Family members enable me to gamble

Well I guess you have to do something. Addicts are creatures of habit. I know I am. If nothing changes then nothing changes. Sounds like restricting access to your own money could help. Without the ammunition you can't do any damage.

Posted by: Magsy

Can I just say straight off that I'm asking for help/advice, not playing a blame game.

I've registered on Gamstop, have Gamban blocking software on my PC (which if fab, by the way) and can't gamble on any gambling accounts of my own.

But I still blow my money gambling. My son and brother give me access to their accounts. So now, that's how I blow my money. They have gambling problems of their own so I can see why they're  enabling me and will continue to enable me, despite me asking them not to - then when I need my fix begging them to let me. And they let me cos they know I'll pay for what I gamble and they get any bonuses and share of the very few wins I have.

I'm thinking of asking someone to take control of my finances in the hope that if I can't pay then they'll not let me use their accounts. But it's daunting cos I'm so used to handling my own finances and a bit of a control freak.

Is that a good idea or can anyone suggest something else?

Thanks

Margy

Hello Margy,

Forum Admin here, although you are struggling to stop gambling completely, you clearly have a good level of awareness of what you can do to finally close the loop holes that are enabling you to continue to gamble.

I think it is an excellent idea for you to find someone you trust to take control of your finances, so you don't, as S.A. said, have the 'ammunition' to gamble with.

I understand this may feel a little difficult to start with because you say you like to be in control; maybe it's worth reminding yourself that your gambling is problematic, so 'control measures' are necessary, even if that means handing over some control for a while.

It may be a good idea to avoid as much as possible, those family members that are enabling you. Particularly   at the start of your recovery, as their behaviour is unsupportive and likely to be triggering for you.

I also wondered whether either peer support through Gamblers Anonymous or one to one treatment support would be worth considering, if you haven't already. Please do give us a call to on the HelpLine to discuss these, or any other support options.

Wishing you all the best with your recovery.

Forum Admin.

Thanks for the replies Forum Admin and S.A.

Got my first one to one therapy appointment with a lady from NECA on Friday. Should have been today but had an emergency appendectomy last Monday and am still sore.

My daughter is home from holiday tomorrow so will get her to change my brother's email and gambling site paswords and then give him the new ones. Have blew a hundred quid on one of his sites this afternoon, it would have been worse if he hadn't set a deposit limit.

It didn't make me feel good but distracted me from other unhappy thoughts.