Support us

Want to take the cowards way out  

 
sha123
(@sha123)

I have just lost a huge amount of money paypal again got no money in bank, i knew i could not cover yet i kept going and going, My depression and anxiety is so bad all i can think of is ending my life i'm sat here staring at a handful of pills my pills crying and crying . I'm in my 40s 4 kids  one in his  20's and just been told not long ago my nearly 4 year old has autism he never sleeps and is very hard work but such a sweet boy.  I feel i let all my family down i feel sick and right now all i want is this pain to go.

Quote
Posted : 20th August 2019 12:15 am
Brummyboy
(@brummyboy)

Hi mate, 

We have all had those thoughts and how we believe life would be better if we were just not here but that couldn’t be further from the truth. It’s who we leave behind that suffer the most. I wrote suicide notes and was very close to going through with it but I just couldn’t. I’m so glad I didn’t. I got myself to a GA meeting and haven’t looked back since. I never thought it could be possible but I have got to this point and will keep going.

Its never too late to sort the mess out we have created. 

 

Hope your okay. 

Dan 

ReplyQuote
Posted : 20th August 2019 1:06 am
sha123
(@sha123)

Thank you😞

  lost even more chasing, tried gamban again but not enough info i want to put blocks on now.

I don't even have the money in my bank, its ridiculous that these gambling sites uses paypal  I deposited really ridiculous amounts out of sheer panic trying all night to win money back but all i done is ended up even worse so very depressed.

I know you should not chase, it has really got a hold on me, I really do not know what to do I owe paypal so much its making me sick looking at them transactions. My family has had enough of me they say its excuses when i tell them i do it to stop thinking and that little bit of excitement when i win only to give it back, they seem to think i can stop just like that, i am in so much debt i have a dmp but keep borrowing of family only to throw it back in their faces by gambling what they lent me. I was so close to just ending it but cant as i have young children otherwise i really think i would not just because the gambling but this horrible depression i'm already on medication two different pills, quetiapine which makes you feel like a zombie. I need to see the doctor but cant go out the door, i find it very hard I'm very overweight which is adding to my problems i buy things i don't need i have that tiny bit of excitement opening my parcel then its gone and i'm left with stuff i don't need. Even if i did see my doctor I'm too scared to say anything as they will think i am unfit, but something needs to change i'm ready this time to do all i can just wish i can put blocks on now. I would close all my accounts but i have so many the ones i use i have stopped, but scared i will open another as cant stop thinking about the losses, i know it's gone but it is that awful urge to win it back. I have been in this situation for years, but just lately i been gambling more and more and the stakes are going up even more.

ReplyQuote
Posted : 20th August 2019 8:27 am
bdog
 bdog
(@bdog)

Hi @sha123

There are a lot of us here who know exactly how you are feeling. You may think you're alone and there is no way back, but there are many here who have started to come out the other side.  For now, I need you to trust me and do the following:

1. Get blocks in place.  Make sure there is no way around these blocks.  You will try and get round them in these low times.  Don't allow yourself to.  Any gratification/win will get swallowed up with a loss = you spiral further.  get blocks in place.  

2. Have a read around the forum (read my posts if you like), give the experts a call, join the chat (1pm and 8pm i think?)

3. Don't do anything silly. It's a long road, but it starts now and it's one day at a time. 

If you need to talk, we are here.  keep posting.  

ReplyQuote
Posted : 20th August 2019 10:41 am
sha123
(@sha123)

Thank you so much it means a lot, what blocks can i use until i sort gamban out as  i need to call them 

Thanks Again 

ReplyQuote
Posted : 20th August 2019 11:34 am
Forum admin
(@forum-admin)
Admin
Posted by: sha123

Thank you so much it means a lot, what blocks can i use until i sort gamban out as  i need to call them 

Thanks Again 

Dear sha123,

Thank you for your posts, I am sorry to hear that you are struggling; it sounds like you have a lot of challenging situations at home and in your family life.

You can register with Gam Stop www.gamstop.co.uk which is the National Self-Exclusion scheme for online gambling. Gam Stop will stop you from playing from any existing accounts and also from opening any new accounts.

For further advice and support including information on blocks to accessing gambling sites and signposting to debt advice/management and referral to treatment support please contact the helpline on 0808 8020 133 or via our netline available very day from 8.00am until midnight where you can speak to an adviser.

Wishing you all the very best,

Forum Admin

ReplyQuote
Posted : 20th August 2019 12:19 pm
TraceyJ
(@traceyj)

Hi sha,

ive just relapsed again, lucky enough paid some bills but feel the usual c**P after what I've just done. I'm registered with gamstop but use my son's account (CG's do anything for a quick spin that costs 100's)

Ive just downloaded gamban on my phone, they're doing 14 days free trial, it literally took me one minute and now it's all in place. No more temptation for at least 2 weeks. This gives me a bit of breathing space. I think the annual fee is 24.99 which has so got to be worth it in the long run (I can spend that in less than 5 minutes on slots)

Wishing you the best of luck, stay strong

Xx

 

ReplyQuote
Posted : 20th August 2019 3:43 pm
sha123
(@sha123)

Thank you Admin

 

Hi, Tracey thank you so much for your reply sorry to hear you have relapsed as well ☹ such a horrible feeling  spinning  them awful slots depositing 100 after 100s waiting for a bonus that pays pennies, it don't help when the gambling sites offer bonuses. 

I will check that out thank you worth it in a long run, I think i start a diary maybe that will help 

I Just feel so gutted 😞 xx

ReplyQuote
Posted : 20th August 2019 4:19 pm
TraceyJ
(@traceyj)

I know Sha, the feeling is awful. We can't keep doing this to ourselves, that's why the final block is in place. 

We can do this xx

ReplyQuote
Posted : 20th August 2019 6:26 pm
klamm
(@klamm)

try to sell the stuff you don`t need 

 

put in on gumtree or smth 

 

 

ReplyQuote
Posted : 20th August 2019 8:42 pm
Forum admin
(@forum-admin)
Admin

Hi @sha123 and @tracyj

Just to let you know that if you contact our free HelpLine on 0808 8020 1333 or the Live Chat, you can ask one of our advisers to email you a link for a free promotional code to get Gamban on up to 3 devices, free for one year. 

Kind regards

Leigh 

Forum Admin 

 

 

ReplyQuote
Posted : 20th August 2019 9:53 pm
TraceyJ
(@traceyj)

Thanks Leigh 😄

ReplyQuote
Posted : 21st August 2019 5:08 am
sha123
(@sha123)

Thank you Leigh

My item don't really do well on gumtree, and shpock people put silly offers in or don't turn up, so i use ebay but found out i can use my partners paypal as i need to shut my paypal down blocks are good but i always find away around them unfortunately  

 

Hi Tracey,

Thank you how are you doing? i got strong urges just pacing round the house to distract myself. Do you get them? i used to play demo slots but that was a very bad idea as it just made the urges worse. My paypal payments still not come out am dreading it.

Hope your well xx

ReplyQuote
Posted : 21st August 2019 7:41 pm
Kaykay
(@kaykay)

Hi Sha. 

So sorry to read about your story, have you managed to sort out PayPal yet? I too myself have done this and it’s utterly terrifying. 

ReplyQuote
Posted : 2nd September 2019 12:38 pm
Share this page
Share
  
Working

Please Login or Register