I Will not Gamble Today
Hi I am back again of course after falling off the wagon I have been up and down all year, I really can't trust myself like never before well I am starting today. Alot has to change within me and around me. I suppose I have failed so many time I cannot look with optimism to this been the start of the rest of my life. Lets call it a day so Saturday 16th of December I will not gamble and thats all I can hope for. I am off to bed now my head is melted. I am f*****g sick of this.
Frozen.
There's a valued saying 'nothing changes if nothing changes'
What are you going to do today that creates change.
Self exclude,relinquish your financial control over to another, speak to your bank, find a GA room,phone gamcare and ask what they can do to help.
Be honest with yourself, I had no control over addiction,it ruled my every thought, I lived eventually to solely feed it. It wants to control your every thought and it will take all you have to give and some,all on some false promise that today will be different.
We all live by the same mantra.
I CANNOT WIN BECAUSE I CANNOT STOP.
Create change,embrace change and offer yourself the opportunity for a better life, that begins with a choice.
I believe that we actually win every day we don't wage a single penny on the outcome of something beyond our control.
I hope for you and yours that todays the day you create those changes.
Abstain and maintain
Duncs stepping forward never back.
At one point in my life Duncan I would have quaffed at what you said but I am now finding myself nodding in agreement. I so want to have a bet today, I know it's self destructive but thats how I feel. It's so stupid wanting to return to what is putting you in this misreable place. I am plotting and planning to gamble in some part of my head even as I write this to you. Christ it's so hypocritical telling you all on here I don't want to gamble anymore yet so badly wanting to return. Just reading Duncan's comment has calmed me somewhat so much for wanting to stop gambling simply not enough this is so ingrained.
Just for today I will not gamble
Just for today I will accept that i cannot gamble
Well my urge has fallen away, I went to the GYM sweated out the badness, it's a small step but so far today I have not had a bet and that is an improvement on yesterday. I have just got to accept that I am not in control once I gamble
I suppose Day 1 completed at this stage, I feel so much better than yesterday. This disease has me mentally destroyed even before the financial. Happy with Day 1 I have posted 3 times today because I needed to I was gone gambling in my head at 12 today between a phone call and this site I managed to get through it I am thankful for that roll on tomorrow.
Day 2
Just for today I will not gamble
Just for today I will accept I cannot gamble
I will not carry money, I will not have access to money
Just for today I will enjoy being gamble free
good luck everybody
Good luck Frozen. I’m 1 day behind you on this, and countless times around the block. Let’s make it through Christmas and New year and agree to make 2018 and gamble free year.
Thanks Michael, I am Michael too BTW.
Just for today I will not gamble
Just for today I will accept I cannot gamble
Just for today I will not have access to money
Just for today I will enjoy been gamble free.
A day completed not so bad happy out.
Day 3
Just for today I will not gamble
Just for today I will not carry or have access to money
Just for today I will accept I cannot gamble
Just for today I will enjoy been gamble free.
Some people may ask why I am writing the first couple of lines, because I think I need to constantly remind myself that I am a compulsive gambler and that for me there are many dangerous situations while not gambling will be the first steps on the road to gambling. So my first two days have been easy enough I have had urges but I managed to get through them. I would like to think into the future but unfortunately that at this moment is not worthwhile or possible. I need to do this minute by minute not dropping my guard and change. I suppose change is going to be the most difficult part the whole gambling world is who I am and how I react. I need gambling to be happy, sad, stressed anxious even mindful and calm. It has managed to wriggle its way into been a part of every emotion I have. I don't expect miracles, but I am going to give this a good go and make it happen. The self doubt as I write this caused by previous failures is a big problem so I can and I will get through today gamble free.
Hi Frozen
I just stopped today. After losing all what's in my bank account (1,000) last night in one single bet on a sports game. I've lost over 6/7 thousand since June. And constantly just chasing and chasing I don't know how to stop honestly.
I have got 540 going into my bank account tonight after midnight and I'm already thinking about chasing and putting 500 on the late 3:35 am NBA game. Getting 900 back and withdrawing it to buy Christmas presents. Now I just automatically think I can win it tonight and withdraw it and money will be here on thursday ( if I win) you see I'm already talking about it and it's the after noon. I was suppose to by myself an Xbox and lots of Christmas presents for my children . Now if I do bet this tonight and if I lose....then I'll have no money and no Christmas presents for anyone.
I don't know what to do. I really want to bet and chase but then again I don't want to....it's f*****g my head up big time. I want to stop before it's too late. I'm thinking it will only take me 6/7 months to recoup what I've lost this whole year so not until May/June 2018 would I have it all back....
I don't know what do u think I should do??? I'm so annoyed at myself I can't stop thinking about it ..... So stupid I would've had 1,540 in my bank tomorrow . Now I'll only have 540. It's detrimental to my mental health and physical as it stops me from eating and just constantly basing my day / routine around gambling and not leaving the house because of it.
I only get about 1200/1300 a month ( not as much as u guys ) so I really do be struggling when I lose 100s and 1000s.....
Any advice would be good... Preferably before midnight tonight as that's when money goes into my bank.
I rally just want to go over to the ATM at midnight when it goes in and withdraw it all so I can not possibly bet tonight.
I'm in two minds.
Thanks guys ,
Enjoy your day
Just for Today I will not gamble, Just for today I will accept I cannot gamble, just for today I will not carry money, just for today I will enjoy life. Slow down take it easy one day at a time.
Day 4 begins first 3 have been good I will update later today.
Buy Xmas presents is my idea, its a must
​
Another day done, its good to be on the straight and narrow all you can do is hope for another good day
Just for today I will not gamble
Just for today I will accept I cannot gamble
just for toady I will not carry money
Just for today I will be patient
Just for today I will enjoy being gamble free
Day 5
You would think I was torturing myself the way I am going on, as if I was giving up some delightful pastime. Nothing could be further from the truth, I am calm, enjoying my families company & life has been good these past 5 days. I have no great expectations I have been down this road many times and messed up. So I am just going to take it on a day by day basis there is no point in having long term goals when getting 1 day is an acheivement. So far my recovery has been good and time has flown by long may this continue and for now I will take it. I have not bothered to look deeper into my recovery or try understand it as what real point has this? Wishing everyone struggling and otherwise a merry Xmas and hopefully a better New Year
Day 5 Complete yay
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