Day one.

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(@makoaddict)
Posts: 14
Topic starter
 

So today is day one gambling free. I've done so many bad things. I've burnt so many bridges. I don't have more to say today - I just know it's important to start this now and keep at it. Maybe i'll open up more soon. No more gambling.

 
Posted : 17th December 2020 11:01 am
(@charlieboy)
Posts: 1013
 

Hi mako, we are all here when you want to talk, no judgement. Good to get things off your chest will help you with your recovery

 
Posted : 17th December 2020 4:18 pm
(@makoaddict)
Posts: 14
Topic starter
 

Here we are on day two!

I'm mixed between that feeling of wanting to chase losses and feeling sick to my stomach with the thought of ever gambling again. (I have put the necessary blocks and precautions in place to prevent me from chasing losses and have given up financial control - don't worry).

One day at a time guys. Thank you for your kind words 

 

 
Posted : 18th December 2020 10:03 am
(@makoaddict)
Posts: 14
Topic starter
 

Day 3 - should have posted this yesterday but was very busy. Didnt really think about gambling at all. 

Day 4 - keep seeing adverts on TV and Facebook that really do get in my head. Oh well, bored today but not thinking of trying to find any ways to gamble.

 
Posted : 20th December 2020 4:54 pm
(@makoaddict)
Posts: 14
Topic starter
 

Day 5 - Still going strong. I'd like to say gambling is in the past but i've said that too many times over the years. It's early days. Christmas soon!

 
Posted : 21st December 2020 9:55 am
(@makoaddict)
Posts: 14
Topic starter
 

Day 6 - was slightly triggered yesterday by something I saw (an image which related to online slots bought feelings and desires flooding in) but I dismissed it as quick as I could. It's still difficult, and I still feel a lot of guilt and shame but my partner has been so supportive, and for her sake I can never make this mistake again. 

 
Posted : 22nd December 2020 11:00 am
(@makoaddict)
Posts: 14
Topic starter
 

Day 7 - not much to say today. Same old. Not thought about gambling, feeling good.

 
Posted : 23rd December 2020 4:05 pm
(@makoaddict)
Posts: 14
Topic starter
 

Day 8. First week conquered and christmas eve. Looking forward to the day I can say it's been a month/year etc but one day at a time 🙂

 
Posted : 24th December 2020 11:31 am
(@makoaddict)
Posts: 14
Topic starter
 

Day 9 - Christmas! Had a gambling dream last night which was a first in a while. But a dream is a dream. Its not real and won't be!

 

Merry Christmas.

 
Posted : 25th December 2020 12:40 pm
Si_mon
(@si_mon)
Posts: 136
 

Brilliant, well done. Merry Christmas.

 
Posted : 25th December 2020 3:19 pm
(@hannah13)
Posts: 26
 

Congratulations! I find the dreams tricky, they are getting more rare for me now but it does strike up feelings. Especially if I win in the dream, I had a dream this week that two people I went to university with who I haven’t seen or spoke to in 4 years got engaged. Two days later saw on social media that they did the day after my dream. I know I’m not psychic - but it does make those dreams a challenge! On the other hand - dreams where I gamble and lose, wake up feeling lost and sad and then relived that it was a dream can make me so glad I have hopefully given up for good. I am only on day 54 but this time feels better than it has done before.

Best of luck to you x

 
Posted : 26th December 2020 1:10 am
(@makoaddict)
Posts: 14
Topic starter
 

Thanks for the support guys it means a lot. I don't usually lose in my dreams but I guess that's why they're dreams lol.

Day 10&11. Honestly money is evil. I wish a world without it existed. That's just a side note away from gambling. I haven't felt the need but I must say I used to follow a few people on YouTube and watched their videos religiously and I miss that. I can't help but wonder if I went back to watching them if it would be okay but right now I'm going to say probably not.

 
Posted : 27th December 2020 3:51 pm
(@makoaddict)
Posts: 14
Topic starter
 

27th - today

 

I've been absent over xmas period as quite frankly haven't thought about gambling much at all.

 
Posted : 4th January 2021 1:39 pm
(@makoaddict)
Posts: 14
Topic starter
 

05/01 Another day, too busy with other life things to think about it. Bloody lockdown, hope this is over soon.

 
Posted : 5th January 2021 1:52 pm
(@makoaddict)
Posts: 14
Topic starter
 

Day 22 -good progress. Been GF since day one and coming up on a month. All good here.

 
Posted : 8th January 2021 10:04 am
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