A returning member

A few days in now. 

I’m gamstopped. 1 big roadblock there is that I’ve had a European betting account still open despite my pleas to them to close the account down so I’m having to block the website on my mobile browser. It still has moneyed it  from the other day but I will not go back there..

Getting used to not having the access to credit there which will cut unnecessary spending out. 

I am seeking to check in at least once a week & pop on the chat room as well

have a good weekend all. 

Wishing you all the best in your journey towards a better future with your partner and family. It's hardest at the beginning as you may well know but keep thinking about the bigger picture and your ultimate goal.

Hi there thanks for replying to me. 

I’ll look out for your post when I can. 

I haven’t gambled since my last bet. I’ve felt less preoccupied with gambling which is good. 

however though I had a scary moment on Wednesday when I’d had a drink, I knew I had £47 left on a European betting account I had used. I went to go on it & that money wasn’t there. I had just put the blocks in place in the form of gambling freezes on my current account, those websites blocked on my phone. 

so I will get those blocked on my other devices my laptop & my fire tablet. 

believe u & me if I would have had any means there that night to cause absolute carnage all over again I would have done that like an absolute crazed maniac & deep down I am much better than that. 

I am due to start my DMP with stepchange next month to begin repaying the debt i accrued. 

1 saving grace is that I can get overtime at work when I want it so I’m starting to get some in to get some funds built up. Ino the mrs doesn’t like me doing it that much but like I’ve just said to her we are going to need the money. Coz I want to start putting away for holidays & our wedding. With that though a clear plan of action is gonna be needed going forward. 

have a good weekend everybody & stay safe. 

Rob

How is it going Rob? I'm hoping things are still good with you. I found that however determined I was to stop giving my much needed money to the bookies that I was a little more susceptible to doing it once I had had a drink or two.

It kind of softened my inhibitions but also it softened my resolve. In the end I stopped drinking for the first few months as I wasn't sure if I trusted myself not to gamble when having had some alcohol. Now I have gone 100+ days from having a bet I feel more comfortable in having the odd beer with my dinner every few days. At the start though it's hard because you are never quite sure if you can trust yourself or not. 

I hope things are going well for you anyway. Have a good weekend. 

Hey Rob.

Great that despite a set back (we’re all human) you’re back on here locking to stay gamble free.

Good luck and one day at a time.

Look forward to reading about your recovery.

Thanks for the replies u 2. I will try & post on your threads soon. 

I have not had 1 single bet since my last one :D. 

This week I’ve put additional safeguards in place in the form of ISP web settings to block all gambling access. 

1 of my mates sent me a pic of his bet slip of this weekends footie, I told him I don’t do sports betting anymore due to the fact that u have to put your time & effort into  it & it can easily become a distraction (none of my friends know about my recent Blackjack relapse on the morning of the 10th of September & I don’t want them to know, the only people who do know are my mrs, my mother in law, my mother, her partner, my older brother & a lad at work who likes a bet & we discussed gambling on a regular basis, I explained why I don’t bet anymore, he told me a story about how he knew somebody who was an online moderator for casino games & how often they said the win loss ratio is & is basically a reason why he doesn’t touch online casino games & I wish to keep it at that.

Anither friend of mine suggested going to the races, mind u this was before I had that almighty relapse, what I need to be saying to him is that I don’t really fancy going to the races I can just say I’m not really a fan of it as such, I can come up with some bull that would get me out of that. The mrs & my mother in law have tried to dissuade me from now going to anything like that which is understandable. Coz if I even have 1 & I mean 1 flutter on anything. My minds gonna be craving more betting further down the line & I’m going to end up heading straight back into the cycle I’m trying to stay away from. I’m also a video game player always have been, some u do get gambling games like poker, slots, blackjack etc on some games. I need to realise there for fun. 

Tbh Mythdunk I went & got a few beers last Wednesday, the mrs was doing screamers at me coz she was convinced it was gonna lead onto me gambling. To be fair though like I put in my last post i could have done but the resources were not there for me to do anything serious with thank goodness. Straight away I had to stand up & take notice of that 1. 

