I am new and feeling very down at the moment

Hi Joydivider,

Thank you for your kind message.

I agree with you about gambling being a scam as it felt like they knew my next move (I would bet maximum amount and wouldn't get even a small win and then will get a big win with only 10% of the tickets after having few days break (it felt like they wanted to lurke me into it again) and I gave in so many times. It's true that wins are worse than looses as I enjoy making money so much as for me that seemed like a perfect catch. Until I learned that it's so much more to it. I am so happy that I put blocks to my accounts(I had about 20 accounts with various bingo sites). It will take me few months to get back on my feet and I'm really hoping not to look back and not to get involved with any sort of gambling. I knew deep inside me that is a dangerous game but the gambling sites makes you feel like you are somehow special if you win(the host would always congratulate you on your winnings and would start conversation with you) but its always hunted me on how they say "well done". Well done for what?I haven't worked hard and haven't done anything for them to say "well done". So that was one of the first things that got me thinking...And the final thing was me sinking into financial difficulties-I ended up having to walk for abut an hour to work because I would gamble away my bus fare money. I would convince myself that's better and healthier for me anyway...

How naive...

That nearly got me crying...Its actually crazy to think that mostly it's a rambom situation that get you started but then winnings gets you to carry on(as it feels so good to win). I can imagine that for 16 years old any "free" money can feel amazing. I remember my first ever winning(I was around 15) and played loterry -won about £10 and that just felt sooo good. I didn't become addictive then because I didn't have access to any funds. 

I also remember what triggered for me to get addicted this time-my partner and mother in law buying a lotto ticket. I though that the chances are like 1 in million. I rather try bingo as the chances are of winning are usually much greater but here I am ...

It's so true about winnings-I actually wish I never won. It's day 2 of gambling free and I feel calmer but the guilt of spending money (that meant to be spent on bills and other essentials)is still there. I read many stories on there and realised that once you enter the world of gambling then many of us go through a constant battle with ourselves. The urge is unbelievable. 

Morning Evita34,

Thanks for sharing your story. 

I do have a few suggestions to beat the habit.

1. Open a Monzo account (is the first bank that blocking gambling transactions as well as a budgeting tool) and you can also create locking pots etc.  

2. Findings healthy replacements for your gambling such as short walks, reading, listening to the radio, learning something etc. Hobbies that interest and it doesn't harm you financially, emotionally, and spiritually. 

3. Gambling urges arise, go and watch Only Phil on Utube. 

I hope this helps. 

Xoi

Ps stay sane, safe, calm, and take one day at a time