Fruit, flashing lights, and coin drop sounds have ruined my life.

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(@charlieboy)
Posts: 1013
 

Yozza that's a powerful post ty  it gives us all hope to carry on gamble free. I had a badish day yesterday but I didn't gamble so for me that turned into a positive. Yozza and Rambo read my post on my diary yesterday gives a bit of an insight what my addiction has been like. Onwards and upwards for all of us

 
Posted : 2nd July 2020 9:51 am
yozza67
(@yozza67)
Posts: 22
 

How amazing are we, that when the Covid disaster has happened we as a human race can turn positives out of this. It meant coz I could not go the bookies, once I stopped all online gambling I could not continue and this has begun my habit of being Gamble free, hope that door stays locked and I never find the key.

 
Posted : 2nd July 2020 10:05 am
(@charlieboy)
Posts: 1013
 

???to that yozza

 
Posted : 2nd July 2020 10:11 am
yozza67
(@yozza67)
Posts: 22
 

Hi Charlie boy just read your diary from yesterday. It is scary what we do to cover our tracks when gambling. I remember when my wife gave me her tv licence bill and around 150 quid to pay it. Obviously I used the money to gamble and got down to two pounds left and some how managed to gamble and got the money back to 150, however by then the post office and bank was closed. My wife came home and I exclaimed 'oh sorry I forgot to go' I'll go tomorrow. My wife was fine and I told me to go the next day. Next day lost the lot and borrowed twenty pounds from a friend and phoned the tv licence people to give me an extra week and just paid off 20 pounds off the bill. It's important to remember the past but dont dwell on it. In the future if we get our act together we can look at making up for it,what's gone is gone. 

 
Posted : 2nd July 2020 10:41 am
(@charlieboy)
Posts: 1013
 

Yeah we do bad stuff when gambling like you say don't dwell on it that can have a very negative effect. Sometimes for me writing stuff down is a good thing it's like I'm owning it more , I've put it out there for people to read does that make sense.

 
Posted : 2nd July 2020 11:17 am
yozza67
(@yozza67)
Posts: 22
 

Yes, it makes perfect sense. We are not bad people. We are just good people feeding a bad habit. I am alive in good health, brilliant wife, good friends. Outside of gambling I am happy with myself. When we start gambling we do it with good intentions, thinking winning lots of money will make us happy, which is the hook that drags us in. We will have have had some wins before we lost and the addiction causes us to try and feel we will win again, which just wont happen, it takes time and wont be easy. Dont look back, dwelling was a house where we use to live  we have now moved out and where not going back. That house looked good from the outside but evil lay inside.

 
Posted : 2nd July 2020 11:39 am
yozza67
(@yozza67)
Posts: 22
 

Just an extra little note, I dont know if it's just me, but whenever I watch somebody else play on a FOB or fruit machine it always looks like they win as soon as I come away. I then start to feel jealous and hope they will lose. It is sad really, now I know that's just part of my addiction.

 
Posted : 2nd July 2020 11:47 am
(@charlieboy)
Posts: 1013
 

Yes yozza addiction warps your whole way of thinking  don't worry called intrusive thoughts and come in to try and trip you up I think

 
Posted : 2nd July 2020 12:04 pm
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