to in the moment.

Living in the past is not healthy, guilt, shame, remorse, regret, envy, blame, etc.

Living in fear of the future is also not healthy, so by staying in the moment I have so many skills and abilities that were untapped when I was being unhealthy.

Being healthy I do daily lists of my healthy needs of my healthy wants and of my healthy goals.

Before my recovery I wished my life away till next pay day, I did most things reluctantly and resentfully, conditionally, in time I would give of myself unconditionally expecting nothing in return, that is what love is.

When I use to say I love you it was conditional, I was expecting some thing in return, today when say that I love you it was unconditional.

Becoming more and more accountable to myself I am in effect maturing and growing up.

This was and is today part of the healing of my inner child.

By working the recovery program I am able to reach my full potential in every avenue of my life.

The reward for being successful in the recovery program is pride in our healthy actions pride in our healthy words towards other people.

The recovery program helped me help myself, the recovery program helped me understand how unhealthy I was.

The recovery program is a manual to helping a person help them self heal and become healthy and whole once more.

Understanding the serenity was important, that the only person I can change is myself.

Understanding the serenity that my unhealthy reactions towards people life and situations was both  unhealthy and my responsibility.

How much more can I achieve in my life today, who sets that limit, what excuse do I use today to not get my a*s in to gear, and more so become more healthy and more successful than I was yesterday.

The recovery program is all about progress not perfection.

Is it important to understand why I GAMBLED of course it is.

Is pride a healthy feeling today, of course it is.

Love and peace to every one

Dave L

AKA Dave of Beckenham

 
Posted : 8th May 2019 6:46 pm
gadaveuk
(@gadaveuk)
Posts: 1718
 

Hi

My addictions and obsessions were a form of escape from people life and situations I felt emotionally vulnerable about. 

My success today is based up on my healthy actions and my healthy words I use today.

Are my healthy actions and my healthy words nurturing towards myself and other people today.

Do I have written down my needs today. 

Do I have written down my wants today. 

Do I have written down my goals today. 

When I get things done do I cross them off the lists.

Why be reluctant and have unhealthy motives today.

Just for today I will not give in to unhealthy habits.

Once I took recovery seriously I would understand that success in the reward to our self for being healthy and productive.

During my addictions and obsessions times I never felt that I was healthy and productive.

During my addictions and obsessions times I felt that I was in decline in so many ways.

Love and peace to every one

Dave L

AKA Dave of Beckenham

 
Posted : 11th May 2019 1:41 pm
gadaveuk
(@gadaveuk)
Posts: 1718
 

Hi

Today success is about being healthy in so many ways.

Every action has consequences, every healthy action has healthy consequences, every unhealthy action has unhealthy consequences.

Today success is about not reacting in unhealthy ways to the pans of my past.

Today success is about not living in fear of emotional intimacy.

Today success is about not having to lie.

Today success is about not having to live in fear of being honest and being myself.

Today success is about not having to procrastinate any more.

Today success is about celebrating every day, not living in fear of each day.

Today success is not going against my own conscience and going against spiritual values, non religious.

Today success is about interacting in healthy ways to all people, to no longer react in unhealthy ways to all people.

Today success is about expressing my gratitude and appreciation towards all people.

Today success is about not living in fear, and people not not living in fear of me.

Love and peace to every one

Dave L

AKA Dave of Beckenham

 
Posted : 16th May 2019 7:50 am
gadaveuk
(@gadaveuk)
Posts: 1718
 

Hi

What is success, for me it is no longer being unhealthy.

My success is based up on working hard on my recovery and healing my pains.

To live my life today with out my fears holding me back.

To not live in the past.

Who I was on day one entering the recovery program is not who I am today.

I have more gratitude and appreciation today.

I do have to lie today.

I have exchanged unhealthy habits in to healthy habits.

I daily write down my needs my wants and my goals.

It all started with just for today I will not gamble.

In being more caring towards myself I am able to be more caring towards other people.

My conscience is spiritual based, and I am able to interact with people today in healthy ways rather than react in unhealthy ways today.

My unhealthy reactions in anger indicated to me that my hurt inner child was not healed.

The recovery program helped me heal in so many ways I did not think was possible.

Please keep going to meetings, you will benefit from it in so many ways.

My success is about me working with like minded people towards healthier living and being more productive today

Love and peace to every one

Dave L

AKA

Dave of Beckenham

 
Posted : 22nd May 2019 2:06 pm
gadaveuk
(@gadaveuk)
Posts: 1718
 

Hi

What is success being healthy and productive.

What is success being accountable to myself and other people.

What is success no longer wasting my time or my money.

What is success no longer living in any kind of fears or self doubt.

What is success no longer living in fear of change or growth.

What is success being healed from the pains of my past.

What is success being able to no longer react in unhealthy ways.

What is success my family no longer live in fear of me.

What is success my family no longer doubt me or mistrust me today.

What is success I am no longer afraid of the postman.

What is success I am no longer afraid of the telephone.

What is success I am able to be myself and no longer fear emotional intimacy with other people.

Please keep going to meetings, you will benefit from it in so many ways.

Love and peace to every one.

Dave L

AKA

Dave of Beckenham

 
Posted : 27th May 2019 3:05 am
gadaveuk
(@gadaveuk)
Posts: 1718
 

Hi Geordie

At one time I use to think that people who had lots of money were successful.

I use to meet some very wealthy people, then one day I asked one of them are you happy having so much money today.

The man asked me do you think that my goal in life was money.

I said yes, he replied my my goal in life was to be successful, it was never money orientated.

The consequences of being successful is money.

Money was never my goal.

So what is success to me today.

