I'm out of control, i can't remember how many 100's bets I've put on over 1.5s in the last few weeks. Win win looooooose so bad. I'm drinking when I'm gambling I'm putting on weight it's really frying me. I'm hoping but putting it down I'll try and make an effort to stop.
All cards are cut up, no online, no gambling through mates. s**t I hate this ffs
Let's just try and be honest on here to start. Day 1 tomorrow, I've been here around 10 years ago why am I still doing it
Hi
For me the unhealhy Gambling addictions and obsessions only indicated how emotionally vulnerable I was.
When I turned to my addictions and obsessions it was often fear based issues.
I went to the recovery program for some one else, I did not do it for myself.
How ever much pain I had suffered in my life, by Gambling I was making things much worse and more painful.
In my recovery I got to understand my emotional triggers, pains I could not heal, fears I could not face, frustrations due to my unreasonable expectations of people life and situations, loneliness, and boredom.
I got to understand my anger was an unhealthy reaction to pains I could not heal, fears I could not face, frustrations due to my unreasonable expectations of people life and situations.
Where do you start to peel back the onion and expose the hurt inner child in you?
Being honest to myself was a very big part of my recovery.
It took me over 20 years to get wise at to what recovery is really about.
Yet that 20 years to get the light bulb moment was very important to me and becoming healthy and whole.
How long to admit to myself that I was a hurt child that never healed or matured.
Love and peace to every one
Dave L
AKA Dave of Beckenham UK
Lock down started me gambling and drinking may I add terribly. Boredom mostly. I've gone from weeks up xxx to losing all the next week. It can start from waiting for the bookie to open their safe and losing 50nquid to giving over a grand back I'm clearly out of control. What I don't get is why I keep going back to do it. I think its because I've won and lost a lot in minutes. If I'm honest I'm tired of it now it's exhausting and just a merry go round.
2 months ago I was drunk and had a text from an online casino I'm signed up to gamcare to my amazement I could sign up. I was up all night resulting in me winning xxx playing slots. I withdraw thinking I'm happy problems solved. The next morning I check the reviews on four crowns casino o*g they will not pay out and I do not expect it. They are based in curacao I'm not sure if anybody has had similar experience but please do not do it. They've now blocked my account.
Anyway here I am at my wits end, this is it with gambling I need to make a change. Anybody feel free to comment good or bad. I have no cards no access to money I'm sure I can recover but need to get through the next month
Hi Cross,
Sorry to say you are a mess. What came first ? the drinking or the gambling. I racked up 20k of gambling debts. The gambling came first, then as I plucked up the courage through alcohol & I took out another loan/credit card trying to convince myself this time would be different.
The THIS TIME NEVER CAME. I racked up more debt whilst everyone around me suffered & all I was doing was more damage to myself. All I know is gambling addiction is more powerful than me. Hand over finances to someone else. Provide receipts for every penny spent. Like any addiction there are withdrawal symptoms, there's no methadone to ease the pain only cold turkey & getting through it is tough.
There's more shame in keeping it to yourself than telling someone close that you're powerless over this addiction. Gamblers & money have a toxic relationship. Opening up can be liberating & is often the first step in setting you free from the addictions clutches. Number one priority phone the helpline on here, available 24/7 & reach out for help. Take all advice on how to self exclude & consider counselling.
If you're serious about stopping this isn't going to be a short journey nor an easy one. However it is going to be a worthwhile one. Are you ready for it ?.
Best Wishes
AL
Hello @crossintheroad
I am pleased that you have found the Forum and have taken the first step in Recovery by reaching out for help and support. Problem gambling is cunning, powerful and baffling and without help it is too much.
We have Advisers available 24/7 to help you through this. You can contact an Advisers by calling our HelpLine on 0800 8020 133 or by using our LiveChat option. I encourage you to make contact so that we can advice you of the best way forward.
In the meantime, please continue to use the Forum. It is very powerful to connect with others in Recovery sharing their experience, strength and hope. Please know that you are no longer alone.
Best
Amanda
Forum Admin
Hi
I started gambling and drinking from a very early.
In the pubs I would put on a front to hide the real me.
I am not a terrible person was just a very unhealthy person with certin emotional triggers.
Boredom was one of my unhealthy triggers.
For me when I won I just prolonged the my sufferings my pains and the fears I was causing myself.
It is very healthy to be tired of unhealthy habits.
It took me over 32 years to take recovery program seriously, after being in the recovery program over 20 years I go the light bulb moment.
Gambling was not my problem, I was the problem.
It is very exhausting self destructing your self day after day.
Handing over my finances was very difficult for me as I saw it as a control issue.
Giving up the gamblingcan lead you to a very healthy life, if you want really want it.
In time you will respect your self and respect your money.
Love and peace to every one
Dave L
AKA Dave of Beckenham
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