The familiar slots story

yes, it’s amazing how many sneaky slots you can fit in during the day. Just nip for a brew and fire it up and double click on the spin button to speed things up (so you don’t even see them spin properly any more!). Just nip to the loo and sit there spinning - not even using the loo!)....... so many opportunities - so you may feel pathetic but it’s so common I reckon. You ever thought of speaking to your partner about it all and how you feel?

I’m speaking as if I’m all sorted. I’m not. I’ve done the Gamstop but the thoughts are still there (fantasising about the big slot wins I’ve had and maybe if I’d just carried on a bit more I would have got another and then stopped). Then there are the implications on those closest to me - their anxiety that I may do it again; which leads to more anxiety for me. But by speaking to those closest to me (and speaking to an expert - and putting the gambling stops in place - and using this site - and speaking about it some more!) I hope to get over this addiction (which is what it is). It’s not easy and very up and down emotionally.

cheers 

Yes Macca you are right. I'm also speaking as if it is all sorted, but the past shows that I've thought that before. Possibly easier to take things one day (or one hour!) at a time, as it is easy to lapse. 

I've spoken to my partner about practically all of it. She thinks there is an element of self-destruction which i agree with (probably easier to spot when you are watching someone slot for hours on end and they are getting more and more agitated).

all the best!

Self destruction! Yes! My wife said the same! She said I’ve always had a streak like that..... this time Ive been doing it gambling......

another of many reasons for this addiction. i have health problems and often its a case of "well im feeling miserable anyway so i might as well have something else to be miserable about." How many reasons are there for doing this?

- self-destruction

- poor physical health

-anxiety

- depression

-boredom

- financial problems

- escapism 

I’m sorry to hear you have health problems and understand your compulsion to gamble because of this. But unfortunately it adds to the problem. What kicked it off for me again at the start of this year was a number of things I think - including a minor health issue that restricted me from doing my normal routine. Not using that as an excuse, but it was one of a few things that could have influenced me.

take care

Cheers, Macca! It seems people have various different triggers and these are the moments when you can be dragged back in.

I had some CBT treatment a year ago and one useful task was to list the pros and cons of doing a particular thing. As mentioned earlier, there is a long list of cons and barely any pros of slotting, so when I do lapse it feels like a weakness or a weak moment or a loss of control. Sometimes the urge is so strong that logic goes out of the window. Could be an emotional reaction rather than thinking things through properly. 

How are you, 1975er?

Hi Macca, not bad thanks! How are things with you?

I had a 'moment' a few weeks ago. It was a Friday evening, usually time to relax, but I started slotting just before we ate, then rushed through the meal and I was back slotting again. My partner was really P*ssed off (and she's put up with a lot), so that was a reality check and following that 'my' slot was surprisingly removed from the market thanks to the ukgc, so at the moment I'm staying away from them. I know if I played various games I would soon find another favourite, so I'm trying my best to keep away completely. 

Hi i joined a couple of days ago after finally admitting i had a problem !!.

I mentioned in my original introduction , that i have never gambled online , but if i was in that situation . the first thing i would do if you want to stop all the contact and freebies , is change your mobile number , and also your email address . obviously send the new details out to people . i have done both within the last few years , and i do not get any hassle off anybody atm . give that a try . then the need for game banning sites becomes redundant . 

give it a try . ps its amazing to thing now i have wiped out my funds and i can't gamble how clear my thinking is .

Hi the only way is up,

Thank you for sharing that on our forum. You sound very positive.  

Best Wishes

Forum Admin

Hi, yer I’m ok thanks. Not gambled at all  for about a month. It’s a strange state of mind. The buzz of gambling seems so real but instead the act is just an elevated state of mind to get you to feel normal. Looking back; a big win (and I really did get the big ones I sought after, and you see in the flipping internet - but I’ve lost more!!) feels like a big buzz (but I think the big buzz is actually a feeling of massive relief that you have regained losses; I now know it was just relief)

id love to be able to enjoy gambling; because I think I enjoy it. But I can’t gamble. Because it’s awful and I don’t enjoy it, really. I just think I do. Nightmare! ?.

sorry for rambling on. I’m still going too and forth with this in my own mind, let alone yours.

I hope things get better for you. I’m battling hard to change my frame of mind to someone who doesn’t feel the need to gamble and can see sense that there is nothing to be gained apart for the very, very few (Like a lottery winner - but even then I Think winning the lottery would probably ruin a life ?.......why oh why do we bother!

there is so much to be lost by gambling as we all know. And even if we did win big, I’m not sure that would help either. Either we win big and then waste huge amounts of time spending it again; or we win stupid amounts and it would change everything and ruin things on a whole different level.

anyway,

take care. Cutting them off at the pass is definitely the best first step (for me) as I’ve mentioned before. Gamstop ?

