Hi everyone ,joined this ground beginning of January,I want to keep for my own personal record and to show you it can be done!!
I've been a compolsive gambler for about 15 years ,I have spent thousands and thousands of pounds on this hard addiction,I have lost partners threw it nearly lost my business because of it and the list continues!
3 years ago my partner paid for professional help in London ,I had a 2 day assesment walked out of there an blew a grand in the bookies .to cut a long story short my addiction kept beating me on a daily basis!
2 years ago my son lost his mum ,our world crumbled ,with all this pressure and stress my gambling continued to go threw the roof ,fast forward 2 years of still continuing to blow hundreds and hundreds of pounds on a weekly basis losing friends ,family falling out with me and very nearly lost my partner who has always been by my side but enough was enough for her !
It was this January my life changed for the better ,even still after being self excluded from every book maker ,gamban on my phone etc I would still find a way to get my fix , January 2020 came and I went to a pub with a mate for a pint and food it was then disaster struck !!! I had just blown all my business account and the money I had put aside to get us threw Jan and February as these are tough months for me as I'm a Gardner ,I walked up the hill to my house and instantly broke down to my partner saying it's gone we have nothing,I always remember the argument it caused after about 30 mins of shouting and crying I went to check on my son ,I found him crying his heart out saying dad why are you spending all our money gambling,he was shaking with worry of the thought of losing the house and the family spilting up ! I looked at him in the eyes and thought this poor boy is broken ,he has just been threw the hardest time of his young life losing his mum and now his dad is a gambling addict !!
I cried my self to sleep that night thinking I don't deserve to have what I've got ,I'm my son's hero and I'm letting him down massively,it was that moment I looked in the mirror and said it's make or break now Lee !!!
I no it's very early stages and yes I still do get urges but something has changed my way I look at gambling now ! I absolutely hate what its caused to not just me but my family especially my poor son !!in 45 days I have done so much ,bought tools for the business and taken my family on little day trips !!
I'm a firm believer if you really want to stop you will !! Keep believing people we will beat it !!
Massive well done to you!!
I had to hit rock bottom before I confessed all to my wife, but I’m now 50 days GF and have zero desire to ever gamble again, I won’t even buy a lottery ticket or play a friendly game of poker!
I wish you well in your recovery.
Kram
That's a great achievement!!keep being strong and I wish you all the best in your recovery
That was a real roller-coaster just reading that. I can't imagine what it was like to live it. I am proud of how far you have come in a short space of time. Thank-you for sharing with us. I hope you stay strong and beat this horrible addiction.
Drama x
Hi
I was reading your post and it made me feel very emotional. In a way I'm glad it almost broke you because you need to go to the deepest depths of the addiction to get your way out. Im not being horrible when I say it. I'm glad you've realised that the only way is up now by quitting.
I am 155 days free, I read a book. I know what your thinking how can a book change your mind set. But it really did. Alan carrs easy way to beat gambling. I swear by that book. It's done wonders for me.
Wishing you all the very best in your recovery
Sarah 🙂
Hey !! Massive thanks for this powerful response! This certainly just made me smile ! Still bet free ??
Hi Sarah ,that's absolutely fantastic achievement go you !!! Yes I also enjoy reading , I'm still bet free ,agree it's an horrendous addiction,I wish you all the very best in your recovery ??
First off mate that’s class what you’ve dad and amazing for everyone around you that’s literally amazing and that’s on you!! Just know that you’ve got it in you and you know it too don’t let anyone tell you different yeah you still might have weak moments but when you do just refer in your head and go back to you knowing deep inside you what you really can do and know it’s all your doing so good on you I’ll subscribe to this so I know what’s going on
All the best for you man
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