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Loxxie
(@loxxie)
Posts: 1838
 

You're so cleverrrrrrr

It's on both....??

1200  ....that confused me...then I realised what you meant.....so weird.....it all seems like a dream realy...although it all felt like a nightmare at the time ...how I counted those early days....and now....never really think about it. ....now it's just normal life...what ever that is ?

Glad you and Mrs fish had a break.....you only had two borders to cross ...it would have been a pleasure to buy you and Mrs a drink ....next time venture down...I'm trying to pencil couple days in early May...heading to your town to see sister...

I just can't beleive grandson approaching 2....lovely age...proper fun...

Another 2 little girls blessed to be under the fish families wings....respect to you both 

And I love this new email thing.....means a get a ding ding when I've been spoken to....perfect....although the bloody phone would have exploded in early days with all our nonsense....

Although I didn't realise my day count.....you've got me thinking about cake.....

Mart wouldn't have to spend hours creating one now that emojs are on site ?

over and out x

 
Posted : 26th April 2019 2:27 pm
 A 9
(@alan-135)
Posts: 503
Topic starter
 

Hello old friend :)) .

I really struggle to put my thought's down on your pages these day's , pages that have served me well in my fight with addiction and a far cry from the early day's when you'd be scribbled all over every couple of minutes or so :).

I remember well the late night banter sessions that took myself and many others on here through the dark times , laugh's, jokes ( usually my bad one's ) and the whole " We here for each other approach " was great . It displeased many on here and I'd been accused of hiding behind my wall of humor ? , the truth is I'd been so miserable because of what my life of addiction had caused that it was great to have humor in my life again , if it was about " Fake it till you make it " then it worked for many of my friends on here who remain gamble free alongside me today proving that sometimes the best medicine is indeed laughter :)) . 

The day I quit Gambling and took back control of my life was like being reborn , the thing's I'd done were admitted to and the consequences accepted , that old black slate with all the wrong doings will never be wiped away like some outstanding bar tab but day by day the script does fade . 

Even today I accept I still cause a ripple of Unacceptance  on the forum , it's not intentional but it's ok :)) , I don't run by any set of rules for recovery , preferring instead to say it as I'm living it one day at a time  and as Dunc's always remind's " Recovery is bespoke " so I can't tell someone " This is the way you must go about recovery " that's not my place and all I can say is what it was like for me in any given situation on any given day . 

I don't think in the big picture of my life I'm doing that bad old friend , like a big red carpet life still presents it's up's and down's before me but that's what life does right ? and in the 4 yrs since we first formed our alliance we've still not returned to our old way's which is good , there are of course as always things I'd like to be different but I'm no longer a dreamer of fortune :)) , I don't get to wear a superhero cape but I do get to wear the same clothes as Gorden Ramsay at work and another 4 inches on my @@@@ wouldn't go amiss but then again 11's enough for anyone right ?  I wish :))  ( there goes the humor again ) . 

I laugh at myself  and I laugh at life and all it brings with it and think were all a bunch of oversensitive , paranoid loonies on here myself included but you  know what ? I salute each and everyone of my brothers and sisters for just having the B@lls to be here :)) . 

Talk to you soon dear diary :)) xx    

This post was modified 5 years ago by A 9
 
Posted : 16th May 2019 1:01 pm
(@Anonymous)
Posts: 0
 

Shhhhh

Wanna buy a mars bar?. Got some going cheap

X

 
Posted : 16th May 2019 3:49 pm
 A 9
(@alan-135)
Posts: 503
Topic starter
 

Baaaaaaaaal  :)) . 

Do you know what old buddy that's just really made me laugh , for some reason the other day I didn't get a chance to reply to your post regarding the episode in the Gym and for one fleeting moment though " Should I ask him if the Mars bar in his back pocket broke his fall " ?? ..... But thought better of it in the end , the restraint I had to find nearly killed me :)) . 

Cheers Mate and truly hope your well :)) xx

BTW , how long's a mars bar these day's ? They seem to have shrunk since I was a kid .......along with many thing's in my life :)) .  

 
Posted : 16th May 2019 4:45 pm
(@deano18)
Posts: 20
 

They should definitely have some kind of mark yourself safe button on the site after it’s revamp. I hope this will land on your diary, or I haven’t got a clue where it will go lol

just popped in to say hi really  I’ll open a diary at some point but think I may need to find my way around first? 

