So here i am 7 days in , it might not be a lot but in terms of gambling it can be alot of money not wasted , so i'm a little proud of myself but still feel guilt a little..........
Today i just plan as i have the past 6 just go with the flow and avoid any thoughts of gambling even though in my mind i know it's not possible as all the steps are in place , so i can say now i will get through today and make it 7 full days .....
I hope everyone is doing well and battling hard each day or hour at a time 🙂 😉
So here i am 7 full days GF and now onto the 8th , this morning i've woken up with less guilt about though i'm sure it will come into my head a few times during the day which isn't a bad thing as it reminds me why i'm here and why i'm going GF.
I'm just hoping this week my own mind will become a little clearer and stop dwelling on it and focus on going foward which i am doing as much as possible but i'd love to focus and stay focused ...I guess it's only myself that can try and power through and find what suits or works for me and do it.
Juse as a note and to fellow readers i only find it easy no to G..... as i've took away any temptation and have every block in place to prevent me so it really does ease your mind or at least put the thoughts out of it really quickly as you know you just can even if the urge is strong 😉
I hope everyone is doing aswell as they can possibly do also.
Well that is day 8 over and for whatever reason still getting that feeling of guilt rush over me , at this stage i'm starting to hope it would leave as i want to move forward but i guess it's like getting a reminder why i'm on this journey and of course having a quick read through my own posts helps loads as i might not show much emotion in them but it takes me back from day 1 until today so i hope it helps in 6 months time as a reminder .
Well today has been just a normal day no real thoughts about betting just still the lingering of guilt of how stupid i was or can be but i'm going along each day now getting stronger i hope , will i face temptation at some point i'm not sure i hope not as i can't see how or when i'll be near it so i hope my days will become easier and start not being so hard on myself for letting myself down and see the positive's that every day GF i'm actually the winner for that day as i've kept my money in my pocket 😉
Day 14, 😁
Well another day over and I was able to enjoy various sports all over the weekend without any guilty feeling and more importantly no urges!!!!
I am well aware 14 days isn't much as each day could bring a new challenge but I'm also proud too that I've feeling better within myself and that guilty feeling of messing up is getting easier by the day and more or less gone.
I hope everyone is doing well and let the fight continue 😎😜😁
Day 17 ,
Just another day going past with ease which i'm really pleased about .
Had no feelings of guilt for a few days then late last night i got a wave of it after 11 and it was like a reminder that i still have a way to go to save back what i have lost .
I've now 20% saved back on what i've lost and i can also look at it as gained too as no doubt i would of lost alot more than that never mind saving anything back so i have to remind myself on it that it might seem like a slow process repairing the damage but it's the correct way and have to learn to no longer be hard on myself about it as i need to move on mentally now about the loss and give myself a longer time frame on replacing it , but i think with a clear head i've done excellent .
Well it seems my days are counting up rather quick and i'm doing it with ease at the moment anyway the only thing i still get a hard reminder of is guilt and sometimes i fear this will push me into 1 more time but i'm staying strong and ignoring it now but like everyone says it's 1 day at a time and 1 fight everyday no matter how hard or easy it is for you.