Posted by: Forum admin

Hi the only way is up,

Thank you for sharing that on our forum. You sound very positive.  

Best Wishes

Forum Admin

Thank you for your response 

 Yes i am very positive .

I am still using anger to stifle my urges .[ YOU f@@@@** DARE GAMBLE ]  i have told my local club  [ and members ] a white lie ,as to why i won't be playing there 10p a go bandit again .

 The only pub in my town i gamble in,  i will avoid . One of the THREE bookies in my small town has closed .BTW  i am not self excluding , that is my personal choice which works best for me , i will just simply avoid them ALL  .and I'm buying things again like food [ I'm not joking ] as in an online weekly shop .

My cash card is hidden away,  i have photographed it on my camera in case i need to pay for something . and i have in my phone wallet just  £20 . for taxis and my local club for a pint or two .[ which i replenish when required ]  In the last 13 days i have cleared my mortgage arrears £1200 . [ which would have all gone gambling btw ] . as it was about to go to the litigation dept ...... i was close to being seriously in the s*** . 

 I'm self employed thats not a weekly wage btw !!!  that was with a few payments coming in , Next week i will pay off £500 to clear my Gas and Electric arrears [  i spent the gas ,and electric money  to clear my arrears  gambling that LAST GAMBLING  Sunday 13th Oct , when i lost £510 . in two hours .  The Next weeks paying the tax 1K [ then my accountants ] that is the plan , clear my debts . the Credit card arrears £16 grand are £ 30 per month . eventually i will try and save a lump sum and contact them [ i will need help and advice for that , any would be appreciated . 

oh and i need double glazing [ my house is bloo*y freezing . 

So i am positive , because i feel liberated , None of the above i could even entertain if i was ploughing money into machines . 

For the first time since 2002 i actually feel I'm  living again . just need to stop the binge drinking now , but thats for another day . 

Hi the only way is up! How are things?

I think you are right about ceasing all contact. For me that is essential. What I've noticed is that will power can only get me so far. There is always the feeling that a relapse is around the corner. Anyone who has been involved in gambling for years is going to find GAM stop a tough step to take, but I feel it is the only real option for me. It is a big step, but without doing it I will always relapse in a week/month/year. 

Hope you are keeping well too, Macca!

Hi 1975er.

Im ok thanks. 6 weeks (or so) gamble free.

wont lie - I’ve just had to distract myself tonight as I would absolutely love a gamble (well, I think I’d love it - we know it doesn’t end up that way).

but - I can’t! I’m blocked. I’m afraid it’s the only way, mate.

30mins or so on from my urge (triggered from getting home from a week of work and “switching off my brain”) the urge is subsiding and I’m doing something else. And it’s fine. My last urge? - probably not; but will cross that bridge like this one, next time.

cutting things off sounds daunting, but it’s not that bad. And saves you loads of stress and heartache after you’ve blown your hard earned money. It takes 5 mins to do on Gamstop.

We all have moments of weakness; and the blocks help prevent actions we will later regret.

cheers 

Yes lets not kid ourselves because it is a drug addiction and those first minutes is the shot of heroin...the soothing, the escape from our fears and humdrum reality. Its exactly what a drug user seeks and these drugs are harmful just like gambling.

The highs become less, more needs to be taken just to feel normal and we are hooked in a vicious cycle just like alcoholics or class A users. It becomes a nasty little habit so if you feel drug users look extremely sad you need to analyse what a gambling addiction is and take a look in the mirror

The medical textbooks now class this in the same chapter as a drug addiction and I keep posting in the hope that people wont be scared of the term mental illness.

Oh I will just stop after a cheeky twenty is the ultimate delusion...of course that wont happen once hooked. The point of no return happens very early in the hooking process. People arent really even aware that they are fully hooked which makes it even more dangerous

The odds are that you will lose so any thoughts of a win when you want it are purely delusional

I played the slots for forty years. Theres nothin you can tell me about those evil monsters and how they work on our fears and insecurities. I would be a whole lot better off if they had never existed. I darent think what they have cost me. I attempted to write it down but have to put it all behind me.

The people that design them are clever and extremely devious. I dont know how they really sleep at night but they dont care as long as they are cashing in.

Its a familiar slots story which is killing people. The acceptable face of addiction and the acceptable casualties...its nothing short of a monumental scandal. It was never all my fault!

Best wishes to everyone on the forum