I turned to my addictions and obsessions to escape people life and situations when I was feeling emotionally vulnerable.

The recovery program was only a manual for me to learn from.

The recovery program helped me become more accountable to myself.

I walked in to the recovery program thinking that gambling controlled my life, that was not true.

I use to feel so helpless and that I did not control my life and how I felt.

In the recovery program I learned that recovery is about healing from the pains of my past.

The recovery program helped me become healthy productive and more accountable to myself.

The recovery program helped me to write down my needs my wants and my  goals.

The recovery program helped me understand the only person that limited me was myself.

The recovery program helped me take unhealthy habits and change them in to healthy habits.

The consequences of being successful is I no longer live in fear.

The consequences of being successful is I no longer procrastinate getting things done.

The consequences of being successful is I no longer hurt myself or other people.

The consequences of being successful is I am more nurturing and encouraging towards other people.

The consequences of being successful is I no longer am angry resentful impatient intolerant resentful jealous or have hatred in my heart today.

The consequences of being successful is I no longer have emotional ties to gambling today.

Love and peace to everyone.

Dave L

AKA Dave of Beckenham

 
Posted : 25th June 2019 3:51 pm
gadaveuk
(@gadaveuk)
Posts: 1718
 

Hi

Success is being able to put the best effort I can in to every thing I do or say which is healthy and has healthy consequences.

Success is progress in every avenue of my life.

Success is being motivated in healthy ways.

Success is being proud of our healthy words and actions.

Success is being able to embrace spiritual values in every interaction with other people.

Success is being able to be nurturing and encouraging to a vulnerable person who is struggling.

Success is being the best person I can be today.

Please keep going to meetings, you will benefit from it in so many ways.

Love and peace to every one.

Dave L

AKA Dave of Beckenham

 
Posted : 4th July 2019 6:53 am
gadaveuk
(@gadaveuk)
Posts: 1718
 

Hi

For me giving up my addictions and obsessions was only the start of my recovery and my healing.

I gave up talking about being in actions and money lost, I started to talk about my feelings and my emotions.

As I gave therapies I opened myself up to the possibility that I was emotionally vulnerable.

When I walked in to the meetings was a sign of strength, when I told meetings I had gone back to gambling again was a sign of strength, when I told people and meetings I was emotionally vulnerable.was a sign of strength.

My success today is I do not live in fear.

My success today is my interactions with all people healthy or not.

My success today is I do not have to lie.

My success today is I do not have to live a facade or pretend to be some one I am not.

My success today is I do not waste time or relationships.

My success today is I do not smoke.

My success today is I do not get drunk.

My success today is I do not drink tea or coffee.

My success today is that in the morning I wake up stimulated in to facing my needs, facing my wants, facing my  goals.

My success today is that I apologize and make good damaged relationships.

My success today is that I live for today only.

My success today is that I do not live in the past, I learn from it.

My success today is that I am no longer a threat to other people.

My success today is that I am no longer feel emotionally connected towards gambling or any other addictions or obsessions.

My success today is that I am no longer go back to addictions or obsessions no mater happens in my life today.

My success today is that I am more productive than any other time in my life.

My success today is that I show appreciation and gratitude towards all people I have contact with today.

Please keep going to meetings, you will benefit from it in so many ways.

Love and peace to every one.

Dave L

AKA Dave of Beckenham

 
Posted : 12th July 2019 1:10 pm
gadaveuk
(@gadaveuk)
Posts: 1718
 

Hi

Success is over coming procrastination and getting my needs done, getting my wants done, getting honest with Success is being the healthiest person I can be today.

Success is honest and accountable to myself.

Success is understanding my emotional triggers, my pains not healed.

Success is understanding my my fears not faced.

Success is understanding my frustrations due to my unreasonable expectations of people life and situations. By me having unreasonable expectations of people life and situations I was effect causing myself pains time and time again.

Success is understanding my emotional triggers of my feelings of loneliness due to my fears of emotional intimacy.

Success is understanding my emotional triggers were my feelings of being bored. I can be honest today with out being cruel or adversely affecting other people.

Success is understanding I can embrace change towards healthy habits today.

Success is understanding I can reduce my unhealthy reactions to people life and situations.

Success is acknowledging my hurt inner child was not healed.

Success is acknowledging my unhealthy reactions in anger, resentments, impatience intolerance, jealous, envy, rage, lack of trust, guilt shame regret remorse penance person pleasing vengeance mistrust self worth low self esteem indicate that I am not fully healthy and not at serenity with myself today.

Success is not taking on unhealthy peoples emotional baggage on board today.

Success is being content sincere mature healed and whole with in myself today.

Success is understanding that by being alone and isolated on my own is not a healthy way to live my life today.

Success is understanding that I work better in a tam of like minded people.

Success is understanding that I can live today with out my addiction obsessions or adversely affecting

Success is understanding that honesty is the best policy today.

Please keep going to meetings, you will benefit from it in so many ways.

Love and peace to every one.

Dave L

AKA Dave of Beckenham

 
Posted : 13th July 2019 7:55 am
gadaveuk
(@gadaveuk)
Posts: 1718
 

Hi

Being successful is being self sufficient and productive in every avenue of my life and with my relationships with other people.

Not being angry is a good day.

Not having to escape people life and situations is good day.

Not living in fear is good day.

Writing down my needs wants and my goals is good day.

Being able to interact with all people is good day.

Not doubting myself any more is good day.

Being patient and tolerant with myself is good day.

Once I was well in to my recovery my steel was going to be tested more and more, in time my fears and self doubts reduced.

Love and peace to every one.

Dave L

AKA Dave of Beckenham

 
Posted : 25th August 2019 3:25 pm
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