It’s just the blocking of the European gambling websites I need to do on my laptop & tablet when I get chance & as much as I am motivated no Avenue can be left open whatsoever. 

this week I’ve made savings accounts for an emergency fund, a christening fund for our little girl (which will become a wedding fund when the christenings been & gone) and a holiday fund. Ino there’s a lot to save up for & do this next 12 months but if I don’t stay on form it’s all not gonna happen, like I said to my mum when she asked me how I was getting on with it all I can’t afford to put my mrs through any more hurt because of it all, looking back I’ve hurt her plenty of times through my gambling actions, as sporadic as they were. Each & every one of them hurt her badly & now I’ve got to say to myself if it all happens again I’m afraid to say she deserves better, and much better as well. 

hope yas have a good week I’ll be posting on this on a weekly basis. 

Rob

I’ve not found a great deal of time to post as of late so I thought I better make a new post now. 

The big news is I haven’t gambled, not at all & in myself I feel miles better for the madness of gambling not being there in my everyday life. Getting through each day as it comes but I feel more free & able to focus on what’s important in life & other things & that’s how it should be. 

It hasn’t been without its urges however, I dropped my phone whilst out the other day & it’s gonna cost me £15 to replace the screen looking at it, now that’s something that would have made me gamble, the only option I’m left with is the local bookies but it’s knowing not under any circumstance am I to gamble, not 1 bet due to the psychological impact it has on me. From there everything else falls into place. 

I will make a thing to post more I know I keep on saying it. 

Rob 

well done on ur progress

Thank you & apologies for getting back so late. 

As ever I should be posting more but haven’t. 

Tbh a bit ago I was a bit brash I felt with a reply on a family & friends post which made me worried about posting again for a bit as well. I’ll send that person my apologies. 

Ive still not bet anything very much by the skin of my teeth at times. The subconscious of mine hasn’t stretched as far as going to place a bet on anything. 

What’s new really is that (in parts at the moment mind u) I’m getting into tech fixing buying faulty laptops, games consoles, mobiles of eBay fixing them & then selling at a profit. To be fair I haven’t successfully fixed anything yet I’m still learning what I can on that side of things. 

the bigger picture to look at is that my family won’t have the things they need and want if I were to go back down the road of gambling excessively. 

I also am gonna be having a stop smoking/vaping attempt soon. For rhat I’ll be giving the mrs my e-cig and tell her to put it somewhere where i won’t be able to find it. Gonna have to make sure I prepare for what will be coming then with the habit changes etc: 

Thats all for now. 

my names Rob & I am a compulsive gambler, the last time I placed a bet was 11th September last year. 

I’ve not been here for a while again & I’m posting now whilst I can. 

Despite some temptations I’ve managed to stay away from gambling thankfully. 

I know if I get sucked back into it it’ll take from me eventually & I will lose more than money & time; next time it’ll be more important things like my family for example. 

My name is Rob & I’ve not placed a bet since 11/9/20

Three words - well done Rob! 

Hi

Welcome back to recovery we are pleased you have decided to stay connected.

I have lost count of the number of times I went back to the unhealthy habit.

I eventually went to meetings for mself, that made a big difference to my motivation.

As far as I am concerned I am pleased any person come back to the recovery program.

I could say that my intentions sticking with the recovery was selfish, I wanted to give up  self destructing myself.

For me the recovery program is abaout a healing of my pains process.

Please stick with it.

Recovery is a life saver in so many ways.

Love and peace to every one

Dave L

AKA Dave of Beckenham UK

@gadaveuk that’s the thing, going back to it will do absolutely no favours, like somebody said at GA when I went in the past (I don’t attend meetings now) gambling is a selfish addiction & u have to be selfish to get out of it. Very true. 

I just couldn’t go back to living that life again the one I have now I would not trade for anything. 

Thanks again guys. 

@rob_evans88 

HI the recovery program is about moving forward from our past to no longer live in the pains of our past.

It is very healthy living a pain and fear filled life today.

Love and peace to every one

Dave L

AKA Dave of Beckenham