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Stealing to gamble

 
oak_z1
(@oak_z1)

Hi, 

My name is Luke and I am 25 years old. 

I recently made a massive mistake that could have cost me everything and stole a lot of money that wasn't mine (I would rather not go into details) just to gamble it all away. I am a step dad to an amazing 5 year old girl and will be a dad myself soon with my partner due in February.

My biggest regret is not thinking about how what I have done has affected the people around me, I have made the first step and started to try to control my habit and never gamble again.

Today is day 1 of my gamble free journey and I want to try and reach out to others who are in a similar situation or have been before, if anyone would like to talk please do get in contact.

Hope to hear from someone soon.

 

 

 

Quote
Topic starter Posted : 3rd August 2022 9:16 pm
Hercules
(@hercules)

Day 1 again for me too.

Just need to keep it going this time. First target 8pm tonight. 

ReplyQuote
Posted : 4th August 2022 5:13 am
NevrLearn
(@nevrlearn)

Hey Luke , 

Were all here due to our addiction and all trying to get help and guidance.  if u need someone to chat to i am always happy to talk to you about my story and listen to yours if that helps you in any way . 

I am too on day 1 after doing 2 days of no gambling yep 2 embarrassing but still for me thats alot 

 

Thanks NevrLearn

ReplyQuote
Posted : 4th August 2022 6:11 am
oak_z1
(@oak_z1)

Hi Both,

 

I had an urge yesterday while my gf was out but thank fully I overcame that urge so onto day 2!

 

I think I would benefit for hearing your stories.

 

Luke

 

 

ReplyQuote
Topic starter Posted : 4th August 2022 9:04 am
Chris.UK
(@chris-uk)

@oak_z1 I think you would benefit from sharing your story with a bit more detail so that others can relate. A lot of compulsive gamblers have stolen to gamble, i have many times. Gambling took priority over everything, including my morals, and I’ve made many mistakes that a lot of people outside of my GA group wouldn’t understand.

I’d also ask what you have done about trying to stop your gambling? If you are having urges on day two by relying on willpower eventually that will run out. You need to do more. Have you told your GF? Have you given over access to your money? Have you contacted a gamcare advisor or a GA meeting?

I’d be interested to hear.

Chris.

ReplyQuote
Posted : 4th August 2022 1:04 pm
oak_z1
(@oak_z1)

@chris-uk Hi Chris,

If it will help people I will share my story. 

 

I started gambling when I was 18, not really anything of a bad habit just the odd £5/£10 on the football every weekend. This never really got out of hand.

It was recently when it really started to change my life. After already blowing £1000 of my wages (mostly online slots) and somehow keeping this from my GF I ended up chasing the money I had lost. For the last 3 months my paycheque has gone straight out of my account trying to chase what I had lost. After theses 3 month I had lost £2000-£2200. This may not seem like a lot but to me this is nearly 2 month wages. 

What happened next was a very low point in my life, I stole from my employer the sum of around £800 and lost it all, at this point in my life it was the lowest I had ever felt. I have a baby on the way and I was thinking suicidal thoughts, after deep consideration of what I was doing I had to come clean before it got worse. 

I told my GF what I had done and she bailed me out in order to keep my job before anyone at work find out. now I have self-excluded myself through gamstop and moses and I have joined the gamcare community.

 

If I could give anyone advice it would to be to talk to close ones, of course at first they will not be happy at all maybe even be angry but the ones that love you are the ones that will help you. If anyone would like to ask me any questions or would like me to go into further detail so that it helps their own journey please let me know.

 

ReplyQuote
Topic starter Posted : 4th August 2022 1:27 pm
Chris.UK
(@chris-uk)

@oak_z1 Firstly, well done on being honest with your girlfriend, although I suspect it was through necessity and having no other way to go. It’s not a criticism, I’ve been in that situation myself when I couldn’t see a way out and being honest and coming clean seemed better than losing a job or worse. Now you’ve done that you can make a start on it and what you’ve done already is great.

I would recommend two more things  initially to help yourself. Contact your bank and have a gambling transaction ban put on your account and get your wages paid directly to your girlfriend. It’s not forever but if you don’t have access to money then you can’t gamble. That might help with the urges.

Secondly, tell your girlfriend that she shouldn’t bail you out again. Now I can hear you saying that you won’t do it again and I’m sure you mean it. I did too. But what I had actually done was to open that pathway where stealing money was acceptable if I put it back and no one knew about it. Next time I’d win. But I didn’t and I had that get out clause that I’d get bailed out. So if you tell her not to, it might help you to know there would be consequences.

I say this to you now because I know those consequences. Ruined relationships, broken families, lost jobs and prison. You have a chance to not go through that because if you carry on you will end up there.

Maybe put gamblock on your phone so you can’t even watch any gambling. No access to any sites or even watching others on YouTube. Out of sight, out of mind. 
Good luck and thank you for sharing.

Chris.

This post was modified 2 weeks ago by Chris.UK
ReplyQuote
Posted : 4th August 2022 2:18 pm
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