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captain46
(@captain46)

2 days without gambling for me, never tried to stop completely before, only to limit myself to advance sports bets but have taken advice to try and stop completely as I cant just stick to sports bets, end up doing other random bets at bookmakers and lose all my money.

Yesterday I went through the pain of watching sports and correctly predicting some results with no money on them. Today I forced myself not to go into bookies and get a football coupon. Lunchtime I just wandered aimlessly and after work forced myself to come straight home and not via bookies.

Hope it gets easier each day.

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Posted : 18th January 2010 7:44 pm
Curly10
(@curly10)

It does get easier Captain.

I'm like you in that i think i have a decent knowledge of most sports and that i could make this pay. I've no discipline however and if i walk in a bookies to back one football team or one golfer i cannot help but back 6 dogs whilst i am in there.

I've found that sport is much more enjoyable when i have not had a bet on it. A lot less stressful as well.

I hope you find the strength to give up gambling. You have made a good start signing up here.

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Posted : 18th January 2010 8:08 pm
maxylou
(@maxylou)

Just wanted to say hi.

Congratulations on taking the first steps,

I had a diary this year which i forgot i had so i have updated it tonight with whats happened since my last attempt to stop.

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Posted : 18th January 2010 9:00 pm
Jasmine
(@jasmine)

Hi Captain,

Welcome to the diaries. I find them invaluable in my recovery. I post whatever I like...not necessarily gambling related but stuff that may have lead me back into the arms of gambling previously.

Now....get on with those pastimes!

Jas x

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Posted : 18th January 2010 9:04 pm
captain46
(@captain46)

Day 3 and I cant sleep, have a sick feeling in my stomach - there is football on tonight, I dont know the odds and havent made a selection, this feels so unnatural.

If you go into a grocers and you like apples but grapes make you sick, you dont buy the grapes, so why cant I just go into a bookmakers and only bet what I intend to. I will track tonights scores even though I wont have bet on them, will be in mode of hoping there is a result which would have meant I lost.

There must be a way of doing this that someone has managed...

Thanks for taking time to read my diary and responding folks.

Curly - you must get the grocer scenario, sounds like you have had similar experience to me

Jas/Maxy - thanks for support on chat. I'll be back doing the pastimes when I get home from work tonight - better than being at work but not riveting! ( Well ok there are some books I read that I cant put down )

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Posted : 19th January 2010 3:04 am
winningpost
(@winningpost)

aye aye captain...im in same position as you mate...i tried to moderate my betting to fixed odds on a saturday and Irish Lotto as was losing too much but failed miserably.i dont think you can be a selective gambler when you are as compulsive as us on these forums mate..only my opinion..hope you are bet free today and best of luck..

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Posted : 19th January 2010 4:48 pm
Curly10
(@curly10)

Howdy captain,

I'm like a kid in a sweet shop when i go to the bookies mate. Why settle for a quarter of strawberry bonbons, when you can have a quarter of sherbert lemons, a quarter of pear drops and a mars bar as well. Trouble is eating all those sweets would make me feel ill. A bit like gambling really!

It does get easier though captain. I remember watching Ireland play in France a couple of days after i decided to quit. It was weird! I really enjoy watching the football now though without urging players to miss so not to down my first goalscorer bet.

Best of luck to you skips.

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Posted : 19th January 2010 6:44 pm
captain46
(@captain46)

Day 3 - work is demanding and busy so I dont think about gambling at work. Lunchtime is bad, wander around and check my watch all the time, go to the gym so dont need a long walk to stay fit! Very little to do at lunchtime near where I work, need to get out of work for a break but nothing to do if I dont go to the bookies or the library, and I'm sick of going to the library too often as obviously its always the same.

Walk past bookies, dont actually want to bet, but want to go in and read the sports section of the paper, want to know whats happening, be involved, feel like I'm on the outside. I know there's football tonight but I dont know all the matches, all the odds, team news etc.

Drive home from work fast to avoid going via bookies, luckily dont get stopped for speeding.