Thing is since I stopped gambling I can’t really think of much to write about? Do I write about before or after?   

Have a good day my old mucker x

 
Posted : 16th May 2019 6:29 pm
 A 9
(@alan-135)
Posts: 503
Topic starter
 
Posted by: Jason58199

They should definitely have some kind of mark yourself safe button on the site after it’s revamp. I hope this will land on your diary, or I haven’t got a clue where it will go lol

just popped in to say hi really  I’ll open a diary at some point but think I may need to find my way around first? 

Thing is since I stopped gambling I can’t really think of much to write about? Do I write about before or after?   

Have a good day my old mucker x

Hello me old mate and great to hear from you :))

If you get a diary then I get pinged on my emails to tell me you've been leaving thing's on my diary , I usually have my phone on vibrate and in my pocket but because nobody talks to me anymore I can't even get any pleasure that way ? :(( .......... Apart From Bal today that is ( cheers Bal you made an old man very happy ) :)) .

As for you not having anything to write about ? .......Well , it never stopped you before did it ? and if I'm honest  the word's " Verbal Diarrhoea " spring to mind  :)) . 

I'm sure you could put your expertise to good use , even if people wanted a quick course on house building you'd be great :)) . 

Take care old buddy and look forward to a mahoosive post as our Loxxie would say :)) . 

Kisses xx 

 
Posted : 16th May 2019 8:38 pm
(@Anonymous)
Posts: 0
 

Always a pleasure and never a chore Alan. Did i see my old mate the brickie make an appearance. Legend x

This post was modified 5 years ago by Anonymous
 
Posted : 17th May 2019 6:50 am
Loxxie
(@loxxie)
Posts: 1838
 

It's a good job I get email notifications. ...reminds me to pop back and see what's occurring ?

Speck Mr fish got it set for every diary....just so his phone vibrates in his pocket ! ?

Nice to see you old boys having a banter....

Size of today's mars bars ? Why are men always obsessed about size.....it's quality. ..not quantity ?

Me and mine are all fine and dandy. ...pubs flying...actually at a capacity i can only just cope with...meeting with landlord this afternoon...time for some improvments here....

Anddddddd it's going to happen. ....

Rent I've paid every month since confessing to him about my addiction will cover it...and be used solely for structural improvments. ....a permanent reminder to me.....about how far I've come.....his words...loxxie....you've paid x number of pounds in rent...let's get together and see what you want some ??

Proud moment ?

Soooo ....about to be dipping my toes into those nice people at the planning office. ....bet there will be more red tape than a marathon finishing line ?

Not bothered....Will just deal with it...

Really can't imagine my old addiction days now....I do send my head back there sometimes.....it's good to take a little look back....to remember how bad life was....

My daughter....the one who pulled me up about my addiction gave me a lovely plaque "only look back to see how far you've come "..and that's what I like to do....

But for now.....my addiction leaves me at peace.....

I will get round to writing to you lovely chaps personally....the ones who caught me when I landed here broken and distraught. ....I've got to invest in a gamcare sat nav first .....just to find you all on here ?

Anyhoooos....I've got to go and address a trashed bar/kitchen from last night's shift....the part of my job knowbody sees....but it's the part that keeps the cogs turning......

Take care boys....big hugs to you all.....and much respect to you all for how far you've all come.....mwahhhhh

????????????

 

 
Posted : 17th May 2019 7:56 am
 A 9
(@alan-135)
Posts: 503
Topic starter
 

Morning Loxxie , Morning Bal , Morning all :)).

It's like The Gang's all here this morning ( well almost ) just need the cakemaker and a couple of others and we'd have a full house :)) . 

I reckon Jason keep's a secret watch on this place coz he always seem to pop up at the right moment , I deffo think he needs to get his @rs back here as he has a lot to offer :)) . 

Glad everything's going so well Loxxie and just goes to show what's achievable when we set our mind to something , all we had our mind on years ago was the next bet , so like you say look how far we've come Loxxie :)) . 

How big's this extension gonna be then loxx ? or is it an erection going up instead of out ? , The brickie may be able to help you out with that , ive heard he's good with his hand's although it could be just a rumour ? , Mart could decorate , Bal could stock the Bar and I'll put on a fish night ? :))

Talking about your trashed bar ? , that's the bit the punters don't see and I'm in here late most night's cleaning down as I just couldn't face it in the morning :(( . 

