DMP is the best thing I’ve done to stop gambling.

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gettingbackontrack
(@gettingbackontrack)
Posts: 9
Topic starter
 

I racked up £40k of debt from gambling. I tried counselling, Self exclusions everything. If you’re a problem gambler you know that you’ll always find a way.  

but December I finally hit rock bottom and called PayPlan to start a DMP. 

it was the best thing I’ve done. It was awful to confront initially. But then it was sorted. I agreed what I could pay. And just made one payment a month to my creditors.

 

then through lockdown, I’ve saved more money. I’ve been able to pay more off and got a promotion. 

I’ve worked out today I paid off £12,000 this year!

A DMP might not be for everyone. But holy hell it is for me. My life is so much better for it. I know I’ve got a long way to go. 

but! It’s been the biggest thing to help me not gamble. Because I’m not as stressed and focused on all the horrible stuff. I don’t need to escape reality. I’m not trying to chase back my losses. I’ve actually got a way out. 

I wish I’d done it sooner. 

Hopefully, if anyone is reading this and has debts they can’t face- Please just try calling them. I’ve been in this position. 

I really believe thats saved my life. 

It gets better

 
Posted : 8th December 2020 11:27 am
Joydivider
(@joydivider)
Posts: 2156
 

Im just a little worried here that it reads like a placed promotion for a commercial company. 

Its made me uneasy as it doesnt discuss the core root of the problem and how you face recovery. 

It basically says hit rock bottom.... called named debt management company... all sorted...... tried exclusions etc but it was the dmp that sorted it....come on now!

A debt mangement programme doesnt block a person from gambling nor deal with the emotions on a recovery journey. 

I would suggest getting advice from the CAB and even speaking to your creditors first. Fees are involved with a commercial company and you have to decide if thats worth it. They dont have the automatic power to stop every claim or freeze interest if the creditor company wont accept the payment.  

Im going to stick my neck out here as it reads like a pure advertisement. I cant win but I will let the moderators decide. I dont mean to cause any offence but I will speak my mind when I read the way this is worded

 
Posted : 8th December 2020 12:21 pm
(@chezzy)
Posts: 72
 

If possible could you explain a little more.eg how long have you had a problem?  What other things did you try before you found this particular answer?  It sounds a bit cut and dried..so as I said could you explain a bit more of your story. 

Regards Chezzy 

 
Posted : 8th December 2020 1:34 pm
Joydivider
(@joydivider)
Posts: 2156
 

I would also just like to say to everyone on the forum to read the reviews about dmp companies and make up your own mind.

I have good knowledge about this subject. Yes a company could help in certain circumstances but you have to be fully aware that they are not doing it for nothing and you could be fearful customer thinking they are totally on your side. Some are useless and some abuse their power to get more money out of you which doesnt end up where you think its going...fact!

I care about people on this forum and enough reviews are very bad. scarily so. Be aware and get lots of advice from the CAB and even the creditors have an interest in working with you to sort it out as smoothly as possible

I understand that debts can be overwhelming especially with a lot of creditors. However it is something you can do yourself and save a lot of money in fees. You can also keep some control that you wouldnt have with a third party "plan"

The CAB are a great help in getting initial advice and they will help you through it.

We will open a proper topic on dmp companies....notice Im mentioning no names.

So if GBOT gets back to me we can discuss a gambling problem like adults. If you are there its the way you have worded that which reads like an advertisement

Best wishes to everyone on the forum

This post was modified 3 years ago by Joydivider
 
Posted : 8th December 2020 2:23 pm
c43h
 c43h
(@c43h)
Posts: 607
 

I can't help but listen to my other friends here.  When do you call out a post (pitch)?  I will have the b.ls and say this. Your post sounds like advertising. No offence but I challenge you to come back and share more of your story, not the company you turned to for financial guidance.

 

 
Posted : 8th December 2020 2:38 pm
gettingbackontrack
(@gettingbackontrack)
Posts: 9
Topic starter
 

Hi thanks for the response - I appreciate the challenges. Things have not be straight forward on my recovery and sorry if it comes across like that. I wanted to share this because I’m relieved that ive finally made headway and taking control of paying things back through a DMP has been integral to that. 

More details: 

2017- started problem gambling, quickly got through £15k of savings 

2018- wasn’t working and burnt through even more. Kept trying to stop. Even had Counscelling and confessed to my family.  But then as soon as I had access to money I spent it all. My debts were pilling up and I took at a £10k loan that I thought would consolidate everything and I could finally stop.

 

nope! I spent even more, I got up to £17k and was betting thousands. If I just won a bit more then I could pay everything back. 

2019- I was in a better paying job, new girlfriend, was doing better. But kept on gambling. I owed money all over and the interest and charges were hundreds a month. I was using credit to pay off other bills and just making my minimum payments. There was so many accounts. 

it was so stressful but I kept my head in the sand. 

this was a key reason why I kept gambling. I didn’t want to face up to things. When I was gambling I didn’t have to think about the debt and - I could convince myself that if I got a big win I could pay some of it off or all of it off and then I wouldn’t have to worry anymore. 