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Posted : 19th January 2010 8:12 pm
BlockedOut
(@blockedout)

Hi Captain nice meeting you in chat this evening. Walk on by the bookies and dont think or try not think about just browsing the form papers. Last time I did somthing similar (playing free rolls online) it cost me 1000s over xmas and new year. Drive on home as you say and relax in the fact you have for 1 day controlled your urge and not fed the gambling machine! Stay strong all the best Blocked.

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Posted : 19th January 2010 9:05 pm
Curly10
(@curly10)

Hi Captain.

Good to see you in the chatroom earlier. It was only my 3rd visit there but i think it helps to know you are not alone in this fight.

Just wanted to re-iterate that you can watch sports without gambling. Two months ago i would not have watched any sport without having an 'interest' but it is not a problem now. Keep at it and it will get easier.

I'll keep posting on here mate so don't go disappearing on me!

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Posted : 19th January 2010 9:23 pm
.
 .
(@)

Hi Captain,

Just read your diary and can relate a lot to your plight and the urges that you are feeling.

I would not expect anyone to read all of my diary. But I feel it may help you to know you are not alone in dealing with the football fixed odds addiction that we share.

We all think we are experts don't we??!!

It does eat away at you, and you are doing well to avoid old habits of lunchtime and after work trips to the bookies.

Try self-exclusion, if you haven't already.

All the best

Ade

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Posted : 20th January 2010 3:35 pm
scotsboy
(@scotsboy)

Hi Captain,

Totally get you on hoping a result goes the opposite of what you would bet when you dont have a coupon on. When I managed to stay bet free for about a month a while back thats what I sat and did every Saturday night. It would be like, brilliant, Man Utd drew, I would have had that on for them to win, and I even like Man Utd as a team too! But I would be happy they didnt win so that would make me feel I didnt lose money! Ridiculous!

Keep at it mate, hope to see you in chat sometime soon.

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Posted : 20th January 2010 4:01 pm
captain46
(@captain46)

Day 4 - wake up, note my thoughts - first thought is 'I'm not allowed to gamble anymore.' This makes me sad. I've failed. I should be able to gamble in control. But I cant so I need to heed the advice.

It's Wednesday. I always get a weekend coupon on a Wednesday. I cant today. How I am gonna cope with Saturday?? Havent missed a Saturday bet for 20 odd years unless its been Christmas Eve / Christmas Day.

The chat is helping. I remember there is no chat on a Wednesday. I wonder why that is... am I leaning too heavily on the chat?

Another boring lunchtime today, another fast drive home, deja vu.

Appreciate those in chat and those reading diary and commenting, cheers folks.

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Posted : 20th January 2010 6:04 pm
Jasmine
(@jasmine)

Hi Captain,

I really understand your last post. Deciding to stop a behaviour which has lasted over 20 years is going to take some work. It can be done, if that's what you really want to do. In my early days it was absolutely terrible Captain...a different sort of gambling but gambling all the same. I used to gamble online and would get really excited at the thought of sitting down to log on...as if it was some sort of reward for all the hard work I had been doing during the day. It takes time to get used to behaving in a different way. Give yourself time, day by day it will get better for you.

Don't worry about using chat too much...what is too much anyway when it clearly helps. Why don't you nip onto netline and have a chat with an advisor if you need to. I can recommend the counselling which Gamcare provide too.

You are doing great...keep posting.

Jas x

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Posted : 20th January 2010 6:17 pm
captain46
(@captain46)

Day 5 - stressful - travelled on train with 4 work colleagues - they have conversation, I just listen and say Yes and No and smile. I can only talk about gambling, sport and work, nothing else.

I appreciate others responding to my diary but feel a bit guilty about not posting on theirs, but what can I add, I am still too new to this. I cant congratulate someone on abstaining from gambling, I dont have the determination not to gamble that others seem to have.

I just feel I have been given a life sentence not to gamble as punishment for gambling away all my money for years.

Still concerned what I will do on Saturday. Others work hard all week and look forward to weekend. Without gambling I work hard and have nothing to look forward to.

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Posted : 21st January 2010 8:07 pm
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