I am a recovering gambling addict; and when I was “in deep” it was an all encompassing low in my life (as many on this site will recognise).
I see many posts on this site of people in that low; but only (apparently) teetering on the edge of actually getting the support they really need, and taking action appropriately.
please take the plunge and go beyond posting your issues and take real action on it. Make the call to Gamcare. Set up the meetings with a councillor. Block the sites.
I was a secret gambler, and it was destroying me, and was consuming a huge proportion of my life. I joined Gamcare and spoke to the team; and immediately got advice and was set up with a councillor (i was incredibly impressed how fast this happened). I opened up to my wife (this was very hard as I’d already had an episode which I said I’d “sorted”; but guess what.... I relapsed again). She too got individual 1:1 support from the same expert, about my problem and how it affected her (which was invaluable for support - just to understand what I was going through and for her discuss her worries and anxieties). We have even been to counselling sessions together. No matter how close you and your partner are, it’s so good to have a “neutral” understanding individual in a room with you when discussing the madness of gambling.
anyway, I haven’t gambled in months now. I am returning to the skin flint I once was and counting the pennies 😊 (most of us know how your attitude to money changes with gambling through, amongst other things, guilt). But I’m not delusional and I know things can go wrong if I ever kid myself that a little bet is ok.
it is so hard to describe why I now don’t gamble. Especially after being so dependant on it. After talking it through and being open, all I can describe is it’s like (when I approach a bookies or a gambling site) an invisible resistance (like when you hold two magnets together at the “wrong”ends) . It’s because now I really know it made me the lowest I’ve ever been in my life.
I’m so much better today and everyone can feel better too; with help. And I don’t mean to sound righteous- I’m not.
cheers and take care.