Obviously this never happened. I would just spend more. And hate myself.

It eventually came to a head at the end of 2019, id missed some payments and couldn’t keep this cycle of moving money from everywhere. I was so scared. I was getting letters and phone calls from everywhere. I hadn’t told my family. I hadn’t told anyone. 

eventually I cracked and called a Debt management charity Payplan. 

Payplan are free!! Step change are free as well. There are other companies that charge. I definitely don’t advise going with anyone that charges to do the same job.

anyway, I spoke to Payplan and it was such a relief. I could finally admit to someone how much I owed. It was a bit of a hassle setting it up- providing income expenditure/ sending documents. And it was horrible to realise I owed £40k But! All my creditors accepted and agreed to FREEZE INTEREST AND CHARGES. If it wasn’t for that I wouldn’t be able to make any progress. 

So I was finally paying them off. I’d already self excluded from so many gambling sites. I’d been to three different councillors. And they all helped for a bit. But in the end, I needed to just start facing up to things and paying off my debt. 

Once I could see I was making progress that calmed me down so much. Because I wasn’t in this constant stressful situation anymore I didn’t feel the need to gamble. Plus- I didn’t have access to any money because all my credit was in the DMP.

so, for me. I needed this. Calling Payplan to confess my debts and then arranging to pay was the best thing I’d done. 

I get that reads like an advert. But I just wish I’d done it a year earlier because then I wouldn’t have had an extra year of charges. And I’d have probably stopped gambling sooner. Once I had something in place I could focus my attention elsewhere. On doing the things I enjoy. I realised I wasn’t gambling because I enjoy it. I was gambling because my life was so stressful and I needed to fix that. A big reason it was so stressful was because I was in so much debt. Ironic.

I’m writing all this because I think i need to for myself. But also to tell others if they’re in the same situation as I was- things get better. I now owe £28k that’s still loads but, it’s going down and I don’t really have any urges to gamble because my life is better. 

you have to do what’s right for you. But if you’re in the rock bottom place and it feels like there’s no way out. There is. There can be. Speak to someone. And if you make progress you can look back in a years time with relief. You can actually be happy again. 

 

 
Posted : 8th December 2020 2:53 pm
(@chezzy)
Posts: 72
 

I'm sorry I'm not convinced. Your post sounds like a mantra. .not a story. Of course this is only my opinion. 

 
Posted : 8th December 2020 3:05 pm
gettingbackontrack
(@gettingbackontrack)
Posts: 9
Topic starter
 

To add, other things I’d done along the way to help and how they helped (or not)

 

1) Self-excluded from sites after a big loss.

- This was good. But the problem is there are so many sites. It’s so easy to set up another account. I think that Gamstop is better but I’ve never gotten round to sending my documents to complete registration. I’m sure if you can do that it will help.

 

2) confessing to family/friends

- this was massive and felt like a big weight had been lifted. The trouble was it didn’t make the problem go away. I relapsed later and felt like I couldn’t face up to them to tell the how bad it had got. 

3) Counscelling

- I originally got spoke to a gambling specialist councillor. It helped a bit to keep me accountable. I spoke to some others as well. They helped for a bit but I never really felt like they got me. And I couldn’t be totally honest with them. This kind of forum is much better for me. Because I know people understand the crazy things we can do. This did help in some way though.

 

4) exercise

- This was so helpful, I Trained for a marathon. I’m sure I was probably addicted to running as I have an obsessive personality. But this gave me a positive focus. 

5) living life!!!

- this is massive. When I was gambling I could justify spending thousands of pounds on some flashy lights. That’s mental.

when I did anything else i was always so frugal because I knew how much debt I had. Apart from alcohol. My brain made an exception. Basically anything to help me forget about my situation. 

But! If I spent money on something I liked it was soooo worth it. I went on holiday. I know that sounds stupid. But I did for a few days and it was cheap. And it was amazing. I’d denied myself that for years because I didn’t deserve it.

I’m not advocating that people do that. I’m just saying it’s helpful to spend money on things that actually make you happy. As long as you set a reasonable budget. And for me, spending money outside of gambling I’ve always been reasonable at. Good at, even. 

It doesn’t have to be money though. Given yourself permission to enjoy yourself. Go for a walk. Do exercise. Cook. Spend time with friends. I realised how much I’d been missing out on.

then I planned for the future. This helped so much to work towards something rather than just being obsessed with how much debt I was in. 

So, sorting out money was only one part of it. But I do stand by saying that it was really integral. Maybe that’s not for everyone. But for me, having that debt hanging over meant that I couldn’t move on with my life. This is my experience, and I haven’t lived yours. But maybe it helps.

