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Trying to overcome this guilt.


Please know that this is never a position I expected to be in and I’m absolutely terrified of judgement but I have hit my rock bottom. 


I can’t pinpoint when gambling became an issue for me but I can tell you that last night was a turning point and after a terrible sleepless night with endless amounts of guilt and tears, I signed up to gamstop for five years. I knew anything less would not cut it. I’m not in massive amounts of debt but enough for me to have an insane amount of guilt over losing so much in one day and I can’t stop crying. I feel let down by the business I used for not safeguarding me better and realising that I was depositing so much in one day. It may not have seemed like a lot to them but to me it was. 

I just hope the only way is up. I don’t know what else to say or what to do. Thank you.

Topic starter Posted : 11th May 2022 6:13 pm

Hey we've all been there I'm the same as u I lost control its easy done u get sucked into a virtual world but don't be hard on yourself I was you 10days ago crying mad so many emotions but uve realised enough is enough I still feel.guilty but the days are getting easier and the guilt is lifting slowly have u tried counselling x

Posted : 12th May 2022 9:24 am
Forum admin

Hi @deetee,

Thankyou for sharing your story with the forum. You've made a really positive step by signing up to GamStop for five years, you should be proud of yourself for that.


If you would like some additional support for your gambling please do get in contact with us via the helpline at 0808 8020 133 or via Netline. You are not alone with this.


You may also find our chatroom helpful to get some peer support for yourself. These run at 1pm and 8PM every day. 


Thank you for posting and sharing your story, please do continue to use our forum.


Best Wishes

Forum Admin


Posted : 12th May 2022 10:38 am

Hey there.  I know exactly how you feel.  I never gambled a day in my life until I was 40.  I’m 53 now.  I’ve ruined what should have been the 15 most productive years of my life.  Lost my former wife, my kids and dog 1/2 the time, a million dollar home, family vacations that never were….and my self-respect.  The last one is the most important. The others are actually more painful, though.  I let the people who depend on and love me down.  Correct me if I’m wrong…but you haven’t done that much damage…yet.  I know I gambled to escape the tough things in life.  I didn’t know how to express my feelings and solve

problems in my life.  My emotional intelligence was 0.  After hours and hours of counseling I have learned that it was not all my fault.  I hate Las Vegas.  That is where it all unfolded.  And then they brought the machines to my state.  I hate the government for making it legal.  They might as well have started selling C*****e at the grocery store.  We can only move forward, though.  Take care of and love yourself.  I know how hard that is…. I work on it every day.  Exercise, read and reach out to others.  My kids don’t know anything about it all.  They are my best friends.  I spend as much time with them as possible because they remind me that my future can be brighter than any of my past.  
Be strong!  I have relapsed many times.  I’m only on Day 3 now.  I’m just proud of my gains.  I joined this site to share with others, offer my support and receive support in return.  We can ALL stop!  You are better than that!  Find joy in other things.  The joy I get from being with and supporting my kids dwarfs the joy of winning a bet…and it NEVER fades. It’s just like putting money in the bank and never spending it!  My accounts (the real accounts containing love, pride, and self-respect) are appreciating at an exponential rate!  It is my intent to NEVER let gambling take withdrawals from those accounts ever again!!!!

I am here for you!  I believe in you!  
Please don’t let gambling be in control of your soul ever again!


All my Best,


Posted : 12th May 2022 7:34 pm
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