When I began gambling 3 years ago I was lost in myself, I was assaulted by an older man who had full control over me and I needed an escape. 20k later I decided to begin the long journey to stop gambling, boy it isn’t easy. I still occasionally played but with really small amounts. It was kinda like my way of dealing with it. It worked, recently I spent 40 quid on super casino and won 2,500 pound. Put everything in place to stop me spending that money but the bug came back. I was so shocked winning I almost didn’t know what to do. Safe to say a month on that money has been Spent and now I find myself having to start from scratch again. It’s like I don’t like winning money because it’s never enough to pay off the 20k though it was a start. I bought things I wanted but then I kinda run out of things I wanted to turned back to gambling. I guess what I’m saying is the casino is always going to win, even if we win we put it back so they always come out on top. Between us all, standing united we can beat this rotten addiction. None of us are alone and together we can do it, keep fighting the fight. I know I am.
You did not deserve to be assaulted, you should seek councelling to help with that. Gambling like all addcitions is aperfect escape from lifes stresses, or in your case trauma. Well done on recognising you have an issue as you deserve a good life which Casinos will not fund. Get councelling and seek out the support of your nearest GA meeting. I wish you well