It's sooo good to hear from you all and many thank's to you all for making my buzzer go off multiple times over the last 24 hrs .

Like your daughters plaque say's guy's " Only look back to see how far youv'e come " and I'm off to put my plaque up now  " Loxxie say's Size isn't everything " there It's official , I just hope your guy's at the planning dept feel the same Loxxie :)) . 

Lot's of love and kisses to all xxxxxx  

 
Posted : 17th May 2019 8:38 am
(@Anonymous)
Posts: 0
 

Morning all.

Good good good good vibrations. (Be careful how you spell that one bal).

Sure the brickie will be along in a bit. Half 10 finish on a friday and straight in the pub.

Party at Loxxies it is. Mart may bring barry along.

Good luck with the planning.

Wagon wheel anyone x

 
Posted : 17th May 2019 8:55 am
 A 9
(@alan-135)
Posts: 503
Topic starter
 
Posted by: Bal

Morning all.

Good good good good vibrations. (Be careful how you spell that one bal).

Sure the brickie will be along in a bit. Half 10 finish on a friday and straight in the pub.

Party at Loxxies it is. Mart may bring barry along.

Good luck with the planning.

Wagon wheel anyone x

:)) , This exactly goes to show why we should never be allowed as a group on Gamcare ever again , 5 min's back and we have Extensions , Erections, Vibrations and Salutations all in a couple of post's and that really fill's me with " Trepidation " :)) . 

xx 

 
Posted : 17th May 2019 9:40 am
 A 9
(@alan-135)
Posts: 503
Topic starter
 

Did you not say on your post " I know from experience doing it without GA is difficult and relapse is eventually guaranteed " ? . 

 
Posted : 17th May 2019 2:49 pm
(@Anonymous)
Posts: 0
 

Stick to your own posts. Wise words

 
Posted : 17th May 2019 3:56 pm
DeterminedDan
(@determineddan)
Posts: 1083
 

Having read today’s posts, it’s quite obvious that you both (Alan and ALN) have differing opinions on how recovery from gambling should and could be tackled. 

The ironic thing is that you’re both currently doing tremendously well in your own individual recoveries. 

Having only read this particular thread (so far) this evening, I can only go on what I’ve seen here. But judging from Alan’s first comment, I’m guessing something was said somewhere else on another diary?

I think it’s probably for the best that you both don’t interact on here with each other in future. Both myself and ALN have had our difference on opinions and we’ve both agreed to avoid each other’s diaries from now on as we ended up being of no help to each other in the end as we couldn’t really agree on very much. 

However, that doesn’t stop me from having a great amount of respect for what he’s achieved so far in his recovery. I’m glad that whatever he has chosen to do is working for him. 

I don’t believe for one minute that Alan has any ulterior motives. That’s ridiculous in my opinion. But I’m taking that as an angry, heat of the moment comment that I expect to be retracted at a later time. 

I don’t want to dictate to either of you what you should do or who you should interact with, I’m merely trying to put a few things into perspective. You both seem like decent human beings. 

 
Posted : 17th May 2019 5:12 pm
(@deano18)
Posts: 20
 

I do watch from afar, I’m not here that often anymore. But when I do come I check for the guys and gals of old. I’m still trying to get my head around the update seems less user friendly?   I did want to post something yesterday about the thread that was closed, I think the ability to share private messages or information has been around a long time, way before we even started posting. From what I’ve read and experienced some members have truly bonded beyond these walls.  I did used to be a member of the Facebook group and can honestly say I don’t know if I would be coming on 3 years gamble free without them (your self and others on her included)  I think at one point there was around 47 members in the group and can honestly say I never saw an argument in there.  Many are still my friends on Facebook and although we don’t speak that often their still there if we need  each other.  I think sometimes all we need to do is have that extra connection, something as addicts we didn’t have.  I honestly thought I was the only compulsive gambler in the world until I found this place on the back of a scratch card.  Good to see the legend bavalarrrr and our Loxie still knocking around, if I can find out how to find their diary’s I’ll send the a post. 

Really I just popped on to see if you’ve got battered chips down south yet?

 
Posted : 17th May 2019 7:15 pm
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