I'M A NEWBIE!

6 Posts
6 Users
0 Likes
2,312 Views
(@crochetgirl)
Posts: 1
Topic starter
 

Hi there, just wanted to say a quick hello to all the peeps out there who are sharing their stories.

I have been playing online roulette for about 3 years but since lockdown it has been occupying too much of my thoughts and my time and I want to get it under control before it becomes a big issue.  I think, because money is tight, I would like to make an extra bit of cash each month.  I set myself a daily target of £3 up (I know its not much but it makes a difference, believe me!)  The problem is that if I start losing, I keep wanting to chase my losses and before they stopped you drawing on your credit cards, I had run up a few hundred and felt guilty and terrible about that.  I have paid that off and I'm not in debt at all (in fact I'm probably in profit) but the time I have spent on the exercise is ridiculous.  I'm an anxious person anyway and don't sleep well and wonder whats driving the whole thing.  I have been feeling extremely lonely in my marriage and wonder if I see gambling as a 'friend' somehow.  Anyone out there felt the same?  My husbands car has just gone wrong and it could be very expensive to fix and I'm now worried I will try to win the money to pay for it as I'm concerned how we will find the cash.  Any feedback would be very welcome as I'm sat here on the computer trying not to log on to my usual online sites.

Have a good day everyone and I look forward to getting to know some of you.

 
Posted : 28th January 2021 6:35 am
(@bladesman)
Posts: 328
 

Hi and welcome. It sounds like you think you have a problem and from reading your post I think you are right. You are using the usual words about chasing losses and thinking about gambling most of the time. At the moment you are in control of this but have lost in the past and been lucky enough to pay that off. 

My advice to you would be to stop now before this evil addiction really grabs hold of you. You say money is tight so you can't afford to get dragged into the downward spiral of chasing bigger and bigger losses. I speak from experience in that when I started it was a bit of fun but as I gradually lost more the chasing urges became more and ended up completely taking over. Even when I won I would keep going thinking I could win more. This is a common thread with people, all chasing the magic big win to put things right knowing full well it is extremely unlikely to happen and if it did we wouldn't be sensible and draw it out and stop.  

Only you can decide which path you take but please think carefully about this, you have probably been reading other peoples stories and there is no half measures, you need to put blockers in place to prevent you from gambling. Register with Gamstop, put a blocker on your phone or whatever you use, I have betblocker installed, and ask your bank to block gambling transaction from your card.

It took me 5 years and a lot of debt before I stopped and that was only because I was found out. With the help of Gamcare who organised counselling, the blockers mentioned above and the support of the people closest to me I am now over 7 months gamble free. Don't get me wrong, it has been hard and cannot let my guard down but I am determined to never gamble again.

Please stop now before it takes over everything.

Good luck

 

 
Posted : 28th January 2021 8:56 pm
Joydivider
(@joydivider)
Posts: 2156
 

Hi Crochetgirl and welcome to the forum.

Im going to jump right in by saying that roulette is a highly addictive and delusional form of gambling. Its deviously designed to look like a soft system that gives you options and control on lower odds.

The spinning of the wheel sets up expectation drugs in your system and creates addicts very fast. As the next spin in in about a minutes time people don't generally walk away because the human psyche wants another go. 

The whole thing is set up to distract people away from the reality of the word gambling. The reality of gambling is that it is not an income scheme and all the risk is really with you. In the extremely unlikely event that a betting amount would worry them...they would refuse the bet.

The reality of roulette is the grim faces of people elbowing each other to get a late bet in.  Cheating, Camera disputes and near fights as cold sweat desperation gambling sets in. People being escorted out and told to come another day because the gambling dens want addicts to return. This is no James Bond film...... Roulette destroys people just like every other form of gambling

Ask yourself why you are turning to gambling when there are lots of other things to do. Gambling is a strong escape drug so it may well be that you are more depressed anxious or jaded than you think.

You are here so you must be worried about your behaviour. Please tell someone close what you have lost or how it compels you to gamble again.

Its a progressive addiction which will drag you down. You may thinks its still a comfort zone now but gambling has shocking new lows in store for you.

It's certainly no friend...its your two faced enemy! 

Best wishes from everyone on the forum

 

This post was modified 3 years ago by Joydivider
 
Posted : 28th January 2021 9:40 pm
Forum admin
(@forum-admin)
Posts: 5946
Admin
 

Hi @crochetgirl,

 

Thank you for coming to the forum and for sharing your story.

 

I am sorry hear how you have been affected by the roller-coaster of ups and downs in your gambling and how this has impacted on your marriage and your feelings of loneliness. Many people gamble as a form of escapism or to fill a void as a way to switch off from their isolation and loneliness, so you are not alone.

 

Have you thought about any hobbies or interests that you could do to take the focus away from the gambling. This would add some fulfilment and enjoyment into your recovery. Making some changes in your routine and lifestyle can have a real positive impact on your recovery and wellbeing.

 

If you haven’t already, I would encourage you to make an appointment with your GP surrounding your anxiety, sleep deprivation, and any other feelings you may be experiencing currently.

 

It is really positive that you have highlighted your own concerns around your gambling. Have you thought about installing some self-exclusion and blocking software to add some protection to your recovery, ensuring things are in place if you experience an urge to gamble in the future.

I would encourage you to contact the GamCare Helpline on 0808 8020 133 or Netline to talk through what has been going on, and look at how you can make these strategies work best in your circumstances and discuss treatment options as well. We are available 24/7.

 

Keep posting and sharing

 

Regards

Dan

Forum Admin

 
Posted : 28th January 2021 9:51 pm
(@jessrey91)
Posts: 3
 

Also a newbie here. Taken the first steps to try and stop gambling. I have found it so hard. I keep saying to myself 'it's time to stop' 'just one more time and that's it' but it never is the end. Iv tried to speak to my partner about it but he just doesn't understand. He just says 'well just stop, stop doing it' he thinks it's as easier as that but it's not. He really doesn't understand. And I have noone else I feel comfortable talking to about my problems. People have enough of there own problems at the minute, they don't need adding to it. It's easier just keeping it to myself. I have 2 children under 3 and a partner who are my absolute world. I need to stop for them. But lockdown and the past year have just added to it all and iv just gambled more and more and more. We have no money for rent, food or bills. And my partner doesn't know. He thinks we have money in the bank. He is disabled  and can't look after the accounts (im his full time carer) I have responsibility for all our accounts and things so he doesn't know about our money problems. I don't know what I'm going to do. I can't hide it for much longer. Even though I have people around me, I have never felt so alone. 

This post was modified 3 years ago by JessRey91
 
Posted : 31st January 2021 12:27 am
(@soysauce147)
Posts: 145
 

Hi Crochetgirl, 

Thanks for sharing your story in the forum.

Totally agreed with the advices, tips and suggestions given.

You mentioned about gambling for income, which is a very terrible idea. This thought process is probably your monkey idea of dealing with incoming danger, or difficult scenarios etc. However, you're no longer in that prehistoric world anymore, and need a sensible solutions. If you let this monkey run wild in your mind- this can destroy livelihoods, lives, and destruction at all level. 

I hope this helps.

Xoi

Stay sane, safe, and calm

 
Posted : 31st January 2021 1:04 am

We are available 24 hours a day, every day of the year. You can also contact us for free on 0808 80 20 133. If you would like to find out more about the service before you start, including information on confidentiality, please click below. Call recordings and chat transcripts are saved for 28 days for quality assurance.

Find out more
Close