How to break free? What worked for you?

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(@hullbo)
Posts: 72
Topic starter
 

Just wondering what helped people to break this circle...what did you do to fill the time and how to avoid slipping back, time is sometimes lethal and provides temptation.

I had until recently been gamble free, I had amassed large gambling debts of circa xx, unable to pay them of making minimum token payments of xx a month.

Something triggered me to gamble again last month, using my wages on payday to gamble...I had an incredibly lucky streak which created enough to pay my debts in full...needless to say the circle came back and I lost over half of it.....but at that moment I decided I had enough...I managed to not chase for once and have made agreements with my creditors to make final reduced payments with the money I stopped myself gambling.

So after 5 years of stress and trauma over my gambling debts I am now debt free.

But I am absolutely desperate to not repeat the cycle. I want to leave it for good...but it comes back...put blocks in place, bit temptation is everywhere....how do we overcome and what do you fill your time with?

Thanks to each and every person on this forum for their stories and input, reading it all has made me determined to beat this and not fall back.

This topic was modified 5 years ago by Forum admin
 
Posted : 3rd June 2019 7:21 pm
Richard9
(@richard9)
Posts: 20
 

Hi, i just wrote some things on paper so i can read it back to myself. You're never going to win in the end. Even if you win you're eventually going to lose. Whats the point! You work hard just to P**s it away. There must be other things you can spend this money on to make you happy.

Goodluck!

This post was modified 5 years ago by Richard9
 
Posted : 6th June 2019 4:28 am
(@hullbo)
Posts: 72
Topic starter
 

Hi,

So true, after every low and every time the bank is empty and we are left scraping around for pennies, we can all relate to those feelings.

You are absolutely right, there is more to life, no matter what we win, we can never stop, because we are addicted, it's about learning not to gamble as life is happier, stress free and learning to use our money wisely.

Reprogramming our brains, not easy in a world full of gambling advertising.

You can do this

 
Posted : 6th June 2019 6:13 am
Richard9
(@richard9)
Posts: 20
 

I think you did really well. You walked away with half of your winnings. Most people would of gambled the rest away.  You can keep making token payments and treat yourself or just use it to pay off half your debts. 

 
Posted : 6th June 2019 11:26 pm
gadaveuk
(@gadaveuk)
Posts: 1724
 

Hi

For me to abstain only and do nothing else than just go to work was white knuckling my recovery.

The recovery program was going to help me fill my life with healthy habits.

The prefect idea of recovery is to move from isolating myself to interacting with people and get out and about.

For me to exchange an unhealthy habit in to healthy habits.

By being more accountable to myself and honest with myself I was going to come out of my shell built of fears.

By writing down my needs, writing down my wants, and writing down my goals I was going to extend myself in so many ways.

At the recovery meetings I was going to expose more and more of myself through my therapies and to able to articulate my feelings and emotions in healthy ways.

My fear of being honest would reduce, I would trust more, I would come out of myself even more.

The recovery program was going to help me heal my hurt inner child.

The addictions and obsessions were a form of escaping in my fears, the addictions and obsessions were a symptom that I was emotionally vulnerable.

One of my addictions was to drink, that was because I could not cope emotionally.

When I went to the addictions and obsessions were a way of me escaping in my fears from people life and situations I could not cope with emotionally.

Each time I went to gambling was a form of self abuse, working for days weeks months and giving all my money to a complete stranger.

The recovery program helped me understand what my emotional triggers were.

The recovery program helped me learn how to interact with people rather than react in unhealthy ways.

My emotional triggers were my pains not healed, my fears not faced, my frustrations due to my unreasonable expectations of people life and situations, my loneliness due to my fears of emotional intimacy, my feelings of boredom because I felt that life was boring, that I could succeed, that I avoided facing being accountable and I avoided facing challenges in my life.

My unhealthy reaction in my anger was due to my pains not healed, my fears not faced, my frustrations due to my unreasonable expectations of people life and situations, I use to think that being angry was healthy, not today being angry is not healthy in any way for me today.

My unhealthy reaction in my anger caused further aggression and confrontation, my anger caused people to fear me.

Please keep going to meetings, you will benefit from it in so many ways.

Love and peace to every one.

Dave L

AKA Dave of Beckenham

 
Posted : 7th June 2019 4:01 am

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