A difficult week with lots of self criticisms has been ended with the news that my father has bowel cancer.
Tears flowed earlier but in a strange way it has moved me away from self pity to right - lets deal with this.
Perhaps it has moved me in the right direction. As yet i dont know.
Has it given me a new purpose in life. As yet i dont know
Will i deal with this - too blooming right.
Am i confused - too blooming right.
Opened the christmas whisky present and contemplating.
Am i rabbiting - probably
What issues do i have at the mo - none. My family is more important.
Still await my results and the treatment proposed for my father.
Strange week. Work is very quiet but due to pick up this week.
Off to London on monday for a meeting and which i will meet my son afterwards for bagels in Brick Lane then beers. He then goes to Oz for 9 months for work. At 24 good luck to him.
Tonight i feel nicely relaxed with the open fire on and a large dram
Thank you for your kind words Murlo. My hospital letter came through and said no cancer. A great sigh of relief.
Had a birthday last week to which Mrs Bal and i had the day off. 5 mile walk around Thetford Forest together. Fantastic weather and fantastic company. No presents from the kids but they made me the most fantastic chocolate cake. Time spent, effort spent meant so much to me. A gesture for which i am truly thankful.
Nice evening followed with an indian in the company of mrs bal.
This weekend a night away at a 5 star hotel to celebrate our wedding anniversary on sunday.
My father goes into hospital today for a blood transfusion pending an operation to remove a cancerous growth on his bowel tomorrow. His elderly years and diminishing health make this a difficult time for all.
Working at home today but in reality struggling to focus on getting anything done.
The house is peaceful at the moment except the wind blowing down the chimney.
I will leave with a final message of how sad i was for a celebrity to feel so low that they ended life at the weekend and how much media coverage this has generated
BUT PLEASE REMEMBER
12 veterans a day commit suicide which the media rarely reports on.