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I'll probably never stop till it stops me in my tracks...  

 
unfurla
(@unfurla)

I've stopped and relapsed more times than I care to think about. I'm signed up to Gamban and Gamstop but both are very hackable so absolutely pointless to anyone who really wants to gamble. 

I recently won alot and gave to a family member to hold on to but im using every excuse on the book to pick away at it. I realised I have never spent my winnings on anything other gambling. Its a bleak but I imagine common place outcome. 

Quote
Posted : 7th June 2020 3:36 am
Chris.UK
(@chris-uk)

Hi Unfurla,

Seems like there's no point having any blocks in place then if you can get around them? Why bother trying when you just want to keep picking away at your winnings?

Let's change the questions then. Do you think that gambling has got you beat? Can you control it through willpower? Are you prepared to try? Do you think you are different from other problem gamblers?

Let me answer those questions first. Gambling got me beat. It took everything from me. Willpower had no part in me stopping gambling, I couldn't do it on my own. I needed help. Was I prepared to try? Yes, because the alternative was prison or in a grave. Did I think I was different? Sure, there was no one like me, no one who understood me and what I'd been through. BUT what I found at Gamblers Anonymous and you can too, or through the Gamcare advisers, is that although we are all different and there is no one like you, there are lots of people very similar to you. Some worse, some not so bad, but people like you in many ways.

You just don't know yet because you haven't met these people.

Why blocks despite them being hackable? To give you some thinking time in between wanting to place a bet and actually doing so. To give you time to reach out and ask for help. For some, just having the block in place means they won't even try, they accept they can't so they don't try to bet.

Ask yourself the first question honestly. Has gambling got you beat and if so, are you going to try to do something about it? If not, good luck and carry on until it has got you beat.

If yes, try something different. Call the advisers and share your story. Tell your story on here and maybe someone will reach out and say that sounds like me, like my story. Maybe you could help each other from staying away from a bet. But only if you want to. I want to. I try.

Good luck.

Chris.

ReplyQuote
Posted : 7th June 2020 11:19 am
Joydivider
(@joydivider)

Hi unfurla.

Its an addiction that has millions of people in its grip. Most of them dont really know whats going on until its too late.

It often takes a rock bottom moment they see no way out of to take this addiction seriously.

Its an addiction so crazy I was defrauding my parents with lies to get my fix. Theft really as they would not have given me money if they had known the truth.

An addiction so crazy I would have been homeless if I wasnt defrauding my parents at the time. 

An addiction so crazy that I spent over a week with no electricity on eating on cold tin of beans a day....but I was back gambling and losing all my money again. 

I fished things out of the bin to eat and I remember the taste of the cheapest 36p mayonnaise like it was yesterday....its  disgusting I can tell you!!! When you only have that and stale bread....thats what gambling does to people! 

You would have thought I was getting the message that gambling is a mugs game wouldnt you? However I was back gambling as soon as I got some money again

Gambling is a drug addition and like substance abuse it most often takes a doctor saying this is going to kill you before people get scared enough to give abstention a go.

When I was relapsing I hadnt done  enough to give abstention a chance.

I was playing at it to be blunt with you... I was giving it lip service. Gambling was killing me but i was hooked on the drug and "making things right"

When I felt a rock bottom moment unfurla I cried for three days and curled up in the foetus position in bed...finally...finally something washed over me other than self pity... I phoned my dad and soon afterwards I went around everywhere with pride to self exclude properly.

Gamban and gamstop are further down the list after you realise that you have to give your gadgets up if you cant get proper monitoring on them...tehy are NOT enough on their own because you are not in control of your own mind. this hads nothing to do with you being a grown adult with an ego...you need help when you are prepared to do the right things to stop this

Nothing changes if nothing changes and you need that born again feeling to fight this.

Its not about stopping on your terms...its about stopping with measures that will make you feel uncomfortable until your mind heals

Best wishes from everyone on the forum

This post was modified 4 months ago by Joydivider
ReplyQuote
Posted : 7th June 2020 7:30 pm
Waddell2121
(@waddell2121)

Hi I'm 15 thousand in debt  I've spent 23 thousand please take it from me do everything in your power to stop now i would lose a thousand try and chase it back lose another thousand and so on. Your obviously trying to stop it by giving the winnings away. Maybe you should get to the route cause if the problem like me I'm trying to put every step I can in to prevent but if I want to gamble I'll still work out away to. I've got a appointment to speak to someone about everything which will hopefully help the underlying addiction problem heres hopeing maybe you should try that.

This post was modified 3 months ago by Forum admin
ReplyQuote
Posted : 9th June 2020 4:26 pm
unfurla
(@unfurla)
Posted by: Chris.UK

Hi Unfurla,

Seems like there's no point having any blocks in place then if you can get around them? Why bother trying when you just want to keep picking away at your winnings?

Let's change the questions then. Do you think that gambling has got you beat? Can you control it through willpower? Are you prepared to try? Do you think you are different from other problem gamblers?

