Starting my diary thread

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(@luket)
Posts: 6
Topic starter
 

Hi everyone, this is my diary for recovery as i am in my first week and i feel like documenting it will really help get my feelings out and have a more clear less clogged mind. 

My problems started for me 2 years ago, i am currently 20 turning 21 soon but when i was 18 I discovered football betting through being a big fan of football. I found myself going to my local team games placing a accumulator of like £1-£5 nothing stupid and watching the game and checking my account after. This became a weekly thing and i thought nothing of it until i started checking my phone in the game and being more focused on my bet then the game i went to watch. I started betting with higher amounts and becoming a angrier person with my betting. I quickly depleted  my spending account month after month. Things got worse when i started university i got my student loan and since i was living at home i only had to pay for food and my bus travel this meant i had a lot of spare money.

i work a student type job so i earn a good amount for myself month in month out and i found myself gambling more and more since i had the funds to now. Quickly that changed and i couldnt even go on nights out as i was struggling for money. It hit me that maybe i have a problem but i just kept self denying and kept going. I then discovered overdrafts, something i never ever thought of until i hit desperation i took out a student overdraft and suddenly felt like i had all my money back when in fact i just dug myself a deeper and deeper hole. Since going into lockdown i was put on furlough and found myself bored. I was gambling daily lying to my family and friends about my money as i did win quite a lot during furlough and i was getting a lot of money back in my account and part of me wanted to stop but the excitement and thrill of winning got me hooked. I lost all that money and more and hit rock bottom. I finally confessed to my girlfriend that i had a problem and i had spent thousands on gambling i felt so vulnerable but yet so free of my mind. She supported me and even thought it was only a couple days ago shes helped me so much. I am now self excluded from all uk betting sites for 5 years and although i took this big step quickly i am more than happy to do so. This part of my journey of becoming financially stable again has only just begun but i feel ready to share my story with others. I still haven’t told my family yet but i feel like i will soon. Thank you taking the time to read this and i hope my story encourages young people to speak up. Luke

ps sorry for bad grammar / spelling i suffer from dyslexia 

 
Posted : 19th July 2020 10:20 pm
duncan.mac
(@duncan-mac)
Posts: 4422
 

Luke 

welcome to the forum, a place full of like minded folk who share the same goal to arrest the next punt and live a life without destruction and self created devastation not only for themselves but the folk they hold dear.

to recognise that you are a compulsive gambler at such a young age is outstanding be proud of that and yes become an ambassador for others who may be able to find the courage to follow suit. I gambled compulsively for more than twenty years before I sought help and without doubt the compulsion to gamble is progressive in it’s nature, the losses grow and the lying and deceiving with it. 
keep talking about it, never underestimate how powerful it will become if left to grow.

if you never place another bet in your life the outcome will be profound, you will never lose, for us abstinence gifts a win every day we make that choice.

 Thanks for sharing your story 

abstain and maintain 

Duncs 

 
Posted : 20th July 2020 5:52 am

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