Not the sentimental type but my local gym has 6 large screen wall mounted TVs on the wall & last week one of them was showing Goodwood televised meeting. My Mrs had just taken out an upgrade as her mobile phone contract had ended. She got her new iphone and gave me her old one. It took her ages to explain the functions & how they worked having only analogue phones experience. Her & my daughter share Apple music ( some kind of deal you can share with family members ) & after the 50th explanation i grasped how to use it. Coldplay I WILL FIX YOU seemed to ease the pain for me as i stood on the treadmill face to face with bookmakers, tipsters & price updates staring me in the face.Who knows maybe one day i too will become accustomed to wireless earplugs as opposed to thin wires tucked down my vest.
Trying Hard To re-connect To Todays World
Trying Hard To re-connect To Todays World
Yup, you got it in one here - spot on!
Hey - congrats on pretty much doing a whole year gamble free! Our day counts are pretty similar - however our personalities seem to differ somewhat as I gush with sentimentality! Probably explains why I am such an avid George Michael fan :o)
Yes, FIX YOU by Coldplay - someone at my GA meeting also referenced that track as hugely inspirational to their recovery and helps to ground them when the need some intervention of that nature...
It's weird isn't it - gambling is something we head to because we are broken in some way, yet when the opportunity presents itself to return to good, working order... it's so d**n hard and tiresome! And many of us go back to being broken because it's easier!
Well don't want to make too many grandiose statements but I guess this is reflective of the state of modern day society to a degree!
Anyway keep up the good work! Congrats again!
PS - fancy showing Goodwood in the gym! Football and that I understand but the horses is a bridge too far if you ask me! Bit strange! :o)
I remember gambling all my money away one of many times.
This particular time it was money saved for an engagement ring for my wife. I took a third job (on top of my other two) and scrabbled around to pull some money together for another ring - I gave myself 6 months...
After 6 months because I kept gambling I had saved up a paltry amount of money. I bought the cheapest ring I could find on the internet which looked somewhat similar to the one I had originally had in mind. It was a end of line find reduced from £500 to £200.
It looks cheap to be honest... Anyway I proposed to my wife and she said yes. I was so embarrassed she'd find out one day about the reduction so after a while I purposely left my computer screen open on the page where the ring was advertised, I left it open in such a way that the original price could be seen but not the reduced price. She came across it when walking past and I blushed and said I was just reminiscing on good times and mistakenly left the page open on the ring.
It was no mistake, it was a calculated move on my part. I was hoping she would tell her friends it cost the original price when they inevitably natter during their coffee mornings.
This is what gambling can do to you.
This is how manipulative it can make you become.
In the throws of addiction I thought my actions were justified, but they were not. I should have recognised what type of person gambling was making me become over time, as it ground me down and drained morality from me.
In all honesty my wife loves the ring and isn't price-conscious when it comes to things like that...
But the point is the what was supposed to be a romantic milestone in our lives ended up being a debacle, thanks to me and my addiction.
Curve ball, odd ball that's what i am, bit of a joke really. Memory ain't what it used to be. I need a break from fantastic achievement anniversaries & celebrations. Gonna back off for a while, maybe letting it all hang out & washing dirty linen in public isn't such a good idea. Maybe there'll come a time when i'll want to come back in the meantime i'll take Just For Today mindset & carry on. Man of a thousand diaries couldn't even figure out the basics of how to start one. A stark reminder of how i'm so out of touch with today's world.
Sincere Best Wishes
Yes I think I understand your reasons for taking a break...
For me, Gamcare's acts as a tool by which I can insert my sickness and it is converted into wellness (to a certain degree) - however at times I feel I have reached a point in my recovery where the roles seem to reverse, lately I've also been thinking this could be one of those times.
If anything, this in itself could be and should be an inspiration to others (struggling and new to this) that things can get better, you can be well again... Life is constantly changing - as is the role of Gamcare in my life along with that.
Take care all x
Don't ruin your summers with a punt.
And potentially your Christmases... Know what I mean?!
Take things one day at a time and look after yourselves x
I too have been away for a while and can only imagine you are taking a break. You are very well liked and respected and we all hope you are well. My guess is that you are perhaps fighting the darkness but I am sure you are not gambling. Come and say hello when you are ready. Congratulations on your imminent 12 months. I am catching you up day by day.