Let me answer those questions first. Gambling got me beat. It took everything from me. Willpower had no part in me stopping gambling, I couldn't do it on my own. I needed help. Was I prepared to try? Yes, because the alternative was prison or in a grave. Did I think I was different? Sure, there was no one like me, no one who understood me and what I'd been through. BUT what I found at Gamblers Anonymous and you can too, or through the Gamcare advisers, is that although we are all different and there is no one like you, there are lots of people very similar to you. Some worse, some not so bad, but people like you in many ways.

You just don't know yet because you haven't met these people.

Why blocks despite them being hackable? To give you some thinking time in between wanting to place a bet and actually doing so. To give you time to reach out and ask for help. For some, just having the block in place means they won't even try, they accept they can't so they don't try to bet.

Ask yourself the first question honestly. Has gambling got you beat and if so, are you going to try to do something about it? If not, good luck and carry on until it has got you beat.

If yes, try something different. Call the advisers and share your story. Tell your story on here and maybe someone will reach out and say that sounds like me, like my story. Maybe you could help each other from staying away from a bet. But only if you want to. I want to. I try.

Good luck.

Chris.

Thank you Chris for taking the time to reply. I have now stopped and been clean since Thursday. I'm going to start a new thread and tell my whole story. Hopefully it will echo with others in the same position me and encourage them to stop. 

ReplyQuote
Posted : 14th June 2020 11:56 pm
unfurla
(@unfurla)
Posted by: Joydivider

Hi unfurla.

Its an addiction that has millions of people in its grip. Most of them dont really know whats going on until its too late.

It often takes a rock bottom moment they see no way out of to take this addiction seriously.

Its an addiction so crazy I was defrauding my parents with lies to get my fix. Theft really as they would not have given me money if they had known the truth.

An addiction so crazy I would have been homeless if I wasnt defrauding my parents at the time. 

An addiction so crazy that I spent over a week with no electricity on eating on cold tin of beans a day....but I was back gambling and losing all my money again. 

I fished things out of the bin to eat and I remember the taste of the cheapest 36p mayonnaise like it was yesterday....its  disgusting I can tell you!!! When you only have that and stale bread....thats what gambling does to people! 

You would have thought I was getting the message that gambling is a mugs game wouldnt you? However I was back gambling as soon as I got some money again

Gambling is a drug addition and like substance abuse it most often takes a doctor saying this is going to kill you before people get scared enough to give abstention a go.

When I was relapsing I hadnt done  enough to give abstention a chance.

I was playing at it to be blunt with you... I was giving it lip service. Gambling was killing me but i was hooked on the drug and "making things right"

When I felt a rock bottom moment unfurla I cried for three days and curled up in the foetus position in bed...finally...finally something washed over me other than self pity... I phoned my dad and soon afterwards I went around everywhere with pride to self exclude properly.

Gamban and gamstop are further down the list after you realise that you have to give your gadgets up if you cant get proper monitoring on them...tehy are NOT enough on their own because you are not in control of your own mind. this hads nothing to do with you being a grown adult with an ego...you need help when you are prepared to do the right things to stop this

Nothing changes if nothing changes and you need that born again feeling to fight this.

Its not about stopping on your terms...its about stopping with measures that will make you feel uncomfortable until your mind heals

Best wishes from everyone on the forum

Thank you for taking the time to reply. I have now stopped and been clean since Thursday. I'm going to start a new thread and tell my whole story. Hopefully it will echo with others in the same position me and encourage them to stop

ReplyQuote
Posted : 14th June 2020 11:57 pm
unfurla
(@unfurla)
Posted by: Waddell2121

Hi I'm 15 thousand in debt  I've spent 23 thousand please take it from me do everything in your power to stop now i would lose a thousand try and chase it back lose another thousand and so on. Your obviously trying to stop it by giving the winnings away. Maybe you should get to the route cause if the problem like me I'm trying to put every step I can in to prevent but if I want to gamble I'll still work out away to. I've got a appointment to speak to someone about everything which will hopefully help the underlying addiction problem heres hopeing maybe you should try that.

Thank you for taking the time to reply. I have now stopped and been clean since Thursday. I'm going to start a new thread and tell my whole story. Hopefully it will echo with others in the same position me and encourage them to stop

ReplyQuote
Posted : 14th June 2020 11:58 pm
Chris.UK
(@chris-uk)

Don't worry about your story encouraging others to stop just yet. Just stop yourself. I know I'm probably meant to be more compassionate and say lots of nice things, but all I see is lots of stories of people with a problem who then stop for a couple of weeks and start telling the world what to do.

Just start a diary and look after yourself. In GA we say just give us 90 days. This is to get some clean thinking and see that the world isn't as bad as it might appear, but also to find time to identify with others. After that it's suggested to work a program of change, to help get a clean mind. As you're on here and not on GA then give the Gamcare advisers a call and have a chat about the possibilities of what's available other than just blocks and not betting.

If you're going to start a diary though do it properly, use it regularly and let readers know you aren't gambling. Share the good days as well as the bad. I messaged you over a week ago and you only just came back here. Why? Because you were still gambling for three of those days.

Ask for advice, ask questions, maybe put some advice into practice.

Be open and honest regularly, even if you don't feel like it. That's when it helps me rather than just telling the good stuff and only coming back when you've mucked up. 

Good luck

Chris.

ReplyQuote
Posted : 15th June 2020 10:04 am
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