 
Posted : 8th December 2020 3:13 pm
gettingbackontrack
(@gettingbackontrack)
Posts: 9
Topic starter
 
Posted by: Joydivider

Im just a little worried here that it reads like a placed promotion for a commercial company. 

Its made me uneasy as it doesnt discuss the core root of the problem and how you face recovery. 

It basically says hit rock bottom.... called named debt management company... all sorted...... tried exclusions etc but it was the dmp that sorted it....come on now!

A debt mangement programme doesnt block a person from gambling nor deal with the emotions on a recovery journey. 

I would suggest getting advice from the CAB and even speaking to your creditors first. Fees are involved with a commercial company and you have to decide if thats worth it. They dont have the automatic power to stop every claim or freeze interest if the creditor company wont accept the payment.  

Im going to stick my neck out here as it reads like a pure advertisement. I cant win but I will let the moderators decide. I dont mean to cause any offence but I will speak my mind when I read the way this is worded

Fees are involved with a commercial company but Payplan and stepchange are both charities. They don’t charge you for a dmp. 

you can speak to your creditors. I did initially to setup payment plans. But, I had so many that it was unmanageable. 

sure speak to CAB if you want to. I don’t think they have the same specialist advise nor can they speak to your creditors for you. 

i didn’t want to speak to CAB because I didn’t want to see someone face to face. I was too ashamed. 

 
Posted : 8th December 2020 3:18 pm
gettingbackontrack
(@gettingbackontrack)
Posts: 9
Topic starter
 

I joined the forum in 2018. I was in £20k debt, I thought that was rock bottom. And I wrote about it here: 

https://www.gamcare.org.uk/forum/new-members-intros-forum/lost-it-all-in-6-months/#post-131135

I thought that was rock bottom, it actually got so much worse. 

however- over the last 12 months. I’ve gambled once (£50) immediately self-excluded and have paid off £12,000.

I’m writing all this now because I wish that back when I wrote that first post I’d known this. I would have been a year ahead. But hey, I’m here now.  

 

 
Posted : 8th December 2020 3:25 pm
c43h
 c43h
(@c43h)
Posts: 607
 

I am not buying what you are selling here today and I don't think anyone else will be neither. On the contrary, I do not think you are doing that brand your flogging any favours at all...

Good luck!

 

 

 

 
Posted : 8th December 2020 3:33 pm
gettingbackontrack
(@gettingbackontrack)
Posts: 9
Topic starter
 

This is such a strange situation for me. That it’s making me happy. Genuine tears of joy actually. 

I first came to this forum 2 years ago and I was at the worst point in my life.

 

 Now, I’ve updated things when it’s going well and people don’t believe me because it sounds too good to be true.

That’s amazing. Ahh it really is.

This was not the reaction I was expecting at all. 

I genuinely wish everyone all the best with their struggles. I know how hard it can be. 

And- I know everyone is coming from a good place that they want to protect other people on the forum. 

P.s. I would make a terrible advert, look how long and rambling my writing is! 

Anyway, take care everyone. I’m going to update in a year anyway. 

 
Posted : 8th December 2020 3:48 pm
Chris.UK
(@chris-uk)
Posts: 887
 

@gettingbackontrack Good work so far.

I have also used Payplan in the past, exactly as OP posted, except I set a much lower repayment payment plan up. Mine was about £250 a month from memory.  They were really helpful and didn't charge me anything. They helped freeze the interest and wrote to everyone for me.

Also from memory they are the prop bono side of a solitors but I absolutely had no charges nad they didn't take anything either, unlike these IVA companies who include their fee in the repayment. Infact, it was the CAB who advised about doing an IVA and I chose Payplan. This was about 13 years ago.

I'm certainly not an advert but I have experience of this company and I too would recommend them.

Chris.

 

 
Posted : 8th December 2020 4:02 pm
Joydivider
(@joydivider)
Posts: 2156
 

Hi Getting back.

Ok thanks for getting back to us. I see you joined in 2018. Maybe Im just confused with this and youve caught me on the wrong foot.

I just think its mentioning the name and advising people to get onto them. I looked up some reviews and there were very bad ones.

Its nothing personal and we are talking it through. Maybe I have this wrong. Im just reading a free service possibly funded by the credit industry?....I will get back to you

I dont mean to cause offence. For some reason Ive been rubbed up the wrong way as you were emphasising the dmp and the name

Your post seemed to suggest that the dmp was the main thing that helped you stop gambling. Im confused on the back foot here...I will get back to you

All the best

 
Posted : 8th December 2020 4:21 pm
Joydivider
(@joydivider)
Posts: 2156
 

Ok If Chris has used them thats fine by me.

Ive jumped the starting pistol here. You are very welcome and for a moment I thought a computer bot or company rep was advertising a company.

I do apologise. How you word things is your choice on an open forum.

All the very best

 

 
Posted : 8th December 2020 4:55 pm
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