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21 year old gambler - advice needed  

 
Luke44
(@luke44)

I am a 21 year old male who has just finished uni and got my first full time job. I have always had a bet on football but since Christmas this got out of hand and I turned to roulette- running up £5k of debt in a few months. I have started to see the effects this has on the mind, health and relationships.

I am determined to stop, I have gone back to it on single occasions over the past month but I am sure I never want to do this again now - before it gets too far out of hand. I have told my partner everything after hiding it.

Any advice or anyone that can resonate would be greatly appreciated as I haven’t spoken to anyone in a similar situation at all.

Luke

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Posted : 3rd May 2020 9:40 pm
Scar
 Scar
(@scar)

Hi Luke

Welcome to the Gamcare forums, and thank you for sharing your story with us.

 

Im glad you have decided to take the first step in admitting you have a problem with gambling and you want to do something about it. You are a young man and by the sounds of it you have been successful in other areas of your life. 

 

Have you contacted Stepchange or citizens advice regarding your finances? We here to support you, Unfortunately we cant make the debt go away. Its something you will have to face up to, and it will go down in time, providing you stay away from gambling.

 

Would you like to share more on your story? Remember its one day at a time. Dont look too far into the future, just concentrate on the here and now

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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Posted : 3rd May 2020 10:13 pm
Luke44
(@luke44)

Hi Scar, thanks.

in terms of finances I have created a financial plan which is helping me get focused. But I have always chased my losses, and it just spiralled as I lost more and more and has left me with overdrafts and loans etc.

I think I have had a problem for a while without realising it. I spent more and more betting on footy and losing more and more. I then turned to roulette and that’s when it spiralled. Constantly chasing my losses and gambling until I had 0. My main issue is that I just want to recover my financial situation, and I figure a big win could do that - although I know that is entirely unrealistic deep down. I am aware that this could have got worse and worse and that it is not too late to recover and start fresh but it had taken a real toll on my mind - waking up feeling miserable and constant low moods. It also affected my relationship with all of the lying and secrets. I am feeling positive about the future and positive I can beat this, but I know it’s not going to be easy, so figured it would be helpful to contact people in a similar situation.

Luke

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Posted : 3rd May 2020 10:51 pm
chambo4557
(@chambo4557)

Hi Luke,

I am at the very start of a similar situation however my wife found out rather than me telling her.  I think firstly you should be proud you were brave enough to tell your partner and seek help yourself.

I have found a massive relief from speaking to some one.  I have only been seeking help a matter of days however for debt advice the national debtline have provided has been brilliant.  I have also spoken to GamCare on the phone who suggested GAMSTOP and arranged counselling over the phone.

Good luck.  

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Posted : 3rd May 2020 11:28 pm
Givemethebuzz
(@givemethebuzz)

forget about the financial plan if you are skint it will only serve as a reminder of how foolish you have been and it can also trigger you to try and "win some extra" 

instead focus on what you are going to do to STOP gambling how are you going to tackle those urges ? will you have blocks in place ? are family members up to speed on the situation etc 

gamblers only end up in one place and thats in a mess get it sorted now before its too late 

 

 

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Posted : 4th May 2020 12:08 pm
samtrowsdale
(@samtrowsdale)

Hi Luke,

I am 22 years old so can relate to you in that way. I have been gambling for about 4 years and I’d say the last 2 years have been the real issue. I got addicted to online slots and didn’t know how to stop. 

It’s not the end of the world. You have debt and you have to face up to that. I had to do the same. It can be hard but it’s the first step in moving forward. Tell the people close to you; parents, partner or best friend? This can really help with finally getting it sorted. These people can help manage your finances and keep an eye on you. My partner is my rock she always checks on me and makes its very apparent that if I mess around that it will cause issues within our relationship. She has forgiven for my past but it’s only me who can make our future better. I hope you can find someone close who can do this for you.

sign up for GAMSTOP this will self exclude you from a lot of UK sites. I did this for 5 years as I’m serious I want this to be the end.

Keep in touch mate. All the best for your journey 

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Posted : 10th May 2020 10:10 pm
Andy1503
(@andy1503)

Hi Luke 

I can definitely resonate with you as at times I’ve gone from enjoying online poker to ploughing through my bankroll on lightning roulette.

I can’t stress enough to firstly put a block in place. Sign up to gamstop enter all details possible.

That isn’t going to stop you wanting to have a punt though, so that’s where you’d need to look at getting help.

I haven’t solved it yet 6 months down the line, but it’s getting better. 

One thing I’ve found is if you are wanting to change your mindset it takes a lot of being really honest with yourself and often I’ve found looking at it from outside the box, ie looking at your own perspective helps.

Good luck

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Posted : 12th May 2020 11:04 am
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