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kaskade1
(@kaskade1)

hi there, my names Abby and at the cliche of sounding like I’m in a meeting I am a gambling addict. 

Let me take you back to when it all started a brief encounter you might say. The short version is, I had a boyfriend who I used to play bingo with. When I first started going I would only play a little bit and this soon developed to the point I would win and shove the whole amount back in. Cause you’re always going to win right? Of course not. Constantly chasing. This eventually led on to online slots and developing an addiction that I always thought was ridiculous before. Silly old me. 

This relationship ended badly, but the one thing that didn’t end was the gambling. Fast forward a year later, I was spending all my wages, getting payday loans and racked up my overdraft to the point I couldn’t pay it back. I had to then get a loan from the bank to pay it.  I won’t use my broken heart as an excuse but I do feel like at the time this filled the void. 

I met someone else 2 years later, who I’m still with now and although my broken heart was fixed, my gambling wasn’t. 

theres a lot more to my story, but here I am today with a gamstop ban on all accounts. It’s been a few days and I haven’t stopped thinking about the fact I have done that. I almost miss it? How is this possible? Isit psychological? I used to think I wasn’t addicted because I didn’t do it everyday. Only because I couldn’t afford too...❤️

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Posted : 13th July 2020 2:52 pm
Kevthekev40
(@kevthekev40)

Hiya Abby 

Don't worry we're all in the same boat here but its ready to sink and if we keep gambling we will lose everything even ourselves. Its hard but its got to be gamble free and you've started the right way just take it one day at a time and like the rest of us your journey has begun 

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Posted : 13th July 2020 4:31 pm
Bladesman
(@bladesman)

Hi Abby, thanks for sharing you story. Like Kev says you have joined a club where we all have a lot in common and can relate to each others stories. You have taken the first step my coming on here and registering with Gamstop and want to stop this evil in your life. I have been on here a month now gamble free after many years of wasting my life and money but I hope by starting your journey you feel better. Another block you could try in Betblocker, it's an app I have on my phone which stops access to any gambling website, even the National Lottery, and can be set for up to 5 years which I have done and once installed it can't be removed. You will miss it at first but each day it will slowly get easier and think of the positives of getting through each day without it. Good luck!

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Posted : 13th July 2020 4:44 pm
Jadiebby85
(@jadiebby85)

Hi Abby, welcome to the forums and well done for being on here and trying to change! Signing up to gamstop is huge! I told my mum and partner I had signed up twice before I actually did, I did and I’m 64 days gamble free! It does become easier but you will find it’s very up and down, by that I mean 1 week is great the next will be tough! Have you thought about keeping a diary about recovery? Also on here there is a course that is cognitive behaviour therapy and I’ve just finished it! It’s called game change and it’s really changed the way I feel and my thought processes, it’s definitely worth trying! The course is 8 modules you do 1 per week and then after you’ve finished you’ll have a call with a therapist the modules do not take long to complete either! I wish you all the luck to beat this jadie x

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Posted : 13th July 2020 5:02 pm
kaskade1
(@kaskade1)

Thank your for your kind words Kev! It’s definitely a step in the right direction just need to mentally stop thinking about  it. I’m sure the missing it won’t last long...well I hope 🤞 

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Posted : 13th July 2020 6:12 pm
kaskade1
(@kaskade1)

Hi Jadie, thanks for the good advice I will definitely look into the therapy. I have had counselling before but I’m not sure my counsellor was any good. I hope all is well and well done for being 64 days gamble free. It’s definitely a difficult thing to do. I didn’t want to do it either but I made myself. Gotta start somewhere. Good luck and keep on going. The recovery process isn’t easy but you made the right choice x

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Posted : 13th July 2020 6:14 pm
kaskade1
(@kaskade1)

Hi blades. Thank you for your kind words and support. It means a lot. I know we are all in the same boat I always thought my problems weren’t as bad anyone else’s and sometimes I feel like I don’t belong on here but I obviously do o wouldn’t meet likeminded people like yourself. I heard about the software. I didn’t think it was normal to miss it but obviously it is. Well done on being a month gamble free a massive achievement and one you should be proud of. X

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Posted : 13th July 2020 6:17 pm
Kevthekev40
(@kevthekev40)

Hiya Abby 

This is the place for you like minded people who are all going through the same process but just at different stages. At least it's somewhere you can get help and support and have your own input helping others through what you've gone through as your experiences are worth the chat to help

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Posted : 13th July 2020 8:23 pm
kaskade1
(@kaskade1)

Absolutely Kev, I couldn’t agree more. I appreciate everyone’s journeys and what they are doing to get through it. Onwards and upwards. I’m saving for a mortgage at the moment this is why it’s so important for me to change my life 

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Posted : 13th July 2020 9:22 pm
Kevthekev40
(@kevthekev40)

That's the spirit 

Atleast you've got a reason to stop and a big reason at that! Good luck to you and I'd rather have a house than give the gambling company's all that money they just laugh at us mugs but it wouldn't be that if it was there family gambling is a evil vice that wrecks life's as well as causes a lot off suicide it's that severe and the Lord's gambling report how many life's are took through gambling harm and the effect it has on the wider families. Even a judge said that gambling industry's feed addicts like a drug as they jailed someone who stole over a hundred thousand pound from his friend to fund his gambling addiction. Things are going to change in the gambling company's as even now credit is banned from being used to gamble. And the industry must take account off vulnerable addicts and it not just be down to the gambler as there not down to feed there addiction like a drug as if you win to much there not 2 minutes in limiting your account,  have a look at the justice for punters page it's a good read and honest to the bone 

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Posted : 13th July 2020 9:39 pm
Kevthekev40
(@kevthekev40)

Hiya Abby 

Not seen you posting is everything going okay? You know even if you relapse come for support as we're all only human and these things take time I really hope your ok

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Posted : 21st July 2020 12:37 pm
kaskade1
(@kaskade1)

Hi ya Kev. Everything is good. I will post today and give you a proper update. Thanks for asking 😊

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Posted : 21st July 2020 2:49 pm
Kevthekev40
(@kevthekev40)

No problem Abby 

I was just having a look at posts and noticed you hadn't been on so was just abit worried not in a bad way but its good to talk to people who understand that's what got me through the last couple off month. Keep up the good work and be proud off yourself 

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Posted : 21st July 2020 7:53 pm
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