Hi folks

Hi all. Well I’m 33 and from about the age of 20 I done football coupons and bought the odd scratch card. Would never put more than a fiver on a coupon. I played the fruit machines in pubs when out but again was usually a few quid in loose change after a few pints. Fast forward to early 2019 and I started to put £x-£x in the slots at the bingo which I went 2-3 times a month. The second time I played the slots at bingo I won £x. As a was at the bookies every Saturday lunchtime putting my coupon on and due to the fact I won that at the bingo I then started to play the slots in the bookies. The first few times I was leaving the bookies up around £x-£x each time. Looking back that’s when my mindset changed and I genuinely thought winning money was easy by playing slots. Over the weeks I wasn’t winning and was then leaving the bookies with a loss, wasn’t massive losses but still what would usually only cost me a fiver on a Saturday was now costing me £x to £x. Things really changed when I started online slots. June 2019 was my first time playing online slots. I was usually putting £x in on a Friday night and would play with small stakes to lengthen my playing time and could times cashed about £x bit majority off weeks I lost the £x. In August off last year I put £x in and won £x. I couldn’t believe it. Cashed the lot. Things then went massively wrong. After that win I was constantly chasing it. I kept playing playing the same game with bigger stakes and putting more money in. I bought a car with the money so that was gone as well but I did have a car to show for it. Around October time one night when I was drinking and my partner was asleep I somehow managed to gamble £x in less than an hour. Didn’t sleep that night and felt sick. This happened again the following weekend this time £x. My partner obviously noticed money was missing and I was honest. From then I never really gambled much my partner monitored it and really she was the reason I never as knew there would be arguments. 4 weeks ago I put £x in and within 10 minutes had a balance off £x. Should Uave been happy and cashed but I never. I spent the lot this then followed with my putting my entire months wage and more in over the the course off the night. This time I wasn’t honest with my partner I lied and said it was some issue with my bank. The truth will come out. Since that 4 weeks ago I cannot stop myself. I’ve been about £x every couple days trying to win it back. It’s now Sunday and I am down a further £x. Got up this morning I have excluded myself on Gamstop. It’s***t me this morning just how bad it has got. I’ve wasted thousands. Genuinely feeling low in mood due to it as well. I’m hoping today is the first day I don’t gamble again. Sorry for the long winded intro but that actually felt like a massive relief spilling that all out there.