Just a message I want to get out there for anyone struggling.
I have battled gambling addiction for over 5 years. It has got me into financial trouble and has taken a toll on my mental health.
I’ve started to note down how it made me feel, I’ve recorded myself talking to myself about the problem. I have also wrote a little poem at one of my lowest moments:
“Online casinos made me so high, I believed they could take the pain away so I don’t want to die.
I put all my chips on one hand today.
Dealer draws a 6, I draw a 10. f### the bills, f### the rent. Let me double down again!
Nobody knew that I would draw a 2, dealer smirks, says good luck and winks at me too. He draws an 8 and then a 5, I’ve lost it all again and f###ed up my life.
I must be insane to keep going back again. Online casinos leave me with debt, but do not heal the pain.
So many holidays, possessions and experiences are our the door. Can’t wait to get paid and gamble some more. They say dreams come with a price, so I get my pay check and roll the dice.
I come across as friendly and nice. If I told you my secrets you wouldn’t trust me twice.
Online casinos made me so low. Nobody knew how much money I’d blow.”
After a couple of relapses, I’m doing much better, I have found new hobbies and taken my mind off gambling completely.
If you’re struggling right now please talk to your friends or someone you trust. If you can’t keep a promise to yourself, try to make a promise to them that you will do your best to get rid of the problem.
There is hope! Stay strong! ❤️
I think my sister knows as yesterday she dropped things into conversations that could have let me admit it! I would have except we were driving and my nephew was in the car so just not the right time! I have decided to talk to her and admit this out loud! We are very close but this has been affecting our relationship and I didn’t even notice until she said! I’ve been so distracted by thoughts of gambling I’ve been disinterested in everything else! Yesterday I got through a tough day....proud of myself!