I cannot drive past a bookies without going in. It’s starting to drain me mentally. Every penny I have to hand his being blown. I’ve applied for a Barcleys bank account with gambling restrictions turn on, as I’m hoping that this will prevent me from entering as I cannot use my bank card. Can any advise be given to stop the temptation, before I start hurting people around me 😢
Hi Davey, I too drive past one from work and think just a quick tenner and end up spending everything. I recently had a big loss playing the fobt. When I sit back I know I can’t control it and will always lose but still go in, always after free money and I know a win makes me feel great. But the losses hurt so much more. I’m usually so sensible in most things yet can’t control my urge to gamble. I’ve been years without it before and know how good it feels. Try and find some barriers like posting on here and listening to others. I’m on day 4 and already feel better but I know that when I get money I’m vulnerable so it’s getting over that hurdle. Keep posting mate and keep positive
The First thing is chuck your cash card away i e cut it in half , just so u can still make purchases over the phone etc . [ most of my /many peoples shopping is online, we ironically are becoming a cashless society , yet we still find ways to use cash to gamble [ the gaming companies are aware of this ,and i predict given the chance , they will have tap payment or debit cards slots introduced soon ,i said back in the 80's one day these things will take notes !!!!! ] ..
Always Use your apple wallet on your i phone . or any equivalent , many transactions can be paid for by that method . My last Gamble day i did £500 in cash and repeatedly drew money from the cash machine . it stops that game straight away . only carry a £20 note [ for taxis ] etc .
And every time you go past a bookie , [ and thats where my losses took place ] think of them with contempt , and remember , they will probably be laughing about you , to there colleagues , as they empty the £ x amount you have just chucked away in there money making racket . think of that , for a minute before you step in . then turn back . it gets very easy eventually , just like any drug / illness the first weeks are the worst .
It is actually a drug addiction when you learn about it. You stop the temptation by focusing on the misery and loss and then doing something directly about it. Tell your family restrict your access to cash and go to a gamblers anonymous meeting
You need to do the cold turkey...oh you will think about gambling but you wont be able to do it. You rattle for a while and then your mind gradually heals. My mind is now clear that gambling is like putting my hand into the hottest fire in hell
You should be feeling a born again moment where you want no more gambling. It will destroy you. I hit a rock bottom moment where I was crying for three days then I finally saw the light.
If you keep gambling it is a train ride to hell. It will call at all the stops of desperation until you can handle it no more. To be very blunt it kills people who couldn't get off the hell ride at a previous stop.
You dont need gambling in your life...its not the answer. When addicted you have no control anyway.
Gamblers dont see the true picture...the true odds. Their mind is full of the lucky clover and addicted arrogance that they will have a little win. What they choose to forget is its way more likely the bookies will have a win from us. They are not running a charity. Its a tax on hope which they have bottled up for sale. They are making a killing and laughing all the way to the bank.
They aren't walking to the cash machine in a numb daze...we were!
So please do something strong and positive about this. Secrets are no good for you so tell someone close
Best wishes from everyone on the forum
I think you've got some really solid advice from the other posters. The other thing I would like to add is what about signing up for the MOSES scheme? This means you can self-exclude from a number of betting shops in one go 0800 294 2060.
Also consider giving out helpline a call 0808 8020 133, if you haven't already, to discuss with an adviser about extra support and help eg a treatment referral.
Wishing you all the best
A way of looking at things could be like this
Your brain is set up a bit like this, 20% is the reality you are experiencing right now and 80% is history helping you make sense of the 20% of reality you are experiencing right now. So 80% is all the stuff you have experienced before is partly to blame for the behaviour you may be experiencing right now. You are just doing what you have always done. IF you. want to change that pattern you need to look at changing that behaviour by doing something completely different. Take another route, look the other way. Find that different behaviour to tackle the current one, and should you feel an urge, recognise that your brain is playing you a tape that's been on repeat for a while. It can be done but you must take a few steps back and ask your inner voice about what you are doing. There is no need to act on any impulse. In fact, it is completely unnecessary to act on every impulse if you have other options. Never give up!
Good luck in your recovery!