I lapsed on day 8 but knew and had planned it..why

Hi Jill,

Thank you for coming back to the forum and posting again. We're sorry to hear that you've had a lapse. It sounds like you've been concentrating on blocking your access to funds. Have you also considered blocking your access to gambling sites? Gamstop is a free scheme that would let you self exclude from all sites registered with the UK Gambling Commission, and there are also apps you can install which block you from opening the sites in the first place. 

Find out more about these options at our website:

https://www.gamcare.org.uk/self-help/blocking-software/

https://www.gamcare.org.uk/self-help/self-exclusion

If you'd like a bit more support to help you stay away from gambling, we offer free 1:1 and group treatment which are available by phone and webcam. You'd be very welcome to contact us to find out more, on 0808 8020 133 or by Livechat. We're here 24/7.

Best wishes

Deirdre
Forum Admin

When my husband challenhed the bank about it they said because it was a foreign transaction they couldnt block it

Thanks deidre i have gamstop and gamban too..and have signed up for 1:1 support

If you have registered with Gamstop you will be self excluded from all sites. This is a great barrier but to tackle teh root cause you need to change your behaviour. Its easier said than done for an addict and we need support in this journey. That is one of the main reasons why support groups like GA work so well. We are use to keeping things secret like Paypal access, you can change this, it will take time and serious effort but you can really tackle this. Open up to your partner also, again I know its difficult but its the best way forward imo.

Thanks Joe. My family know all about it and have done for a while. I found my local GA group just before lockdown but it didnt help me. When i hit my big low last week the crisis team gave me  this site. Its been a huge help. I know i can do this

Hi Jill and welcome to the forum.

Food for thought. Your addiction knew you would be back gambling because it looked at you, looked at your blocks and thought... Im in here. chocks away!....yippee its a green light to go.

Its a split mind disorder and your addiction controls everything you do related to gambling urges and gambling activity.

Your addition thought don't tell Jill that she needs a deep born again moment. Let her believe she can do it with casual willpower alone. Let her think her thoughts and she wont be powerful enough to beat me!

You addiction thought hey Jill wants to stop but I certainly dont. Im not having Jill spoiling my fun...my party!

No real worries though because I reckon Jill wont come out with all the strong foundations to beat me. I will let her think she is doing ok and then come out next tuesday afternoon after she has been paid...I will bide my time because Im in her bones...be a right laugh as I get high on dopamine and Jill wont know whats hit her again

The reality Jill is that its a drug addiction and a mental illness. You are not in control of your own mind and you need all the help you can get.

Its not just about deciding to stop. Its about telling your family, restricting access to money, time and locations while finding a deep born again moment to fight it off with all your heart.

Half measures wont do which is why many many people relapse time and time again.

Best wishes from everyone on the forum

I am stronger now that I have the right support. I turn 50 tomorrow and I refuse to give in. I have asked friends and family for 50 challenges for the year ahead. I have the 51st challenge which is to wake up each day and say I will not gamble today.