So it's been a good few weeks since my last post and being honest to my parents and girlfriend. I take sertaline for anxiety and spoke to my doctor about it and explained since my parents helped relieve me I felt as if a huge weight has been taken off my shoulders. My anger levels had dropped dramatically, I also don't feel my heart racing when talking about money.
I'm sleeping better and don't wake up feeling urges or have urges when I'm on my own during the day. I'm all round more relaxed. Spending some really good time with my wee boy instead of just being tired and grumpy and not wanting to do anything.
It's still very early doors and I have such a long way to go to make amends for what I have done for the past ten years. But if we get the go ahead for the house in January then come march we move on to our first real family home and I can start to show everyone that I can become the person I once was.
As always I hope if anyone reads this that they find out that there is a better way to life, and things can change. I'm not looking for sympathy just want to let my words help others in finding the light in the darkness of their mind and gambling problems.
It's a hard issue to open up about to anyone but there are so many ppl ready to listen and not judge you, on the outside we can look so different be in different professions but inside we all have the same issues, same embarrassment, shame, anger etc.