Well its my birthday today I’m 51 and another in lockdown however this one is different from last year. Yes i’m still a gambler but a gambler that does not gamble!! 50 days ago (ironic 50 for each year I have lived) was my last gamble. I finally broke down and told my husband and family. Best day ever ... I kept asking why didn’t i do that many years ago (i had 14 to choose from!!!) however i realise now there is no point raking up the past and asking why why why?? Its gone as has all the money I spent. I have been SO lucky that my family have supported me and I AM taking this opportunity of a new beginning SO gladly with open arms . I never want to go back to that dark place again. Yes it is difficult every day as you all know. Demons will be there always to tempt you so you need to get help. I have blocks ... i have told people ... i have spoken to councellors ... i have limited my access to money. If I could sell the feelings I have now and put them in a jar I would be a richer person than gambling the money that’s for sure !!! Weird isn’t it!! These feelings of freedom outway the feelings i had when gambling!! I am beginning to respect myself and am looking forward to my new life. To all those people who are struggling please get help . We only have ONE life please use it WISELY. Your family deserve it as well. Don’t be SELFISH. I realise now what I was doing and I am moving forwards now . Take care everyone and YOU can do this . You have a life LIVE it xx 😀
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