It's been a couple of weeks since my last post. I feel great, my life is in such a better place to the one it was in a few weeks ago. Yes the journey is a long one but I feel like I am making headway now having been on the straight and narrow for six weeks. Of course there is more to come on this gambling journey but I am reminded every day how the gambler inside me was an alien, someone I do not recognise. It is this thought process that has probably been most helpful when trying to come to terms with the money I lost. The fact of that matter is that money never was mine, it was the compulsive gamblers money. As I mentioned in my last blog update, treating myself to little luxuries on pay day has also helped me build a positive relationship with money again.
Today I also started a new journey - starting the first positive step towards being debt free. It's a massively scary thing to do - ringing up debt collection agencies but today I finally plucked up the courage, something that has only been possible due to my own self realisation of being a recovering gambling addict. I have managed to negotiate quite a lot of my debt down too so overall definitely a "win".
The light at the end of the tunnel definitely more visible than at the start.
Until next time,
wow i also did the debt thing today lol and i feel the same as you do im only 8 days gf but something just clicked in me last week 16 years of gambling everyday and that has never happend so i feel positive about this well done on your month gf thats great keep it up and i also bought a little something when i got paid it made a hell of a difference its amazing how i could easy throw £100 into a machine in 1 hour but wouldnt spend £10 on a take away or a new purse wow i dont want to be that person ever again so disgusting
Hi well done on 6 weeks gamble free and also taking the courage to contact debt collection agencies.
I used a charity called Stepchange they have a very informative website with advice support and tools to becoming debt free. I found them very helpful and also took a debt management plan with them they contacted all my creditors to relieve the stress, the creditors froze all interest i should not be debt free this year. The website it worth a look.
Lou x
Stace, fantastic news that you too have decided to make that brave and very positive step towards financial freedom. Quitting the gambling and talking to your debtors is really positive step for you. Keep up the great work!
Also it's amazing isn't it regarding how far money goes when we stop gambling, can totally relate to your comments on that.
Hi Loux,
Great advise, yes I have heard of step change and I did briefly deal with them. I have personally found it much easier dealing directly with agencies and debtors mainly because of the scope to negotiate. I have managed to negotiate a reduction of more than £2,000 in the amount of debt I owe.
Step change are a brilliant charity and I would recommend them to anyone who doesn't have the confidence to go in "hard and fast" as I myself did not have that confidence a while ago. But one example, I have a debt of £550 that I managed to negotiate down to £250 with monthly payments of £25.
There is a lot of flexibility out there and scope to negotiate, I am going to write a separate blog post about my experiences of reducing my debt in the hope that perhaps it could help others out there.
Its great youve managed to do that, yes theres no way i would have been able to even contact them so stepchange was a great help for me me,but well done for managing to negotiate them x
Loux
hi well done on getting your life back on track
just a word of warning on the little luxuries as it sounds like you are maybe only 1 or 2 months in i would avoid them
its too early to start rewarding yourself , this is where complacency builds in the sub conscious before you know it you will be thinking about trying to "win" some more money for more luxuries and back down the rabbit hole you will go
i would say at 6 months get something small as a reward , 12 months something bigger , 24 months is when you can buy something fancy
in-between use the money to settle the debt faster
Hi Max,
Some good advise, however I think you may confusing my idea of "little luxuries". Prior to stopping the gambling I would buy the cheapest food possible and then gamble the rest of my money away. Sometimes leaving me with less than £5 for two days which would leave me with no choice but to eat instant noodles.
For example I have recently started getting into arts and crafts again so I have started to reward myself on pay day with a few items that I want to add to my arts and craft collection. I also recently treated myself to a jumper and a pair of jeans.
We all have our own personal experiences of recovery however I have found that these little luxuries have kept me going as they constantly remind me of the importance of money - something I was never aware of when I was gambling. In fact buying myself these little treats serve as a constant warning that if I ever go back down the gambling rabbit hole again I won't be able to treat myself.
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